Of Life and Death
One
[ Present Time- April 11th, 2007 ]
I squinted at the sunlight that shone through the tiny window of my musty cell. I sat up from my standard-issue cot, and flicked my bangs out of my eyes. I was awoken by a bang from the main door leading to the cells.
“McCavenaugh, you got visitors” grunted the beefy guard that now stood on the opposite side of the metal bars.
I got up from the bed I sat on, and smoothed out the orange jumpsuit I was forced to wear. I walked out of my cell, the guard guiding me with my hands behind my back. I walked into the dining area where visiting hours were held from 12 o’clock pm until 3 o’clock pm. I was brought to a table with four chairs, two of which were already taken by my mother and brother, Chris. As soon as my mother saw me, she broke down into tears.
“You’ve got five minutes,” the guard said as I sat down. This was the first time my mother had come to visit me since I’d been taken into custody three days ago.
“Hey, Mom,” I said, wearily.
“Oh, Ally!” she went into hysterics, moving her hands to try to hold mine.
“You can’t touch her, miss,” the guard warned.
“Ally, how did this happen?” she asked. I paused, thinking about how I would answer that question.
“Mom, you don’t understand. It wasn’t—“ I started.
“I am so disappointed, young lady!” my mother cut me off. “You are twenty-one years old; you need to think about your actions! You can’t go around gallivanting on the streets, causing trouble whenever you want!”
“Ma, give her time to explain,” Chris said sternly, taking a hold on our mother’s hand, giving me a smile. I gave a small little smile back. Ah, Chris. So smart, so handsome. I looked up to him. He would be the only one I would miss.
“Mom, it really wasn’t my fault. I didn’t do anything!” I cried. Just as I was about to continue, the guard interrupted yet again.
“Time’s up,” he said. Without even giving me time to say goodbye, the guard pulled me up by the collar of my jumpsuit, leading me back to my cell.
As I lay in my bed earlier that evening, I did what I’ve been doing since I got here, which was basically the only thing I could do. I thought about the incident that landed me here, in this god-forsaken place. I let my mind wander, and it flashed back to the night this all started…
Flashback- Friday March 31st, 2007
“Hey, are you working tomorrow night?” Shellie asked me, as she stacked another book on the shelf in front of her. Shellie was my best friend, as well as a co-worker at Chapters, the local bookstore.
“Nope, I don’t think so. Why?” I replied, stacking more books.
“Because I want to take you out,” she said, quickly pulling her black hair into a ponytail.
“Out for what?” I asked, cocking an eyebrow.
“Your birthday, of course!” she exclaimed. I had been so busy these past few days that I had managed to forget my own birthday. I closed my eyes, and placed my palm to my forehead.
“Oh, yeah, right. So…where are we going, then?” I asked.
“It’s a surprise,” she replied matter-of-factly.
“Okay then,” I said and rolled my eyes.
[ Present Time- April 11th, 2007 ]
I was taken out of my daydream by the crackling of the P.A.
“All prisoners must report to the dining area immediately. Dinner will be served,” a voice said. The slamming of my cell door opening almost knocked me off the bed.
“Let’s go,” the same beefy guard from before said. He handcuffed me as I joined the line of prisoners walking to the dining hall. We all wore the same orange jumpsuit, hands cuffed behind our backs, walking with our heads down, at pretty much the same pace; we were like drones.
I waited in yet another line to get my food in the cafeteria. I was served a mixture of meat and spices in liquid form. With it came a small dinner roll and a few pieces of broccoli. The meat mixture didn’t even look edible, so I never ate it. I lived off three pieces of broccoli and a small piece of bread for dinner every night; I was loosing weight quickly. Now, I am a lot skinnier than I was, scrawny even. My hair hung in stringy strands, and I had dark circles around my eyes. As I buttered my bread, I realized that I had been given a plastic knife with no sharp edges; you wouldn’t have been able to slice butter. Is this what I had resorted to; a horrible place like this, where they didn’t even trust people with proper utensils during a meal? It was insane.
