Lots of Love, Mike

The next day Stella felt so low. Ryan had had a marvellous time at the concert and with the guys so she covered up her feelings for his sake. Mike had hardly spoken to her just to ask how they were. By they she thought he was referring to Jessica. He didn’t bring the subject up at all after that and this hurt her immensely. May be she wouldn’t go to California after all. She’d just stay put here, like she always had done.

She was hoping for an opportunity to get Adrienne alone to tell her. She felt she would sort of understand but the opportunity didn’t arise. They’d eaten and had some drinks with the guys but everyone was tired and her and Ryan had to get their train home. She wished now she’d stayed in a hotel in London but then they had to get home for Jessica.

She went away yesterday to meet the guys with a spring in her step, looking forward to meeting everyone and she had, she’d felt part of it all again just like she always did when she was with them but Mike had spoilt it. He’d remained distant and it was obvious to everyone that something was wrong between them.

It would be four months before she saw them again and in that four months she had planned to sell her house, arrange to sell her business and get ready for telling the guys in June that she was going back home with them. She’d changed her mind now. After Mike’s reaction, who knew what the others would be like? How could she go to California if they were going to feel like that about her? She may as well stay put.

*

“Mike what the fuck is bothering you?” Said Billie, “you’ve been like it for days now. What is it dude? Something is definitely up.”

“Its nothing,” replied Mike.

“Like fuck,” said Billie getting pissed off with his friend wallowing in his mood.

“Billie,” said Adi, “language.”

“Fuck the language I want to know what’s wrong with Mike. There is something wrong, you don’t live with someone day in and day out for fucking nearly 20 years and not know when something is worrying them.” He said pacing around the room.

Mike sat quietly.

They were having a weeks’ break from the tour but just decided they’d stay at home for the week, relax and chill with all their kids. Everyone was expected round at Adi and Billie’s from a swim in the pool and a barbeque. Mike had turned up about an hour early.

“When’s Tre due round?” Mike suddenly said.

“In about an hour,” said Adi, “but then so were you and here you are already,” she said bustling off to the kitchen to prepare some salad. She was glad to get away from Mike he had pissed her off the way he had been with Stella after the concert. How rude.

“Billie I need to show you something,” Mike said.

“You’re not going to get your dick out are ya,” said Billie trying to make light of things.

“Fuck off,” said Mike getting something out of his pocket. “This.”

He handed Billie the letter that Stella had sent him.

“Is this what you were hiding before? It is a letter from Stella, I knew it. What’s going on? You’re not ten years old again; we always share Stella’s letters around. Why have you been hiding it?”

“Because of what it says.” Said Mike unable to look at his friend all of a sudden.

Billie was confused.

“You can read it,” said Mike shrugging and standing up. “You can all read it, I think you all need to know what it says.”

“What do you mean all?” said Billie.

“You, Adi, Tre, all of you. Michelle knows what’s in it.” Said Mike.

“When have you seen Michelle?” said Billie looking up at his tall friend.

“When Stella wrote to me she put a copy of this letter in with her letter to Michelle.”

“Oh right,” said Billie even more confused and looking at the white envelope.

“Read it,” said Mike, “I’m going outside.”

Billie got out the letter and read it, and then he read it again.

“Fuck,” he said to himself.

“Are you OK?” said Adi coming from the kitchen and wiping her hands on a towel. “Billie? What’s wrong?” she said looking at her husband who looked slightly pale.

“Read it.” Said Billie handing over the letter to Adrienne.

“What is it?” said Adrienne, frowning.

“A letter to Mike from Stella. This is why Mike’s been like he is and I’m not surprised. He wants us all to read it.”

“Who’s all?” said Adrienne taking the letter from Billie.

“You, me, Tre. Michelle knows about it, she has a copy too.”

“Billie what is it? You’re scaring me,” said Adrienne.

”Don’t be scared silly,” said Billie putting his hand out onto Adrienne’s arm. “Its just important that you read it,” he said leaving the room.

“Where are you going?” said Adi

“I’m going outside to see Mike.” He said then he was gone.

Adi was just about to start reading when the doorbell went. It was Michelle and Ron.

“Are you OK honey?” said Michelle looking at Adi.

“I’m not sure, Billie just handed me this letter to read. It’s a letter from Stella to Mike; apparently Mike wants us to read it. You have a copy I understand.”

