S'Agapo

I smiled politely to Tom and walked into the nearest aisle. As soon as I was out of view, I sighed tremendously and leaned against the cans of soup. Apollo stared at me with his head cocked for a minute, then leaned forward and whispered, "Are you okay? Did Eros do something to you?"

I suddenly had the urge to slap him as hard as I could and laugh at the same time. I didn't know what to do so I smiled a little instead. "Very cute, but no, he's actually faithful to his wife."

"But, I'm faithful too!" Apollo protested, and suddenly I felt like I was staring at a little child.

"Yeah, I guess you are faithful too. But I was actually talking about Zeus, and Aphrodite. I mean I have nothing against them, but they really shouldn't let human desire get to them, you know?"

He wasn't listening. "I most definitely am faithful. It's not my fault that every woman I fell in love with did not want to be with me. But, that was another god's doing of course. I still haven't figured out did those horrible things to my beautiful-"

"Well, whatever, it doesn't matter." I just wanted him to shut up. I started to walk down the aisle and grabbed some Minestrone soup. "Do you want salad?" I called over my shoulder, but there was no answer. Instead, I heard a lot of girlie giggling. With a sigh I turned around to see at least fifteen girls surrounding Apollo. He seemed to be enjoying the attention. I muttered a few curses under my breath and started for the vegetable aisle without him.

"Stupid idiot. If he thinks he's going to flirt and ruin my 'I hate everybody' thing, well he's got another thing coming." I started to pull out cabbages and lettuce heads with too much zest, and nearly popped a tomato when I was checking it's firmness. Realizing how helter-skelter
I was, I forced myself to calm down. Now, with more irritation added to the irritation jar, I continued what I was doing, considerably calmer.

After I picked up some garlic bread, tuna, chips, salsa, bread, and ice cream (I had chocolate syrup and whipped cream at home- banana split, here I come), I went to the cash register and looked around. Surely he didn't actually...?

"If you're looking for that Greek guy who came in with you, he left with a bunch of girls. Seems he didn't even know he was supposed to be waiting for you." Tom eyed me carefully.

My thoughts reeled. 'That idiot actually left? He actually left without even saying goodbye? And does he even know where the house is? And oh my gosh, what if those girls have boyfriends? Is he going to have a temper tantrum? Oh God, please don't let him get so mad he starts killing!'

I sighed and smiled. "Oh well, he did only come here to see if he could find a girlfriend. Whatever."

Tom looked at what I was buying and said, "Why are you buying so much? Usually you buy much less...same stuff, different quantity."

I glared and stayed quiet. Tom resumed bagging. When I got home, I set everything down on the kitchen counter and started to unpack.

After packing what I didn't need away, I pulled a pot out of one of my cupboards and put it on the stove. I put on the gas, and poured in the soup thinking to myself, 'He'll come in eventually. I haven't lost him. He's not a puppy or anything. Hopefully he can find his way home.'

Usually I put on some CDs when I'm cooking but today I didn't want to. I wanted to wait up for him, make sure he didn't get himself into anything serious. Not because I cared about him, hell no, but because I wanted to make sure that Zeus wouldn't be all wrathful on me for
having lost him...or having him come back with one less arm or something. Though I wouldn't mind amputating him. A little.

By ten, he still wasn't home. I started to worry a little more now. I had already eaten dinner, but my banana split was lying on the coffee table, melting fast. Tomorrow I had work. How was he going to take care of himself without me there?

'He's absolutely retarded!'

I moaned with grief and collapsed on the couch. "I should have given that moron a cell phone. Who knew it would mean so much money just to have him in my house!"

I wanted to cry, but I was afraid to, because he might come home on his own and think I was crying because I was worried for him or something. Which I wasn't by the way. I was just really, really, pissed off you know? I mean, like I cared about that self-centered bag of
idiocy.

I pulled myself into an upright position and sighed. Resolutely, I put my banana split in the freezer, and grabbed my cell phone and car keys. I didn't know any of those girls, and I had no idea how far I would have to look for him.

I pressed play on the radio, and my Plain White T's CD started playing. I racked my brain to see if there was any way I could find him. After a few minutes, I stopped at the grocery store and walked inside, forcing down the urge to run and scream in circles with my arms flailing
wildly. Tom was about to pack up. I stopped him and asked, "Have you seen that guy who came here with me?"

"Um, not recently." He stared at me, wondering what I was up to.

I ignored his look and continued, "Well, did you know those girls he was with?"

"Yeah, one of them goes to my school, her name's Cindy something. Total slut. Probably got all the girls to help her bring him back to her house."

"What's the address?"

Shoving the slip of paper into my pocket, I pulled out of the parking lot and circled back to my house, glancing at one of the windows. The lights were on. I didn't leave the lights on. Pissed, I pulled up into the driveway and walked into the house. Apollo was sitting on the couch.

Eating my Banana split.

Trying not to show my anger, I dropped my keys on the side table and sat down next to him. I pulled off my baseball cap and pressed my palm to my head. "Where were you?" I asked, exasperated.

"At that girl Cindy's house. I was rather surprised to see so many beautiful ladies-"

"Why didn't you tell me you were leaving?"

"I couldn't find you. Besides they said that you wouldn't mind."

I was about to set him on fire. I stood up abruptly and started hitting him repeatedly with the baseball cap. "You stupid monkey! When you're living in my house you listen to my rules! If you're going to go out with some slut make sure you tell me! I have to buy you a damn cell phone now just to make sure I know where you are! You could have at least freaking told me you knew how to get home! Apollo, I have to take care of you because you have to go back to your damn mount Olympus! And if you die, I can't! And I'm most likely going to get dead
because of it! I will not have you ruining my life any more than you already have!!!"

He put down the sundae and stood up. Finally sick of my hitting, he grabbed my wrist.

"You let me go right this minute!" I writhed and then started hitting him with the other hand. He grabbed that too and wrestled them behind my back. I glared at him, but he simply smiled and pushed me onto the couch.

"Calm down, Laurel. I already have a cell phone, so you don't need to get so worked up."

He pulled a small silver cell phone from his pocket and showed it to me. I stared at his hand disbelievingly for a moment. And then, I screamed and started attacking him again. "You stupid idiot! Why didn't you call my cell!"

"Because I don't have you're number!"

I stood up on the couch, quite an impressive figure, and jumped him. He hit the carpet with a thud and I sat on his stomach, pinning his arms with my knees. I then started to beat him as mercilessly as I possibly could. "You suck! Why didn't you call my cell?"

"Because-" He managed to free himself and turned so I was pinned to the floor now, "-I don't have your number!"

Utterly pissed off, I tucked in my knees and shoved my feet into his stomach. He exhaled, almost like a deflating ball, and I pushed him off. I stood up and went into the kitchen, set up his dinner and set it on the kitchen table. "Eat."

I walked to the coffee table and grabbed the banana split, already half-eaten. Throwing away the spoon, I got a new one and sat down at the kitchen table, opposite his highness. The remote for the stereo was on the kitchen counter, so I grabbed it and pushed play. The stereo lit up and started playing a CD I had burned the other night.

'Emergency' by Paramore started playing as Apollo eyed me carefully.

"So, what is your cell phone number?"