S'Agapo

I quickly wiped my eyes and sniffled. It was too late to recover properly, so I just stared at him.

"Laurel, I was just about to leave, but...uh...I guess I kind of have to tell you now..."

"What?"

"Can we go for a walk?" He looked as if he knew I was going to say no, but I wanted to hear him out. Maybe then, we could finally end this relationship properly. Seeing as last June it had ended with me throwing the phone across the room, breaking it. I turned to Apollo, who just stared at me. I grabbed my coat and shut the door.

"Fine."

As we walked, Kevin tried to hold my hand. I pulled away and crossed my arms.

"I wanted to ask you if you really hated me." Kevin looked at the ground. His eyes were blank.

"No." I sighed. "I don't hate you Kevin. Everyone follows their own path, and sometimes it hurts others, but there's no real reason to hold a grudge against someone unless they've really messed up."

"But, but I did seriously mess up! I broke up with you the day after your parents died!"

I smiled up at him. "But you didn't know that they were dead, you hadn't done it purposely."

Kevin looked away. "I remember your face when I told you that I was moving to Florida, after we'd been together three years. And when I told you that I had another girlfriend there, you just...I'm sorry."

I bit my lip and closed my eyes. "I lost all trust in you in that moment. It hurt, but I'm fine now. How is your girlfriend?"

"She dumped me."

I laughed. "Karma's fun, isn't it?"

"Hey!" He pushed me playfully. I stuck my tongue out at him, but almost immediately after composed myself again. "So, why'd you come back here?"

"Because dad said that I could come back. I'm nineteen, you know."

"Of course I know that! We celebrated your birthday remember?" I shivered from the wind. "Did you even want to go to Florida?"

"Not really, but then again, I did have a girlfriend there. But when she broke up with me, I realized that I had made a mistake and was hoping that maybe you would take me back."

"Well, aren't you stupid."

He smiled a little. "I know, how pathetic. I was just hoping that maybe you would still love me, and, maybe you would be willing to take me back, even with my discrepancies."

"I'll let you in on a little secret, even though I have no idea why I'm telling you."

"What is it?"

We stopped and I turned to look at him. "Kevin, I...I still love you. A little."

His face lit up and he attempted to wrap his arms around me. I backed away, shaking my head. "But, I can't be with you. You hurt me too badly, and I've become smarter. I'm not going to be with you ever again, Kevin, so please, just stop coming after me. Stop talking to me; I don't want
anything to do with you anymore. We have to make this break as clean as possible."

"How can it be a clean cut when we'll see each other everyday? I still love you too Laurel!"

"If you loved me, you wouldn't have left me for someone else!" I shouted back. The wind pulled at me. "I, I have to go home, okay? Apollo's waiting."

"No, we aren't done here!"

"I say we are!" the air whistled in my ears.

"Laurel, wait!" I turned to leave, but he grabbed my arm and pulled me against him. "I need you! It's like I'm addicted to you! I can't stop myself, please!"

He kissed me. I melted. I tried not to, but I did. It took all of my self-control to pull away. I should have slapped him, but I didn't. I just shook my head and turned around. "Kevin, please just leave me alone. That's all I'm asking."

"Well, it's too much to ask. I know I made a big mistake, but I just want another chance. Please."

I didn't answer him because I was afraid I might say yes. My feet moved away from him. "I'm sorry, Kevin. I just can't take much more pain. I'm still healing."

When I got into the house, my heart was in my stomach. I shut the door quietly and grabbed the stereo remote. 'Cancer' by My Chemical Romance was playing.I went into the kitchen without even glancing at the couch and pulled out some flour and eggs. The clock said three-o-clock.

"Laurel, what are you doing? We ate lunch at the park."

I swiped my arm over my eyes and said shakily, "I'm going to bake for a little bit so just leave me alone for a while, okay Apollo?"

"What did Kevin say?"

I sniffled. "He's such an ass," I started to shake, my vision blurred, "Damn it, I'm such a crybaby!"

I grabbed a Bounty and wiped my face. Then I started to bake a cake. Two dozen brownies and eleven cupcakes (I ran out of batter) later, I was feeling much better. I sighed and shut off the My Chemical Romance CD. I took out two bowls and put in Vanilla ice cream and hot brownies and whipped cream. Sitting down on the couch next to Apollo, my ears buzzed. We ate silently.
With a sigh I leaned against his shoulder. "I'm tired. Crying makes me so tired."

His shoulder was so comfortable. Apollo wrapped his arm around my shoulders. He was so warm. "For the record, you aren't really a crybaby. You've just been holding everything in, and it's coming out. If you want, you can always cry on me."

I stared at him curiously for a moment, realized how much I still had to cry. I grabbed a blanket and threw it over us. "You better not tell anyone."

All of my memories came flooding back and I collapsed on top of him, sobbing. I hiccuped and it went on for about fifteen minutes. At first I tried to hold back a little bit, but Apollo wrapped his arms around me and I completely broke down. I couldn't stop.

"God, why did it have to happen all at once?" I sobbed, clutching at his shirt. "It's so unfair! I couldn't handle it, I was so scared!"

"Then why didn't you lean on anyone?"

"I didn't want to be a bother to them; I didn't want to annoy anyone. After Cathy stopped being my friend, I didn't want to be a burden to anyone else."

"You aren't a burden." He embraced me tightly.

I was drained afterward. Sitting up I wiped my eyes and glanced at Apollo. I went red and looked back at the television. "Sorry about your shirt."

He pulled it off and threw it behind the couch. "No worries."

"Dear god, put on a shirt!" I scuttled to the other side of the couch, still wiping the tears from my eyes, but laughing.

"Why? Don't you like the view?"

He started contracting his muscles. I covered my eyes. "Augh! Quit it!"

I forced Apollo to go upstairs and put on another shirt. When he sat back down on the couch, Apollo looked at me.

"It's rude to stare." I muttered. I was so embarrassed.

He ran his hand over my cheek. "I was right."

"What the hell?" I slapped his hand away, glared at him.

He grinned. "You have very soft skin. I want to touch you."

"That sounds wrong."

Apollo leaned over and stroked my face again. "Quit it!"

"Stop me, then."

He pulled me across the couch and reached out to touch my face again. I slapped his hand away and stood up to leave. He grabbed me and I fell onto his lap. "Quit it already!"

"No!" He kissed me on the cheek. I gasped and turned to slap him again, but something made me stop.

"I knew you couldn't do it. See? Letting all that tension go loosened you up. It'll be a few more days and you'll be back to normal."

He kissed the corner of my lips and leaned back against the couch. I slapped him across the face. "There."

"Still, you didn't stop me." I glared and stood up. "I'm making dinner." In the kitchen, I touched the side of my mouth. It was tingling. The thought made me blush furiously.