Jealous Orchard

"Hey, Bren!"

"Oh, hey, Morgan," I said spreading peanut butter on a piece of toast.

"I was wondering if you wanted to go out for ice cream with me?" she asked.

I could hear the smile in her voice as she waited for me to answer.

"You know, I can't. Sorry, I already made plans with Ryan, and he's probably going to be here any second," I said taking a bite of my toast.

It was silent for awhile and I heard her walk around.

"Oh, umm okay," she said.

Her voice sounded distant as if it wasn't her talking anymore. I could tell she was upset that I said no, but if I was to get over her I had to stop spending all my time with her.

"I'll talk to you later, alright?" I asked.

"Sure," she said right before she hung up.

I stared at the phone and wondered if she was really upset over me saying no.

I went through my address book and found Ryan's number and called him.

"Hey, man!" he said as he turned down the music in the background.

"You want to go catch a movie or something? I'm bored as hell."

"Oh, um," It sounded like he was turning off his car and opening a door, "I'm at Morgan's right now. She said she was going to call you?" he said closing the door.

I nearly choked on my food as he said that.

"Oh, you know I have to go," I said hanging up before he could answer.

I stared at my phone shocked. I had just screwed myself over. No wonder Morgan was acting strange. She knew I was lying. She must know I was avoiding her.

I was so tempted to call her and explain everything, but I was to nervous and I really didn't know what to say to her. She's probably was confused on why I was avoiding her. I stared at my phone as I tried to convince myself that she wouldn't be upset. But then I thought about how Morgan and Ryan were alone. They were probably listening to the Modest Mouse CD and talking about how much they get each other.

It made me sick to think that Ryan was in her room. I tried to watch TV to get my mind off the fact that I wanted to be there instead of Ryan. But I knew I could have if I wanted to, but I couldn't. I needed to stay away from Morgan.

She was my drug. She had become the only thing I thought about this summer. My thoughts always had her in them, and it felt like I was becoming obsessed with her. The worst part was she wasn't even mine to be obsessed with.

I couldn't help but wait for Ryan's call. I knew he would once he went home, but once it turned eight my heart kept beating faster and faster. I couldn't call Susan, because her mom had walked in on us one time we were getting a little heavy in her room, so Susan told me I shouldn't come by for a little while.

I was laying on my bed trying to fall asleep as my cell phone went off. I bolted from my spot and searched for my cell phone.

"Hello?" I answered not even looking at the caller ID.

"Hey, sweetie," Susan's voice filled my ear.

"Hey, Susan," I said sighing.

She most have mistaken my sigh for something else because she let out a giggle.

"I've missed you," she said.

"Yeah, it's been awhile," I said leaning back against my head board.

"What did you do today?" she asked. I could here her move in her bed, as if she was crawling under the covers.

"I just hung out, you know relaxed today," I said pulling my arm behind my head and resting on it.

"That's nice."

Her voice drifted and I could tell she had something to say.

"What are you thinking?" I asked laughing slightly as I imagined her smiling.

"Well, my mom and dad are leaving tomorrow morning, and I'll have my whole house to my lonesome," she said trailing off at the end.

"What time do you want me to come over?"

________________________

"I really need to go," I said.

Susan's lips were still attached to my chest as I reached for my t-shirt that hung over one of her bed posts.

"Stay a little longer," she pleaded.

Her hot breath sent chills down my moistened skin. I gently removed her from on top of me. I quickly pulled on my shirt and sighed to look at her. She giggled and then smiled at me.

"Your shirt is on backwards," she said pointing at me.

"Thanks," I muttered fixing it.

"Bye, Susan," I said kissing her and pulling away once her hands started to clamp onto my hair.

I knew if she got a hold of me I would never leave.

"I have to go," I said as she started to pout.

When I finally got out to my car I was already ten minutes late for band practice, and it would probably be another ten minutes before I get there.

I grunted in frustration for my phone dying on me, and tried to speed to Spencer's grandmother's house.

My family had finally had enough with band practices in my basement, and this was the only place we could practice. It was really nice that his grandma let us practice there, but it wasn't anything fancy we've wanted to rent.

When I finally got there I sprinted up the path to the house and didn't even bother knocking. I pushed the door open and quickly shut it before running down the stairs where the other three guys were.

"Well, look who finally decided to show," Brent said giving me an annoyed look.

"Sorry I'm late, I got caught up," I said trying to catch my breath from running into the house.

"Caught up in Susan's bed sheets? Man, you smell like spit," Spencer said looking at me disgusted.

"Sorry," I muttered not really knowing what to say.

"Whatever, you're here so we can start," Ryan said picking up his guitar and standing behind a mic stand to my right. I quickly walked behind my own stand and when I looked forward I was almost stunned.

The couch that Morgan had occupied for every band practice since the first one she came to was empty. Morgan wasn't here to watch.

"Where's Morgan?" I asked, but then I had remembered what had happened.

Ryan and I didn't talk about it, but I couldn't even look at him. I could feel his is on me, but I knew he was glaring.

"Well, I called her figuring you were picking her up and she was being a girl and that was the reason why you were late, but she said she was feeling under the weather, and couldn't make it," Spencer said from behind his drum set.

I glanced at him and then back at the empty seat.

Through the whole practice I kept telling myself she was really sick.

________________________

After practice I half expected Ryan to come up and confront me, and I kind of wanted him to. I wanted to know what Morgan said. But once we all went upstairs to get something to drink Ryan made up an excuse of having to leave. He left like a bat out of hell, and Spencer and Brent had no idea why.

He didn't want to tell me what happened with Morgan. Then the worst thought came to mind. What if Morgan likes Ryan? What if I just got myself replaced? And then I remember this was suppose to happen. Susan is suppose to replace my thoughts of Morgan, and I guess Ryan will be filling my spot.

"Hey you want to go out later?" Brent asked as we walked down the path together.

"No, I have to get this reading done," I said shaking my head, and ducking into my car.

Spencer and Brent both stood there with a worried face as I drove home.

I sat at a stop sign for a couple minutes as I decided if I should go right or keep going straight. If I went right I'd be driving down Morgan's street and I would know if Ryan was with her, but if I went straight I would just forget Morgan, and whenever she's with Ryan, I'll just ignore her.

A loud honk brought me out of my mind and I freaked quickly turning my wheel right and going down her street.

I almost wanted to turn around and not even go past her house but I was about four house back when I saw Ryan's car sitting in the driveway. Neither of them were outside, but Morgan's car wasn't there. I quickly drove past, hoping know one I noticed I was doing a drive by to check of their house.

When I got home I felt sick to my stomach and I knew I had become the worst person ever. I was never going to get Morgan out of my life, if I kept wishing she was still in it.

Walking into the kitchen I searched for something to eat or drink, and I groaned once I realized what I wanted.

The only thing I had a taste for was a Slurpin' Grape.

It was as if she was a parasite for my mind. Every time I felt like shit, I thought about her. Every time I was bored, I thought about her. Every time I was horny, I thought about her.

Basically she was on my mind all the time.