Passion in My Eyes, Ice in My Veins

“Dammit!” I groaned as a tree branch ripped my shirt.

I sighed and shrugged it off. It was little, so it didn’t matter that much. I pushed past the bushes and the branches, and came across the beach. An orange and red light illuminated the sand, giving it a nice warm orange tint. I looked to my right and saw a ton of people from graduation surrounding a fire with a beer in their hand, laughing with their friends.

I sighed quietly to myself, seeing everyone. I didn’t want to be here. I couldn’t stand to see him. What was I thinking coming here in the first place? I shouldn’t be here.

I turned around to head back, but I bumped into someone. I instantly got scared. Who was that close to me?

“Lost?” the strangers voice asked in a low tone.

I recognized it. “I’m not staying,” I told him, my voice trembling.

He came out of the shadows and the light from the fire lit up his face. It was Matt, of course. Coming to beg me to stay. “Leslie. Please stay.”

I shook my head and tried to push past him. Seeing him made my heart sink, and I didn’t want to deal with that right now.

He grabbed my hand and pulled me back to him. “Matt! Get off!” I yelled, feeling tears stinging my eyes.

Before I could say anything, his lips crashed against mine. My eyes were wide with shock since I didn’t see it coming at all. What was he doing? Why was he kissing me? But the bigger question, why wasn’t I fighting it?

I’m mad at him. I told myself over and over. Finally I pulled away. “Matt.”

“I’m sorry Leslie.” He sighed. “You know I would take it back if I could.”

“That doesn’t change anything,” I mumbled and crossed my arms, trying not to think about his sweet lips on mine.

“I know it doesn’t.” He sighed. “But I really am sorry. I want to take it back. I blew up at you for no reason.” He took a step towards me and put his hand on my cheek. “I don’t want to leave when we’re in a fight.”

I looked at him in the eyes and saw that he seriously meant it. “I don’t want that either.”

He stroked my cheek again and I slightly leaned into his palm. It was so warm and gentle. I loved his touch.

“Are we okay?” Matt asked quietly.

I looked back up at him and nodded with a small smile. “Yeah.”

Matt grinned and kissed me sweetly. This time, more gentle and with more passion. We both pulled away when we heard someone cough. I looked past Matt’s turned head and saw Zacky and the guys.

“I see you two made up.” Brian laughed.

Matt took my hand and we walked out of the trees onto the sand. “Want a drink?” Matt asked as we walked towards the huge group of people, completely ignoring the guys.

I laughed a little at how the guys looked confused since Matt blew them off, then looked at him. “Sure.”

He grabbed a beer for the two of us out of a cooler people brought and handed one to me. “Lets go for a walk.”

I followed Matt down the shore, past the piers. It was really nice to be like this with him again. It’s been a few weeks since we last spoke to each other. It was about time we made up.

“I’m glad you came.” He looked down at me as I kicked the water.

“Me too.” I nodded and looked up at him with a slight smile.

“I really am sorry, Leslie.” He sighed. “I just can’t believe I’m leaving you behind tomorrow.”

“Don’t say that.” I shook my head. “I’m going to be with you,” I told him in a quiet voice.

He just looked at me confused. “In here.” I blushed and put my hand over his chest.

He smiled and lifted my hand off his chest and kissed it gently. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” I smiled widely.

He stopped walking then turned me to him completely. He cupped my face in my hands and kissed me sweetly. I put my hands on his abs, since I couldn’t help myself, and kissed him back with a grin.

I heard a wave break, and my first instinct was to run away, but Matt didn’t show any sign of moving. I knew we were in for it. Water rushed up, making the two of us stumble, but I felt Matt’s grip tighten around me. That wasn’t enough to keep us from falling.

Matt and I fell into the sand laughing. I rolled over onto my back with a sigh and looked up at the starry sky. Matt laid next to me and took my hand in his. “Perfect last night,” I mumbled quietly.

“I can think of one other thing to make this night even more perfect.” I didn’t even have to look at Matt to know he was smirking.

I laughed a little. “You’re not serious, are you?” I looked over at him.

Matt just kept smirking and then pulled me on top of him. “Matt.” I blushed and looked around at all the people by the bon fire. I wasn’t going to have sex with him in public.

“What?” He kissed my neck sweetly, rubbing my sides.

