Just Say Anything

August first had arrived which meant I was only in Maryland for three more weeks, I would have to return to Washington on the twenty second. I didn't even want to think about leaving, I would be leaving so many good things behind, more than what I left to come here in the first place. When I left for here, I left my family and Cheyenne and a past I want to forget, when I leave for Washington, I am leaving my family, Alex, Rian, Brie, Kara, and not to mention Zach, the best thing that has happened in quite awhile. Just thinking about having such a short time left made me want to curl up in bed forever.

I realized just moments after I woke up that Zach returned home late last night, he was back. A smile crept it's way onto my face and I quickly got dressed in an outfit that I thought was cute: I wanted to impress him. When I came downstairs I saw Alex sitting on the couch next to Jack, he looked at me and smirked knowingly, to which I smacked him lightly as I walked behind him. He gave me a dirty look, I feigned confusion and sat down next to my cousin.

"Hey Jack attack," I said. "What's on the agenda for today?"

"Going to the park with the guys and the girls."

"For cereal?" I asked. "When?"

"Soon, are you going to go get dressed first?"

"Jack, dear, I am dressed."

"No, you wore that to bed yesterday."

"Jack I wore a nightgown to bed last night. Right now I am wearing jeans shirts and a spaghetti strap tank top."

"Either way you're showing too much skin, go change!"

"No!" I said, pointedly sitting down. "I am perfectly fine, I am wearing more clothes than I would swimming Jack, I can always go put my swimsuit on."

"Fine, wear what you're going to wear, but I am not going to be happy about it."

"Jack, I don't think Addie cares if you'll be happy about it. Just as long as other people are."

"Thank you Alex!" I exclaimed.

"Stupid perverts are going to look at you." Jack muttered.

"If stupid perverts do look at me, I give you permission to beat them up."

"Trust Me Addison Sophie, I would beat them up even if I didn't have your permission."

I just shook my head and turned my attention to the show Alex and Jack had been watching; Hannah Montana. They shot me death glares when I started laughing about them watching a little girls' show, although, I watch it too. This show was pretty funny at times and I squealed when they mentioned going to a Panic at the Disco concert - quite honestly that would have made my day if Zach hadn't came back today. I was a little scared about what would happen today to be truthful, questions filled my head: How would he greet me? Do I look to trashy? Did he find someone better while he was away and realize I'm not good enough? My insecurities left over from James were being brought out full force too: I'm too fat, my make-up isn't good enough, my hair is ugly, I'm ugly! There was no happy thought in my mind right now, I felt like screaming, I felt like passing out, I felt like throwing up, my anxiety was getting the best of me; I took a few breaths struggling to stay conscious. Luckily for me neither Jack or Alex noticed I was having difficulties.

Awhile later, the three of us left early for the park, if I was nervous before I would need to make a whole new word to describe how I was feeling now. I don't know why I am feeling the way I am, if I had to guess it would be because Zach is genuinely a nice guy and wants me, not for pleasuring his sexual needs either, and I like that. Apparently Alex had noticed that I was apprehensive because he started whispering in my ear that everything would be okay, I would have nothing to worry about. Jack was oblivious, which was weird, he almost always knew when I was feeling down, he had always been able to do that. The first thing I did when we reached the park was race over to the swing set and sit down, Alex and Jack followed behind slowly.

"Still love the swing sets, eh, Ad?"

"Swings rule Jack."

"That they do." He said. "Wouldn't it suck if everybody forgot to come here?"

"Jack, for the love of Blink 182 please don't start."

"You are no fun Alex-y!"

"I am plenty fun Jacky, I just would rather not hear you go on a "Wouldn't it suck if" craze right now."

"Addie loves that though."

"No." I said. "I really don't."

"I thought you loved that!"

"Not at all dear cousin," I laughed, "Now if you look the other way maybe Brie will keep you occupied."

"Oh my god everybody is here!" Jack screeched.

Jack practically mauled Brie and she hopped on his back for a ride, she's a smart girl. Rian and Kara sat on the monkey bars and hung from their knees. Then there were three: Alex, Zach, and me. Alex tactfully went over to talk with Rian and Kara, leaving Zach and me alone, or as alone as we could be. Zach smiled and walked closer to me, hugging me and then kissed me softly, it was as if a thousand butterflies just suddenly appeared in my stomach. He backed away and sat on the swing next to mine and we both looked into the faces of our friends' shocked faces (except Alex, who was laughing).

"See Addison," Jack hissed protectively. "I told you perverts would want you."

He looked as if he wanted to kill Zach right now so I intervened before anyone got hurt, "Jack, I'm dating him!"

"What the fuck, and you didn't have the decency to tell me?"

"No," I mumbled.

"Since when?" Brie asked, looking pissed but also happy.

"A few days ago." Zack replied awkwardly. "At the party, while you guys got drunk I stayed sober."

"And you guys didn't tell us?" Jack shouted.

"Actually, I knew." Alex piped up.

"Alex knew before me?" he said crossly.

The pressure was getting to me, I started to stutter and shake, I couldn't take all the yelling, it reminded me of when James would get mad and hit me. Alex tried to calm Jack down, saying how worried I was about if Jack found out and I was going to tell him today, with Zach and he only knew because he showed me something he had never shown anyone before and I felt like I had to say something back. We all stood, or sat, there silently, just looking at each other before Brie started to laugh.

"Kara you owe me ten bucks!"

"Excuse me?" Zach said.

"Well, you see, Kara and I saw chemistry on you two. Kara thought you guys would get together the last week Addie would be here, but I thought it would be earlier. Therefore, I just won."

"Damn it!" Kara swore. "I'll give it to you later, I'm broke today."

"Remember I know where you live!"

"Stalker much?" Rian asked.

"Can we get back to the situation!" Jack yelled.

I held tightly onto the chain holding the swing and closed my eyes, hoping that when I opened them it would all be all right. But when I opened them Jack still looked pissed and I visibly started to shake.

"Jack," Zach said slowly. "Back of man. Look at what you're doing!"

My cousin looked at me and his eyes immediately softened, he walked over to me and gave me a big hug. "If you want to date him, date him. But if he hurts you he will be hurt."

"Okay, Jack."

"Come on," Zach muttered to me. "We'll be right back."

We disappeared to the other end of the playground where he sat down and I next to him. I rested my head on his shoulder and he smoothed my hair down.

"Why didn't you tell them we were dating?"

"I wanted to wait to make sure it was okay…"

"Of course it's okay Addie, I don't like secret relationships."

"Me neither."

He kissed me and then we walked hand in hand back to everybody else. It was a hilarious scene to lay eyes on: Rian, Kara, and Alex were hanging upside down on monkey bars, making weird faces and Brie was playing hopscotch while Jack was trying to swing over the top bar. I laughed and sat down on the ground, Zach followed my lead.

"Finally you two are back!" Alex shouted. "I thought you guys would be gone forever!"

"Al, we weren't even gone five minutes." I pointed out.

"So?"

"You are so weird Alex Gaskarth."

"At least I'm not dating Merrick."

"At least I can get a boyfriend."

"I could get one, if I wanted to."

"But you won't." Rian said.

"That is right."

I laughed loudly, trying to stifle my laughter behind my hand, a habit of mine. Zach pulled my hand away and kissed me. Alex being immature covered his eyes. I really couldn't wait for Cheyenne to come up here, she would have been doing the same thing, they really are perfect for each other. Jack grabbed my hand and challenged me to a hopscotch challenge. He thought for sure that he could beat me. He didn't.