What It Takes

I flooded my brother's shirt in tears, in fear of what the doctor might say. "No, he's not dead, but he could've been. The good news is that he alive but the bad news is that he has an overwhelming amount of alcohol poisoning that almost caused him to lose his liver." The doctor said dreadfully. "Oh God!" I waled out as Matt hugged me secure. "He is able to take visitors one at a time now, but he's sleeping so be very quiet and respectful." I looked up with a tear stained face and stood. I didn't even check to see if anyone else wanted to go first; I got up and walked to the room that Zack was in. He was laying in his hospital bed paler than the dead, well he practically looked dead. I pulled a sit right up beside his bed and held and kissed his hand. "I'm so sorry, if i hadn't caused that stupid fight, you probably would have never been in this situation." I whispered knowing he was sleeping. "Baby I love you more than life and I can't forgive myself; This is all my fault." I cried as I kissed his forehead and laid my head on his chest lightly.

I felt his grip on my hand strengthen. His eyelids cracked slightly open allowing me to see the gem-like color of his eyes. "Zack?" I said lightly as I wiped my overflowing tears. "Don't you ever...." He said but stopped his words to swallow his saliva. "Don't you ever say it's your fault again." He whispered as he held my hand to his heart. "Bu.... Zack, I'm so sorry! I was so worried, I thought you were dead. The doctor said you could've died and that you almost lost your liver." I spoke softly as I stroked his hair off of his forehead. He closed his eyes and then after a few seconds, opened them slowly again. "He said you have a major case of alcohol poisoning, but I don't understand how you..... I mean you don't drink like every fucking hour." I said as I noticed him look into my eyes as if he were trying to find something. "I did....." He trailed off. "You did what?" I questioned. "When we got in that huge fight, I drank so fucking much. I wanted to take my mind off of you because It was killing me inside knowing that I hurt your feelings. So I turned to drinking; I drank so fucking much that I couldn't stand or talk or even open my eyes. The guys knew, but I told them not to tell you because I didn't want you worried." He sounded so ashamed. I laid my head on his chest again and broke down with tears. I was getting really fucking tired of crying! "Baby, don't cry! Shhhhh it's okay." he said passionately. He was so selfless.

We sat there in silence for almost an hour until everyone else came in to see him. I didn't know what to say, and I didn't want to say anything to him while he was feeling horrible because part of me wanted to cuss him out for drinking like that, while the other part of me just wanted to fast forward everything. Everyone laughed and comforted Zack for hours and then the doctor came in. "So Mr. Zachary Baker, is able to go home tonight, but there are many restrictions that must be obeyed." He said loudly. "Yes sir." I said. "He must have No alcohol for at least two months because his system has to cleanse, No Physical work for at least a week or two, so just keep him in bed. Oh and he must come back, twice a week for the next 3 weeks to get checked up on." The doctor commanded strictly. The doctor cut me a father like look, one that I had seen from my on father many of times. "When I say physical work that also means no sex."

Everyone in the room busted out into laughter, which was really embarrassing. "Now follow those rules and YOU won't be laying in that hospital bed again Mr. Baker." The doctor said as he pointed at Zack. I gave Matt my keys so he could ride over to Brian's house with Val. to get my car so I could take Zack home. When they came back to the hospital with my car, we had to wheel Zacky out to the car in a wheelchair. Everyone else road back to Brian's house to clean up and make sure everyone had left from the party earlier. The whole car ride, I spoke not one word. It was incredible awkward but i didn't care. I had no words for him. Of course I was glad that he was alive but I was just so fucking livid that he word turn to alcohol like that. We pulled into our driveway and I wheeled him into the house, and helped him up the stairs to our bedroom. He laid in bed as I took my jacket up and hung it in the closet. "You're being oddly quiet." He said weakly. I looked at him and nodded my head, yes. I was actually a little hurt that he would just do something so stupid. I got dressed in his old Misfits shirt and a pair of soffee's, and got in bed. I laid at the other side of the bed as far as I could without falling off.

Yeah, yeah I'm sounding like a bitch, but I was completely lost at words. He rolled over closer to me and pulled me tight in his arms. It felt Iike he had regained all of his strength. "Mel. say something to me, anything." He said as he stroked my arm. I turned over on my side so I faced him, and said nothing. " We'll talk tomorrow, I don't feel like speaking right now." I finally whispered. He looked in my eyes and whispered 'I love you.' I responded by just nodding and giving him a kiss.