“Not in public.” I blushed.

He pulled away and looked at me. “Then we can go somewhere else.” He stroked my cheek.

He stood up and I watched him wipe the sand off his back side. Before I could protest, Matt scooped me up in his arms. I giggled and wrapped my arms around his neck.

I probably shouldn’t do this with Matt since I would just get even more attached. But my body wasn’t going to stop me tonight.

Matt carried me to his beat up black truck and opened the bed. “We’re still in public.” I looked at him, not wanting to do this in the bed of his truck.

He groaned a little then carried me to the side of the truck and opened the door. “A little crammed, but it’ll do.” I shrugged, purposely acting difficult just to annoy him.

“Leslie.” Matt groaned as he laid me down on the back long seat.

I just chuckled and grabbed him by his shirt, pulling him down to me. “Matt.” I mocked him then kissed him with a smile.

He laughed against my lips and crawled on top of me. Matt deepened the kiss and slid his hands up my shirt.

A half hour later, Matt was laying on top of me, trying to catch his breath. I finally opened my eyes once my body relaxed. Matt looked up at me with a weak smile and I stroked his cheek. “Now, it’s a perfect night.” I smiled and kissed him.

“It is.” He smiled and kissed my nose then sat up slowly.

He grabbed his boxers and pulled them on, then tossed me my underwear. Once Matt had his boxers and pants on, I sat up and got dressed. “What are we doing now?” I asked quietly as I slipped on my flip flops.

“Want to go back to the bon fire?” He shrugged his shoulders.

“No.” I shook my head then pulled him back over to me.

“Leslie!” He laughed as he lost his balance, falling onto the seat again.

“What?” I laughed and laid on top of him sweetly.

“I guess you would rather do this?” He raised an eyebrow.

I nodded and rest my head on his chest. I wanted to soak up every moment I had with him. I wanted us to just be alone with no distractions.

Matt slowly ran his finger tips up and down my spine lightly. I stared out the front window between the two front seats, watching the waves crash onto the shore. I let out a sigh and Matt heard.

“What baby?”

I gulped. “We won’t be able to do this for very much longer.”

“Why?” He raised an eyebrow.

“It’s 2 in the morning,” I said quietly.

Matt sighed heavily then kissed my head. “I should take you home.”

“I live in walking distance.” I sat up and looked down at him.

“Then we’ll walk. That means more time together.” He laughed.

I laughed a little too then got out of his truck, making sure I wasn’t forgetting anything. He took my hand in his as we made our way out of the mini parking lot and across the vacant street. “I’m actually scared of leaving,” Matt mumbled quietly as he looked around at all the buildings.

“What?” I asked confused. “Why?”

“Cause nothing will be familiar to me where ever I go.” His voice was a little sad, and I didn’t really understand why.

“But it will be fun,” I said cheerfully. “You’ll be traveling the country with the guys and Matt and Jason. You’ll be playing huge arena’s with huge bands.” I smiled up at him. “You’ll have so much fun, you’ll forget all about PCH.”

“But I won’t forget about you.” He looked down at me with a slight frown.

“You won’t even think of me cause you’ll be so busy drinking and having fun.” I laughed a little.

“I’m not going to forget you. I’ll always be thinking about you, no matter what I’m doing.”

I sighed a little as we reached my house. “You’re not making this any easier.” I said sadly, looking down.

“I’m sorry.” He sighed and pulled me into his arms then kissed my head. “I’m just afraid to leave you.”

“I’m not doing anything with my life. I’ll be stuck in Huntington for the rest of my life.”

“Not until you come with us.”

“Matt-”

He cut me off. “You’re going to come with us some time. I swear.”

I just sighed and looked back down at my feet. I wasn’t going to make him keep his word. After all, he’s going to be a rock star. And they don’t keep their words, do they?

“I’ll be here tomorrow morning.” He kissed me sweetly. “We’re leaving at eleven.”

I sighed and nodded and kissed him back. “Bye.” My voice sounded so pathetic.

“See ya tomorrow.” He waved then walked down the street.

I walked to my room window and crawled in sadly, knowing I probably wouldn’t see Matt again. Unless I was watching TV. It was something I had to face. We’ll probably forget about each other sooner or later and find someone else. I know it’s going to happen.