As I absent-mindedly chewed on my bread and broccoli, I thought about the trial that would take place tomorrow. My lawyer had already told me that if I were found guilty, I would be executed. But I shouldn’t worry; my lawyer is ‘fighting hard to win my case’. I could help but roll my eyes and stifle a laugh. Despite the fact that I really didn’t do anything, all evidence pointed to me. So I couldn’t help but think that I wouldn’t have much more time to live. Although residing in this prison could hardly be called living. I was only twenty-two years old, and I had so much to live for; so much I still wanted to do with my life. Right now, death for me just wasn’t an option. And to tell you the truth, I was scared. Besides feeling afraid, I couldn’t help but be outraged. I know what everyone thinks. They all think I’m guilty. I am surprised though, because they had found a lot of evidence linking me to the crime. But I knew I was innocent. I don’t know who did it, but it sure as heck wasn’t me. My word, obviously, just wasn’t enough.
I was now finished with my dinner, so I dumped the remaining food on my tray into the trash, and found a guard who would escort me to my cell. When I was in, he took off my handcuffs, and slammed the bars back into place. I lay back down on the bed, my thoughts taking over my body once again.
Flashback- Friday March 31st, 2007. After Work
“Chris, I’m home!” I called out as I stepped through the front door of the house my older brother and I shared, setting my keys down on the hall table.
“Hey,” he called back from the living room, where he was watching a made for TV movie.
I headed to the kitchen where I put a pot of water on the stove to make instant macaroni and cheese. Just as I poured the noodles into the now boiling water, Chris came into the kitchen.
“So, what are you doing later” he asked, leaning against the counter.
“Nothing, I’m just going to hang out here. Why?” I said, stirring the noodles.
“No reason. But a couple of the guys are coming over to watch the basketball game later,” he replied.
I knew most of his friends, so I replied, “Who?”
“The usual,” he replied. “Matt, Josh, John, and Andrew,”
My heart dropped into my stomach when he mentioned Andrew. Chris and he had been best friends since kindergarten and I knew him quite well; except that I’ve had a crush on him since I was eight. And Chris knew that I liked him too, so he always went out of his way to make me feel uncomfortable.
“Oh,” I replied simply. When dinner was ready, I quickly shoveled it into my mouth, and then cleaned up the dishes. I was sitting at the kitchen table reading the newspaper when the doorbell rang.
“That’ll be Andrew,” Chris said, running towards the door. My eyes shot out of my head, and I ran quickly upstairs to make myself look more presentable.
[ Present Time- April 12th, 2007 ]
My eyes sprung open, and I sat up in my bed. It was dark now; I must have fallen asleep. I squint my eyes at the clock that hung on the wall just outside my cell; it read 1:02 am. I groaned and lay back down, placing my palms over my eyes. I thought about the day Andrew came over. I remembered his face, his eyes, his laugh; everything about him. I thought about how, despite what the verdict was, I would never get to see Andrew again. I cried myself to sleep.
Flashback- Friday March 31st, 2007- The Guys are over.
“So, Andrew,” I started. I hadn’t seen him in a while. “What have you been up to?”
“Ah, nothing really. Just school and stuff,” he replied.
“Cool,” I said, looking around the room. Chris was still getting ready and the other guys hadn’t arrived yet. Things were awkward, and couldn’t get much worse. I realized I had spoken too soon, as Chris now entered the room with an indefinite smirk on his face.
“So Ally,” Chris said, glaring at me. “How long have you two been in love with each other? Fourteen, maybe fifteen years now?”
My face turned bright red, and Chris just laughed.
“Okay, well,” I said, trying my best to ignore Chris’ little remark. “How about some drinks?” I stood up and left the room as quickly as I could.
I was gathering cans of coke in the kitchen when I heard Andrew and Chris talking in the other room.
“Dude!” I heard Andrew say. “Why would you say that? Now she knows!” Knows what? I thought.
“Whatever,” Chris had said. “She thinks I’m talking about her like liking you, not the other way around!”
Then there was a silence. I took a long drink from the can I had just opened. I opened the fridge again, trying to busy myself.
“Ally?” I heard a voice say. I turned around and saw Andrew standing directly behind me; he was a mere inch away from my face. Soon that inch disappeared; out of nowhere, Andrew placed his lips on mine. We stood there for a few seconds, our lips just touching, until I started to kiss him back. After a minute or so, we parted; smiles on both our faces.
[ Present Time- April 12th, 2007- The Trial ]
“We have no further questions,” the lawyer said, sitting back down.
