Absolute Gravity

I wasn’t ready.

I didn’t want to see.

I couldn’t do it again.

Clara barged into my room while I was reading. She was blubbering, something I didn’t understand. Just something about spaceships and wizards. I stared at her blankly for a moment. I would have made a joke out of it if she hadn’t looked so serious. But I had no idea what she was talking about.

“Clara,” I said, setting my book on the nightstand so I could slide the watch onto my wrist. “Why don’t you slow down a bit? I only understood like three words coherently.”

But I could feel my heart pounding. Not the heart in my memory that didn’t know what was happening. But my real heart. Somewhere far away. The part of me that knew what was about to happen.

She was crying. Holding her hand over her lips as if she could keep it contained there. Then she reached for the remote and turned on the TV. I immediately understood.

I’d had enough time to come to terms with the fact that we weren’t alone in the universe. I’d been carrying something ancient and cosmic inside me long before I knew it. It was no surprise that something made contact again. It was also no surprise that when that craft exited the atmosphere, Tony Stark was with it.

“They took him?” I asked her, moving to stand up now. She was still sobbing and shook her head.

“Of course not! He hitched a fucking ride! I told him not to. I told him to come home. To let it go. But of course he didn’t. Friday lost connection to his suit when he exited the atmosphere. I have no idea where he is, and I don’t know what to do.” She threw her head into her hands and cried. I moved around the bed to pull her into a hug. She fell against me and cried into my shoulder. I patted her back.

“Hey, I get it. It’s scary. But this is Tony we’re talking about. I’m sure he thought he had a good reason. He’ll get to the bottom of this. He’ll be fine. He always is.” She dropped onto my bed.

“But one day, he won’t be. What if this is it, Jo?” She looked up with tear-stained eyes. “What if this is the time he doesn’t come home? What am I supposed to do?” I sat down beside her.

“I can’t even pretend to know,” I admitted. “But whatever it is—we’ll get through it, okay?”

“I just love him so much.”

“I know you do.”

“That’s not what I mean. I got ahead of myself. I just—I knew I was setting myself up for this, you know? I knew what I was getting into after the first couple of dates. It was just fun at first, and then things started to get serious, and I realized we were heading in this direction. And it became more and more permanent. I kept telling myself I could handle it. This is who he is. What I’m signing up for. But here we are. I still can’t handle it.”

“I get it. You have a life together. You made a family. It’s not going to be easy.”

“I just wish he’d retire. He’s happy when he’s just tinkering with things, making things, learning. He doesn’t need to save the world every single time something is happening.”

“Maybe not. But he has access to resources that most people don’t. And he’s never been the kind of person who can sit back and let others handle everything. Not when he has the ability to do it himself. Besides, he never thinks anyone else will do it right.”

“God, what have I gotten myself into? What am I going to tell Bernie?”

“Well—the good news is that Bernie is a toddler. So thankfully, you don’t have to tell him anything.”

“And if Tony doesn’t come home?”

“He will, Clara. Just—give him time.” There was a knock on the wall separating my room from the living room. Graham appeared around the corner, looking frantic.

“Sorry to bother you guys,” he said. “But Clara, the press is going ape shit, and I don’t know how to handle this by myself. Also, apparently Dr. Banner is back. Steve Rogers just popped back up on the radar, and I think Vision is with him. Something big is happening.”

“Yeah, no shit! Tony is in fucking space!” she snapped, pointing at the news broadcast still on TV.

“She didn’t mean that,” I told him. “Don’t take it to heart.”

“No worries, dude. I’d be freaking out too. I just—I really don’t know what to do.” The poor kid looked at me desperately as if I could possibly help him. But Clara just dropped her head into her hands and sobbed again. I stood up to usher him back out of the room. “Also, May Parker keeps calling. She can’t find Peter, and she’s freaking out.”

“Shh—gimme a sec.” I pushed him out into the main living room beyond the glass so Clara couldn’t overhear.

“This shit is insane, Jo. Did you see the news?”

“Just now. I haven’t had much time to process it, though. Just—it’s a lot to put on her shoulders right now, okay? I know you’re not ready to handle this kind of press field day, but this isn’t just a company or a personality she represents. It’s her husband. She won’t be able to do this one on her own.”

“We’ve been getting nonstop calls from every major news organization. What am I supposed to tell them?”

“I don’t know. We’re doing the best we can to understand the situation. We’ll have more information when we have it. But this isn’t my area of expertise, Graham. Clara’s always been better at this kind of stuff than I was. I was a punch-first, ask-questions-later kind of kid. Consult her team. She hired them for a reason.” He slid his phone back into his pocket and ran his fingers through his hair.

“Yeah, but she hired me to manage them, and this is the first big thing I’ve had to deal with.”

“I hate to break it to you, but you represent Stark Industries. You’re going to have a lot of big things to deal with.”

“Ezra and I were supposed to have a date tonight. It’s our anniversary. He said he had something big planned.”

“I’m sure he’d understand if you have to take a rain check. Alien invasions are kind of a big deal. He’ll get it.”

“It still fucking sucks. I’m pretty sure he’s going to ask me to move in with him.”

“I know it sucks.” He took a deep breath to sort himself out. I couldn’t help with the actual PR job. But I could at least get his mind back on track.

“I’ll let you know if I hear anything from Rogers. I know you’re dying to ask. But whatever they’re doing, it’s bigger than us. So reaching out isn’t really a priority.”

“I understand. I’ll be patient. But if you hear anything about Bucky….”

“I’ll keep you updated.”

“I appreciate it.”

He left and I returned to my room, where Clara was still sobbing on my bed, watching the news feed looping. I snatched the remote out of her hand to shut it off.

“Graham is trying to handle it on his own,” I assured her. “You focus on you and Bernie for now, okay?” She sniffled into a tissue.

“What am I supposed to do?” she wailed. Then dropped herself back onto my bed.

“Please,” I begged as I watched her. “Please don’t make me watch her die.”