Well If You Wanted Honesty, I'll Let You Know Just What I'm Feeling

My life is shit! I cant live this anymore!

This is what I thought as I ran up to my room and went through my bedside table looking for that sweet piece of metal that would bring me out of my misery.

Got it!

I sat down in the corner of my room, no one was home, no one would be able to hear my screams of pain.

I put the cold razor to my wrist and pressed down on the skin slowly, eventually the skin broke and the liquid color of rubies began to slowly dribble from my skin. I cried out as I began to slowly bring my hand down my arm along with the razor, making the cut deeper and longer.

I stopped because I was starting to feel weak in the head. The blood was flowing out, won’t be long now.

I was just about to past when a figure stepped into my room making me flinch.

I couldn’t really see the figure so I decided to just ignore it and try to get to hell faster.

“I thought I told you not to do this.” A voice called out. I opened my eyes and standing in front of me was none other then Gerard Way himself, the lead singer of one of my favorite bands, My Chemical Romance.

“Why would you do this to me April?” He asked.

“You don’t even know me! You can’t tell me what and what not to do!” I yelled at him.

“You really don’t need to do this.” He softly said.

“I’m worthless, I have nothing.” I shuttered

Gerard came towards me and sat by my side, he brought his hand over my wound, and to my surprise it vanished. Whoa….I was not expecting that.

“That’s not true.” Gerard whispered to me. “I want you to look over there at your closet, do you see what I see?”

I looked over and saw eyes that were filled with fear, the eyes belonged to my younger sister.

“Julia?” I called.

“She can’t hear you right now, time has stopped at the moment.” He said to me. “Your sister adores you and cares about you. You are her idol. Now do you really want her to see this?” He asked.

“Of course not, but my life isn’t going anywhere, I have no where else to go except the deep depths of the Devil’s eyes.” I whispered back to him, tears starting to roll down my cheeks.

“I remember when I was your age, highschool was shit for me. I was thinking the same things you were. But what if I can tell you that I know your life will go to far places?” he smiled down at me.

“I would say your crazy.”

“Ah but I am crazy! Now what I want you to do is close your eyes and think of nothing.” He stated.

Might as well. I closed my eyes and relaxed my mind, then I felt a cool touch on my shoulder, pictures started going through my head.

One picture was me and my friend Alyssa rocking out at some concert. Another picture came through, it was of me getting my highschool degree, wow I thought I would never get that. Another picture was me in front of a huge crowed, it looked like I was singing. The touch from my shoulder went away and my mind was back to the present.

“Whoa, but how do you know all of this?” I wondered out loud.

“Well it not set in stone, you just got to live life as it is.” He told me.

“Well that’s a little hard for me at the moment.” I whispered.

“Its true life can suck, but many events will come in your life, you just need to give them time to come to you.” Gerard rubbed my back. “Just listen to me please, your life will get better. Just keep working hard and talk to someone if you’re having troubles, okay?”

“Fine, I’ll try. But I have a question.”

“What?”

“How the hell did you get here?”

He just looked at me and laughed. “Goodbye April, can’t wait to see you at the concert.” He smiled then disappeared.

The room started to spin then I found myself outside my room in front of my door.

“What the fuck?” I asked myself.

I looked down at my arm and there was no scare or any trace of blood.

Strange.

I entered my room and went to my bedside table looking for the razor. It was there, right where I left it. I picked it up then went to my window and threw it out into which ever yard it went to.

I sat back on my bed and gathered my thoughts. Had this been real? Then I remembered something.

I went to my closet door and saw my younger sister going through my clothes.

“Julia, what are you doing?”

She jumped in the air and turned around. “When did you get here!?” She asked.

“Just now, what do you need?”

“Can I borrow your red tie? I’m going to a party tonight and wanted to wear it.”

“Oh fine sure.”

“Thanks Ape!” She hugged me then went back to her search for the tie.

After she left I started gathering my thoughts again.

I guess I do just have to wait, life come will as it goes.