“Okay, Miss McCavenaugh, you may step down. I am authorizing a five minute recess while the juries come to their conclusion,” the judge said with a bang of her gavel. I got up and walked back to my seat next to the lawyer who was defending me. I already knew what the answer was going to be.
Flashback- Saturday April 1st, 2007- My Birthday
Ding Dong
It was mid afternoon, and Shellie was coming over to help me get ready for my birthday celebration tonight. I still didn’t know where she was taking me.
“Hey,” I said, opening the door.
“Hey, girl, happy birthday!” she said, pulling me into a hug.
“Thanks. I guess we should head upstairs though. This is going to take awhile,” I replied. Shellie just laughed.
“So who did you invite to this thing?” I asked, as we entered my room.
“Uhm, well there’s you and me. I invited a few other people from work, and a few of my girlfriends,” she said, sitting down on my bed.
“Alright, cool. Well I invited Chris and his best friend Andrew,” I said.
“Ooh, is this the Andrew that you’ve liked since forever?” she asked, giggling.
“Yeah, I guess,” I giggled, blushing slightly.
We spent the rest of the night doing our hair, and trying on different outfit combinations.
Finally we arrived at our destination. It was a new night club downtown, and everyone was meeting us there. After the guard at the door checked our I.D., we headed in and met up with everyone else, grabbing a couple beers on the way. Everyone was on the dance floor already, and so we headed over there. I ended up dancing right beside Andrew.
“Hey,” he shouted over the music. “Happy Birthday!”
“Thanks,” I said, smiling. A slow song came on, and everyone grabbed the person next to them. Coincidentally, I was standing next to Andrew. He pulled me into him, and we started swaying back and forth to the music.
Later throughout the night, after a lot of dancing, Andrew left to go get some fresh air. A few minutes later, I went to go find him, intending on lighting up a cigarette. When I went outside, I couldn’t spot Andrew. I leaned against the wall, hoping he’d gone to get something from his car. It was then I heard the scream that now haunts me.
[ Present Time- April 12th, 2007- The Execution ]
I had totally spaced out, and I barely heard the final verdict.
“Judge Mack, we find the defendant…guilty,” the head juror said.
My heart sank, and tears filled my eyes. My chest tightened, and I fought the urge to scream. I felt as if I couldn’t breathe.
“Bailiff, please take Miss McCavenaugh into the execution room,” the judge said to her assistant.
The man held me with my arms behind my back.
”Andrew?” I called out, hoping to get a response. I heard the scream again and ran to the alley beside the club.
“Andrew?” I called again, stopping at the entrance for a better look. I squinted my eyes through the darkness, trying my best to get a clear view.
I was brought into a room with one chair in it. I was told to sit down, and that I would be killed by lethal injection. The room was only big enough for me, the person giving the injection, and one more person, my mother. I was forced into the chair, and then strapped in.
I finally spotted him. I ran down the alley, screaming Andrew’s name. When I finally got to him, I knew I was too late. I screamed out.
“Okay, you will only feel a pinch,” the man with the needle said. As he brought it closer to my arm, a bead of sweat rolled down my forehead, my heart pounding in my ears.
I saw a gun lying next to him, and I picked it up. As soon as it registered in my head what it was, which was the murder weapon, I dropped the it, falling to the floor next to Andrew.
“Please, don’t leave me,” I said, tears flowing from my eyes. “I love you so much!”
I felt the needle go into my arm.
“Any last words?” he asked.
I soon heard sirens, and was thankful that someone had already called the police.
“Please, help my friend, officer!” I said, standing up from Andrew’s body, covered in his blood from his bleeding chest.
“I’m sorry,” I said. What I really wanted to say was ‘I hope you find the real bastard who did this’. My eyes fluttered shut; I was loosing consciousness.
As I approached the officer, I found myself being handcuffed, and shoved into the back of a police cruiser.
“You are under arrest for murder,” the officer said, driving away. Taking me farther away from the body of the man I loved.
I was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time. My sets of prints were the only ones they found on that gun, and I was covered in Andrew’s blood. I knew I didn’t do it though. And I pray for the person who did do it, because I knew that they would eventually get what they deserved. And it would be far worse than what I had experienced. In the beginning, I was scared. Of dying, I mean…but looking back on it, it was for the better. I had come to the realization, that on that night, when I picked up that gun and tried to help a friend, someone obviously had a better plan for me.
