Sorrow Swallows My Screams

Chapter Four

Chapter Four:

Zacky’s POV:

I arrived at the park, but couldn’t see anyone. I took a seat on a flaky wooden seat and waited. There was something about the flaky wood that reminded me of the bridge. The bridge. Mikey, Mikey, Mikey. I felt a hot tear run down my face and made no effort to stop it, even though it made my eyes sting even more. More tears continued to flow until I heard a voice pierce the eerie silence.

“Zacky?” it asked. I looked up to see the calming face of Brian. Calming? I have no idea why, it just… is. I quickly moved my hands from my lap and made a furious effort to wipe away my tears before Brian noticed I was crying.

“Zacky, don’t, it’s okay,” Brian said, sitting down on the wooden bench. It creaked with his weight - not that he was really heavy or anything, this was a very old a creaky bench to begin with, and probably not fit to hold two people in this day and age - and he took my hands away from my face. He wrapped his two hands around mine and moved in closer to me. I buried my head into his chest and just cried. And cried. And cried. I cried until I had no tears left. Brian was great; not once did he show a sign of impatience, though we must have been sitting there for several hours until I’d finally stopped the waterworks. The plumber had been called (That being Brian) and the waterworks (That would be my tears) fixed. Put a plug in, at least.

It was then that we talked, consuming another few hours. I told him everything. About my parents. About my attempted suicide. About Mikey. When I began talking about Mikey again I somehow found some more tears, but they ceased rather quickly, with Brian stroking my hair lightly.

“Do you wanna come back to my place for the night?” He asked randomly. I nodded quickly. Any chance away from home I was up for. “Come on,” He beckoned for me to stand up, as he did.

We walked through the dry, humid night, growing sticky with sweat as we manoeuvred through the streets. As we neared his house, he took a hold of my hand again. I looked over at his stunning face and he gave me a warm smile. I smiled back, as strongly as I could. I didn’t think I did a very convincing job though.

We stepped up the three steps onto his porch, and he grabbed the hide-a-key and unlocked the front door. We snuck in quietly, and he locked the door behind us.

The house was nice. That was a pretty fair assumption, even though I’d only so far seen the entrance. We entered the main living area and I saw a man sitting on the soft and comfortable looking dark green couch.

My God, did it look comfortable.

“Hey, dad,” Brian said, standing close to me. So close to me that it sent a chill down my spine… for some… unknown… reason… “This is Zacky.”

I raised a hand, and waved. “H-hi,” I choked out.

“Hi! What a pleasure it is to meet you, Zacky!” Brian’s dad said. He extended a hand, which I reached out and shook.

“You too.” I gave him one of those nice-to-meet-you fake smiles. What? It’s not like I ever smile for real anymore.

“Are you Junior’s new boyfriend?” his dad asked. What?

“Dad!” Brian said quickly, his cheek rapidly turning a bright shade of red.

“What?” his father asked, and a few seconds later added, “You haven’t told him you’re gay yet?”

“No, dad.” Brian looked very embarrassed. He rubbed the back of his neck with his hand, and then did the same to his arm. He was redder than I’d ever seen anyone before. But my mind was pretty much filled with a whole lot of thoughts regarding what I’d just heard. He was gay.I was gay. Did that mean anything?

Shut up, of course not.

I wasn’t clear of my feelings about him… sure, he was pretty cute… and nice… and he has a nice ass, and I like him in that way, but I feel like I’m betraying Mikey.Not good.

“Being gay is nothing to be ashamed of, son,” Brian’s dad continued. I want this guy to be my dad.

“I know,” Brian said. Seriously, how great would it be to have this guy as your dad? And no, I don’t know his name yet… “I’m gonna show Zacky around the rest of the house.”

Brian looked at me. He looked a little more relaxed now. His face was about half as red as it was, so it was still very red, just not as red. He showed me through the rest of the house and my first impression of it was right, it was a very nice house. After we’d completed the tour except for Brian’s bedroom, I followed Brian in his room. It was messy, like mine. The bed was the only thing nice and neat.

“Nice bed,” I said. I then realised how that could have been interpreted. “I didn’t mean-” I cut myself off, ending my words.

“Yeah, I know.” He smiled. “It’s pretty messy.” He was referring to his room again, now. Not my bad choice of words that could imply something that I didn’t want to be implied.

“Like mine.” He smiled wider when I said that.

“Yeah… my dad’s always telling me to clean it.”

“My parents don’t care,” I said, mumbling what I said next, “About anything to do with me.” His grin vanished and he looked like he regretted saying his last sentence. “It’s okay.”

“No, I’m sorry,” he said. “And I’m sorry about my dad… I hope he didn’t make you feel uncomfortable at all.”

“Are you kidding? He’s great, he doesn’t care that you’re gay! I would kill for that! Besides, you looked like you were a lot more uncomfortable than I was.”

He blushed again. “Yeah… I guess I was.”

We just hung out in his room for a few hours, talking, learning things about each other. This conversation was a lot more pleasant than the one we’d had at the park. This one was a lot happier.

After running out of things to say, we decided we’d turn on the TV. We began watching a movie that had just started; The Ring.

Everything scares me in movies. I’m such a girl. About three quarters of the way through the movie, Brian noticed just how scared I was. We were lying on his bed, and he moved closer to me, wrapping an arm around me. I genuinely smiled, and he saw, and smiled too.

We stayed like that until the movie ended and we both fell asleep, me wrapped in his arms.