“I do.” Said Michelle looking down slightly.

“I’m going outside,” said Ron obviously knowing what this was all about.

“Do you want me to stay while you read it?” Said Michelle.

“Please,” said Adi sitting down. Michelle sat down beside her.

Adi read the letter and looked at Michelle.

“Fuck,” she said and as she said it the doorbell went again.

Tre.

Michelle let him in.

“Hey you beautiful wenches,” he said bounding in the door.

“Come in Tre,” said Adi.

“What’s with the faces? Where is everyone?” said Tre looking about him.

“They’re all outside, we’re in here just reading a letter that Stella sent to Mike a short while ago.”

“Oh, right,” said Tre frowning.

“He wants us all to read it, he says it’s important. It’s why he’s been shitty just recently.” Said Adrienne standing up.

“Oh. OK. Shall I read it now?” said Tre.

“I think so,” said Adrienne handing it over.

“Yeah, let me read it, then I need to get out into that pool and have a huge beer.”

“Shall we stay?” said Adrienne.

“What do you want to stay for?” said Tre. “Just get me my beer woman,” he said settling down onto the sofa and opening up the letter.

**

Adi, Michelle, Mike and Billie were in the garden waiting for Tre to finish the letter.

“I still can’t believe it,” said Mike.

“I can,” said Billie.

“Can you?” said Adi

“Yes.” Billie replied putting his arm around his wife’s waist.

“So can I,” said Michelle

“But this is why you fell out with her in the first place.” Said Adrienne looking at Michelle.

“I know and I feel awful about it. She was obviously confused, pregnant, so far away from everyone. I think I let her down a little. If I’d stayed in contact may be... may be it wouldn’t have taken her so long to tell us about little Jessica.” Michelle did feel awful about the situation but knew that there was no going back now, what’s done was done.

Billie sighed and Adi cuddled in close to him.

“Are you OK?” she whispered into his ear.

“Of course I am its just…” he hesitated.

“It’s just the name Jessica did it for you didn’t it?”

“It did.”

“Hey, did you all see the photograph?” asked Mike.

“Yes,” said everyone at the same time.

“What a likeness,” they all said at once.

“Come on Tre,” said Mike, “what’s taking you so long?”

“Give him time; he may need to let it sink in,” said Billie.

“Yes I think he always did have something for Stella.” Said Adrienne.

“He told me once he was in love with her.” Michelle responded.

“Really?” Said Mike

“Really,” said Michelle, “but he wanted it kept quiet.”

“Poor Tre,” said Adi.

“Where the fuck is he? Lets go and get him; his beer’s getting warm,” said Billie.

They all trooped into the house. On the sofa where Tre had been sitting was the envelope. The letter was on the floor. The photograph was missing and so was Tre. He had gone.

The next day…

“Tre its Michelle, we’ve been worried about you.” She said. Tre sounded tired.

“I left a message on Billie’s phone to say I was fine but needed to clear my head.” Tre said speaking into the phone.

“We understand but we’re still worried about you. Can I come round and see you?” she said, “just to check that you’re OK.”

“Of course,” said Tre. He loved Michelle and always had time for her.

**

Tre let Michelle in and they walked through to the kitchen. Michelle noticed the photograph on the kitchen table of Jessica.

Tre saw her look.

“She’s beautiful,” he said.

“I know.” Said Michelle picking up the photograph.

“And the likeness…” said Tre coming over to have another look.

“…yeah… I noticed that too.” Michelle said then looked up at him.

“Do you understand why she did it?”

“At first, no, but after thinking about it, yes I do. None of us were there for her and I feel bad. How can we make it up to her Michelle?”

“None of you have to make it up to her. I think she just wants you to understand, a little understanding that’s all.”

“We agree,” said some voices. It was Billie, Adi and Mike all standing in Tre’s kitchen.

“We should have contacted her more frequently,” said Billie.

“But we were so busy with American Idiot,” said Mike.

“We were,” said Tre.

“But its no excuse really is it?” said Billie, “she’s our friend, we love her.”

“Well… you need to tell her,” said Michelle.

“I can’t wait to see her,” said Mike

“Me neither,” said Tre.

“It won’t be long, a few months, only until June and we can see her properly and tell her how we feel and that we’re sorry for it all to have come to this,” said Mike.

“Mike?” said Tre.

Mike looked across at his old friend.

“We need to talk.”