I squinted at the sunlight that shone through the tiny window of my musty cell. I sat up from my standard-issue cot, and flicked my bangs out of my eyes. I was awoken by a bang from the main door leading to the cells.
“McCavenaugh, you got visitors” grunted the beefy guard that now stood on the opposite side of the metal bars.
I got up from the bed I sat on, and smoothed out the orange jumpsuit I was forced to wear. I walked out of my cell, the guard guiding me with my hands behind my back. I walked into the dining area where visiting hours were held from 12 o’clock pm until 3 o’clock pm. I was brought to a table with four chairs, two of which were already taken by my mother and brother, Chris. As soon as my mother saw me, she broke down into tears.
“You’ve got five minutes,” the guard said as I sat down. This was the first time my mother had come to visit me since I’d been taken into custody three days ago.
“Hey, Mom,” I said, wearily.
“Oh, Ally!” she went into hysterics, moving her hands to try to hold mine.
“You can’t touch her, miss,” the guard warned.
“Ally, how did this happen?” she asked. I paused, thinking about how I would answer that question.
“Mom, you don’t understand. It wasn’t—“ I started.
“I am so disappointed, young lady!” my mother cut me off. “You are twenty-one years old; you need to think about your actions! You can’t go around gallivanting on the streets, causing trouble whenever you want!”
“Ma, give her time to explain,” Chris said sternly, taking a hold on our mother’s hand, giving me a smile. I gave a small little smile back. Ah, Chris. So smart, so handsome. I looked up to him. He would be the only one I would miss.
“Mom, it really wasn’t my fault. I didn’t do anything!” I cried. Just as I was about to continue, the guard interrupted yet again.
“Time’s up,” he said. Without even giving me time to say goodbye, the guard pulled me up by the collar of my jumpsuit, leading me back to my cell.
As I lay in my bed earlier that evening, I did what I’ve been doing since I got here, which was basically the only thing I could do. I thought about the incident that landed me here, in this god-forsaken place. I let my mind wander, and it flashed back to the night this all started…
Flashback- Friday March 31st, 2007
“Hey, are you working tomorrow night?” Shellie asked me, as she stacked another book on the shelf in front of her. Shellie was my best friend, as well as a co-worker at Chapters, the local bookstore.
“Nope, I don’t think so. Why?” I replied, stacking more books.
“Because I want to take you out,” she said, quickly pulling her black hair into a ponytail.
“Out for what?” I asked, cocking an eyebrow.
“Your birthday, of course!” she exclaimed. I had been so busy these past few days that I had managed to forget my own birthday. I closed my eyes, and placed my palm to my forehead.
“Oh, yeah, right. So…where are we going, then?” I asked.
“It’s a surprise,” she replied matter-of-factly.
“Okay then,” I said and rolled my eyes.
[ Present Time- April 11th, 2007 ]
I was taken out of my daydream by the crackling of the P.A.
“All prisoners must report to the dining area immediately. Dinner will be served,” a voice said. The slamming of my cell door opening almost knocked me off the bed.
“Let’s go,” the same beefy guard from before said. He handcuffed me as I joined the line of prisoners walking to the dining hall. We all wore the same orange jumpsuit, hands cuffed behind our backs, walking with our heads down, at pretty much the same pace; we were like drones.
I waited in yet another line to get my food in the cafeteria. I was served a mixture of meat and spices in liquid form. With it came a small dinner roll and a few pieces of broccoli. The meat mixture didn’t even look edible, so I never ate it. I lived off three pieces of broccoli and a small piece of bread for dinner every night; I was loosing weight quickly. Now, I am a lot skinnier than I was, scrawny even. My hair hung in stringy strands, and I had dark circles around my eyes. As I buttered my bread, I realized that I had been given a plastic knife with no sharp edges; you wouldn’t have been able to slice butter. Is this what I had resorted to; a horrible place like this, where they didn’t even trust people with proper utensils during a meal? It was insane.
