Passion in My Eyes, Ice in My Veins

“Calm down Leslie,” Cassandra said for the hundredth time as I stared at the box in my shaking hands. “A lot of people have to do this.”

“Yeah, slutty people. Not me.” I corrected her, staring at the boxes around it.

“I’ll buy it.” She offered.

“No, I’ll do it.” I sighed and took a deep breath. I put the box in the cart with the 3 others then made my way to the check out.
If I didn’t look at them, I wouldn’t notice them looking at me oddly for having so many. The person scanned each one then gave me the total. I paid them, then ran for it, with Cassandra behind me.

We got in her car then drove back to my house quickly. I was so scared. Nervous, and scared.

“Leslie?” Cassandra asked from the other side of the bathroom door.

I gulped as I waited impatiently. I walked to the door and opened it then looked at Cassandra. “It’s almost finished,” I told her, biting my nails nervously.

“It’ll be okay, you know.” Cassandra rubbed my back. “There’s nothing to be afraid of.”

“Are you kidding? I’m fresh out of high school! I’m not even in College yet!” I shouted, my hands balling into fists.

“At least you’ve graduated.” She shrugged. “Not many people can say that.”

I sighed and looked at the clock then saw it was 10 minutes. I grabbed the test and looked at it. As soon as I did, my fingers became butter and it slipped out of my hands onto the ground. I stared at the ground and felt my knees begin to shake.

“Oh my god…” I heard Cassandra whisper as she saw my reaction.

“I’m gonna faint.” My eyes started to close and I thought I was for sure going to hit the ground. But I didn’t.

I woke up groaning. Cassandra was hovering above me in the bathroom, patting a damp wash cloth over my head. “Leslie, thank god.” She sighed. “I was about to get your parents.”

I sat up, not even thinking about the fact I just fainted and I should have laid there for a while. I picked up the test and saw a plus sign on the end. “It’s wrong.” I stood up quickly and ripped open another type of test.

“Leslie.” Cassandra sighed. “You might be.”

“No,” I shook my head, “I’m not. Get out.” I pointed to the door as I unbuttoned my jeans and unzipped them.

Cassandra sighed and walked out, closing the door behind her.

Another ten minutes went by.

Another plus.

Another box opened.

Another test.

More pluses.

“No!” I cried in Cassandra’s arms in my bathroom. “I’m not! There’s no way! I can’t be!”

“It’ll be okay, Leslie.” Cassandra rubbed my back. “You’re a great girl, and Matt’s a great guy. It’ll all work out.”

“He’s on tour! I can’t just call him and tell him about this! He’ll have a heart attack! I’m not making him leave his tour for me.” I shook my head, sobbing.

Cassandra sighed. “You have to tell him.”

“No I don’t.” I shook my head. “I can just go into hiding.”

“He’s going to come back to see you, ya know. He’s going to know sooner or later.” Cassandra sighed.

“No.” I shook my head. “He’s not going to know. I’ll tell him I moved to the Middle East or something.”

“Yeah right! Like Matt would fall for that.” She rolled her eyes.

I looked at her thinking I had a good plan, then started to cry even more. “I don’t know what to do. My parents are going to kill me.”

“They’ll understand.” Cassandra kissed my head. “It’ll be okay Leslie. I promise. You and Matt can get through this.”

Just then the phone rang. “What time is it?” I asked her, feeling my heart stop.

“Six-thirty,” she replied looking at her watch. From my expression, she knew who was calling. “You have to tell him.” She stood up.

“Don’t answer it!” I yelled after her as she walked out of the bathroom. I got up and tried to get it before she did, but she got there first. “I hate you!” I whispered as she went to say hello.

“Hey Matt. Oh, yeah, well I came over to have a movie night. Yeah, she’s in the shower though. Um, we went swimming. Yeah, I know she can’t swim well. Sure, I will. Alright. Bye.” She hung up then looked at me. “You’re lucky I didn’t tell him.”

I felt my eyes start to water again. “Cassandra.” My voice cracked. It felt like this was the first time I saw that plus sign. The first time I came to the realization. I knew what was happening. But it seemed like reality just set in at that very moment. And it hit hard. “I’m pregnant.”