Nothing Like You.

“Tucker, how many times are you going to be back in my office this year?”

I noticed the hint of boredom and annoyance in the school nurses voice. This is the twenty-third time I’ve been in her office for something more than just a pack of ice. She had to use one of those butterfly bandages to hold a cut together on my forehead. Dad was going to flip.

I just gave her the same smile I’ve been giving and walked out of her office. I noticed Annie was sitting on the small row of benches along the corridor—waiting for me as she always does if I’m not in English. For the first time I just walked by her, didn’t look at her and I didn’t even stop as she called my name.

As soon as I rounded the corner I booked it; I ran out of the main entrance, not caring about signing out. I was already in shit for fighting once again—well defending myself. We were only six blocks away from our apartment complex, Frank would be home—I didn’t really want to deal with him.

I headed towards the shore, it was only a ten block walk and let’s face it, I had all the time in the world till seven, when Dad got home. I could just tell Frank I was with Annie, unless she by chance calls and asks of my whereabouts—then I’m fucked. I just shrugged to myself and walked to the shore.

I remember everything from my childhood—I resented my birth parents with great passion. I remember how much pain I went through, how could they put those substances in my small body? Withdraw was a bitch, I remember I would cry and cry for hours at a time, sometimes Mikey wasn’t even there to hold me.

It was so cold and dark my first night in Hope Falls, I was so scared. I noticed I was the youngest person there and Mikey was second in age to mine. That’s what drew me to him, he looked younger than most of the other patients. The sound of the waves crashing brought me out of my nightmarish thoughts. I glanced out across the ocean in front of me.

The sound was soothing to my thoughts, almost a lulling to sleep; I knew better than to doze off though. I watched families, all with more than one child and all with a woman and a man. One more child to be spared from the pain of being tormented of having two fathers, or two mothers—what’s wrong with my family? I have love and support, more than what I ask for, more than what I need;more than I actually acknowledge.

I have someone who is constantly there for more, telling me when I’ve done my best and that was good enough. I don’t have high expectations, I come from a home where I was actually nurtured once I was fixed from the mess of a home-life I had before. I hate the nightmares, the memories—before Mikey.

When I was younger he was my dad, now that I’m older he’s my best friend. I remember that first time Annie told me her mom said she couldn’t be my friend. I was only five or six and I could only think as I cried to Mikey—the pretty girl can’t be my friend—why does having two daddies have to matter?

I know now that not many people understand, well no, let me rephrase this; most people can’t get past the fact that it’s ‘immoral’ for two people of the same sex to be together. Just because Frank’s not my favorite person on the planet and I’d rather see Mikey do better—I still see the way his eyes light up whenever Frank’s near, or when they embrace or kiss, you can feel it in their air, the love they have for each other, it’s real, and it’s genuine.

I want a love like that, something that’s going to last. I felt the cool breeze brush through my hair. I closed my eyes and let the sea breeze wash over me, the smell of the salt water invading my nostrils—my small break from this hell that is my life.