As I absent-mindedly chewed on my bread and broccoli, I thought about the trial that would take place tomorrow. My lawyer had already told me that if I were found guilty, I would be executed. But I shouldn’t worry; my lawyer is ‘fighting hard to win my case’. I could help but roll my eyes and stifle a laugh. Despite the fact that I really didn’t do anything, all evidence pointed to me. So I couldn’t help but think that I wouldn’t have much more time to live. Although residing in this prison could hardly be called living. I was only twenty-two years old, and I had so much to live for; so much I still wanted to do with my life. Right now, death for me just wasn’t an option. And to tell you the truth, I was scared. Besides feeling afraid, I couldn’t help but be outraged. I know what everyone thinks. They all think I’m guilty. I am surprised though, because they had found a lot of evidence linking me to the crime. But I knew I was innocent. I don’t know who did it, but it sure as heck wasn’t me. My word, obviously, just wasn’t enough.
I was now finished with my dinner, so I dumped the remaining food on my tray into the trash, and found a guard who would escort me to my cell. When I was in, he took off my handcuffs, and slammed the bars back into place. I lay back down on the bed, my thoughts taking over my body once again.
Flashback- Friday March 31st, 2007. After Work
“Chris, I’m home!” I called out as I stepped through the front door of the house my older brother and I shared, setting my keys down on the hall table.
“Hey,” he called back from the living room, where he was watching a made for TV movie.
I headed to the kitchen where I put a pot of water on the stove to make instant macaroni and cheese. Just as I poured the noodles into the now boiling water, Chris came into the kitchen.
“So, what are you doing later” he asked, leaning against the counter.
“Nothing, I’m just going to hang out here. Why?” I said, stirring the noodles.
“No reason. But a couple of the guys are coming over to watch the basketball game later,” he replied.
I knew most of his friends, so I replied, “Who?”
“The usual,” he replied. “Matt, Josh, John, and Andrew,”
My heart dropped into my stomach when he mentioned Andrew. Chris and he had been best friends since kindergarten and I knew him quite well; except that I’ve had a crush on him since I was eight. And Chris knew that I liked him too, so he always went out of his way to make me feel uncomfortable.
“Oh,” I replied simply. When dinner was ready, I quickly shoveled it into my mouth, and then cleaned up the dishes. I was sitting at the kitchen table reading the newspaper when the doorbell rang.
“That’ll be Andrew,” Chris said, running towards the door. My eyes shot out of my head, and I ran quickly upstairs to make myself look more presentable.
[ Present Time- April 12th, 2007 ]
My eyes sprung open, and I sat up in my bed. It was dark now; I must have fallen asleep. I squint my eyes at the clock that hung on the wall just outside my cell; it read 1:02 am. I groaned and lay back down, placing my palms over my eyes. I thought about the day Andrew came over. I remembered his face, his eyes, his laugh; everything about him. I thought about how, despite what the verdict was, I would never get to see Andrew again. I cried myself to sleep.
Flashback- Friday March 31st, 2007- The Guys are over.
“So, Andrew,” I started. I hadn’t seen him in a while. “What have you been up to?”
“Ah, nothing really. Just school and stuff,” he replied.
“Cool,” I said, looking around the room. Chris was still getting ready and the other guys hadn’t arrived yet. Things were awkward, and couldn’t get much worse. I realized I had spoken too soon, as Chris now entered the room with an indefinite smirk on his face.
“So Ally,” Chris said, glaring at me. “How long have you two been in love with each other? Fourteen, maybe fifteen years now?”
My face turned bright red, and Chris just laughed.
“Okay, well,” I said, trying my best to ignore Chris’ little remark. “How about some drinks?” I stood up and left the room as quickly as I could.
I was gathering cans of coke in the kitchen when I heard Andrew and Chris talking in the other room.
“Dude!” I heard Andrew say. “Why would you say that? Now she knows!” Knows what? I thought.
“Whatever,” Chris had said. “She thinks I’m talking about her like liking you, not the other way around!”
Then there was a silence. I took a long drink from the can I had just opened. I opened the fridge again, trying to busy myself.
“Ally?” I heard a voice say. I turned around and saw Andrew standing directly behind me; he was a mere inch away from my face. Soon that inch disappeared; out of nowhere, Andrew placed his lips on mine. We stood there for a few seconds, our lips just touching, until I started to kiss him back. After a minute or so, we parted; smiles on both our faces.
[ Present Time- April 12th, 2007- The Trial ]
“We have no further questions,” the lawyer said, sitting back down.
“Okay, Miss McCavenaugh, you may step down. I am authorizing a five minute recess while the juries come to their conclusion,” the judge said with a bang of her gavel. I got up and walked back to my seat next to the lawyer who was defending me. I already knew what the answer was going to be.
Flashback- Saturday April 1st, 2007- My Birthday
Ding Dong
It was mid afternoon, and Shellie was coming over to help me get ready for my birthday celebration tonight. I still didn’t know where she was taking me.
“Hey,” I said, opening the door.
“Hey, girl, happy birthday!” she said, pulling me into a hug.
“Thanks. I guess we should head upstairs though. This is going to take awhile,” I replied. Shellie just laughed.
“So who did you invite to this thing?” I asked, as we entered my room.
“Uhm, well there’s you and me. I invited a few other people from work, and a few of my girlfriends,” she said, sitting down on my bed.
“Alright, cool. Well I invited Chris and his best friend Andrew,” I said.
“Ooh, is this the Andrew that you’ve liked since forever?” she asked, giggling.
“Yeah, I guess,” I giggled, blushing slightly.
We spent the rest of the night doing our hair, and trying on different outfit combinations.
Finally we arrived at our destination. It was a new night club downtown, and everyone was meeting us there. After the guard at the door checked our I.D., we headed in and met up with everyone else, grabbing a couple beers on the way. Everyone was on the dance floor already, and so we headed over there. I ended up dancing right beside Andrew.
“Hey,” he shouted over the music. “Happy Birthday!”
“Thanks,” I said, smiling. A slow song came on, and everyone grabbed the person next to them. Coincidentally, I was standing next to Andrew. He pulled me into him, and we started swaying back and forth to the music.
Later throughout the night, after a lot of dancing, Andrew left to go get some fresh air. A few minutes later, I went to go find him, intending on lighting up a cigarette. When I went outside, I couldn’t spot Andrew. I leaned against the wall, hoping he’d gone to get something from his car. It was then I heard the scream that now haunts me.
[ Present Time- April 12th, 2007- The Execution ]
I had totally spaced out, and I barely heard the final verdict.
“Judge Mack, we find the defendant…guilty,” the head juror said.
My heart sank, and tears filled my eyes. My chest tightened, and I fought the urge to scream. I felt as if I couldn’t breathe.
“Bailiff, please take Miss McCavenaugh into the execution room,” the judge said to her assistant.
The man held me with my arms behind my back.
”Andrew?” I called out, hoping to get a response. I heard the scream again and ran to the alley beside the club.
“Andrew?” I called again, stopping at the entrance for a better look. I squinted my eyes through the darkness, trying my best to get a clear view.
I was brought into a room with one chair in it. I was told to sit down, and that I would be killed by lethal injection. The room was only big enough for me, the person giving the injection, and one more person, my mother. I was forced into the chair, and then strapped in.
I finally spotted him. I ran down the alley, screaming Andrew’s name. When I finally got to him, I knew I was too late. I screamed out.
“Okay, you will only feel a pinch,” the man with the needle said. As he brought it closer to my arm, a bead of sweat rolled down my forehead, my heart pounding in my ears.
I saw a gun lying next to him, and I picked it up. As soon as it registered in my head what it was, which was the murder weapon, I dropped the it, falling to the floor next to Andrew.
“Please, don’t leave me,” I said, tears flowing from my eyes. “I love you so much!”
I felt the needle go into my arm.
“Any last words?” he asked.
I soon heard sirens, and was thankful that someone had already called the police.
“Please, help my friend, officer!” I said, standing up from Andrew’s body, covered in his blood from his bleeding chest.
“I’m sorry,” I said. What I really wanted to say was ‘I hope you find the real bastard who did this’. My eyes fluttered shut; I was loosing consciousness.
As I approached the officer, I found myself being handcuffed, and shoved into the back of a police cruiser.
“You are under arrest for murder,” the officer said, driving away. Taking me farther away from the body of the man I loved.
I was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time. My sets of prints were the only ones they found on that gun, and I was covered in Andrew’s blood. I knew I didn’t do it though. And I pray for the person who did do it, because I knew that they would eventually get what they deserved. And it would be far worse than what I had experienced. In the beginning, I was scared. Of dying, I mean…but looking back on it, it was for the better. I had come to the realization, that on that night, when I picked up that gun and tried to help a friend, someone obviously had a better plan for me.