Jinxed Things Ringing

"Albert! Cindy!"

My heart lurched at that undeniable and unforgettable call.

"LISA!"

"ODETTE!"

"AAAHHHH!"

They were probably doing their happy dance now. I heard the other names being called out of all our relatives and close friends. Not to mention their kids. Oh boy. The kids.

"Don't worry about it," Brendon whispered. His head was currently resting in my lap as I fiddled around with his hair nervously.

Of course I saw the line of rental cars approaching our street from my omniscient view. But that still did not prepare me.

"If it makes you feel any better. You...you look amazing," Brendon complimented me. I smiled and bent my head down to peck his cheek, barely missing his lips.

The arrival of our guests was three days prior to Christmas Eve. They wanted to settle in, see Damien's last performance, and just enjoy their stay.

"I can't do this," I sighed and stood up and marched to my sun seat. I tucked my knees under my chin and stared desperately out the window towards the sea.

"Like everything else you can't do?" I heard a snide voice.

"Oh dear God," I said out loud as I stared at the devil herself.

"Aw! You said that out loud! How embarrassing for you," She cooed.

I knew she spotted Brendon on my bed. She was acting extra stuck up.

I sighed.

"Hullo Samantha," I said dully. Samantha smiled a big over-exaggerated smile for one quick second before sneering.

"Hi. Miss me much?" She asked looking around my room.

"Oh not enough dear," I said sarcastically as she circled my room.

"Hm. I want this room," She stated finally putting her foot down. I laughed out a bark.

She didn't crack a smile.

"Get out,"

"But JOOONNNYYY," She whined.

"No seriously. Get out."

"Aren't you going to pay any respect to your guest?!"

"Leave thy premises wench!"

"When I get this room, the boy comes with it right?" She picked her nails.

I don't know what came over me that moment, but I I immediately stood up at this.

Or...attempted to.

I was still sitting with my knees to my chest, so when I had tried to stand up, my knees got caught in my dress and made me fall.

Fast.

Forward.

And on my face.

I quickly scrambled up to face the witch. She let out a laugh.

"I guess I hit a soft spot. You two dating?" She asked.

"No," I snapped at her. She grinned.

I knew that grin.

"Aw shit," I whispered.



"Mama! Genviève had a boy in her room!" Samantha's whiny voice echoed through the foyer.

"Holy shitfuck," Brendon muttered so only I could hear.

The group standing in the foyer was bigger than the group of Ghost Hunters pack that came for Thanksgiving.

I felt like I was opening the house as a Bed and Breakfast.

No doubt that it could be one. Every room had it's own key.

Hmm...idea.

Save for later.

"Okay?" Brendon said softly. "But I don't think now's the time to open out the rooms."

"Right," I shook my head.

"Genviève baby!" I heard a lady scream.

"Genviève!"

"Jonny!"

"JON!"

"Genviève honey!"

"Uh! HELLO!" I shouted to the mass of middle-aged women. They all charged at me and engulfed me in a group hug.

"Is there a skunk in this hug?!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. A large amount of people started laughing.

"I'M NOT KIDDING! I CAN'T BREATHE!" I screamed. The hug froze and awkwardly broke up.

I noticed Aunt Lulu looking a little upset.

Her fault if she wore a dead rat as fragrance.

"You're soo big now!"

"Are you calling me fat?" I countered.

"Your hair is long!"

"Are judging my haircut?"

"What cute clothes!"

"They're not a hundred dollars you know,"

"What is that beautiful smell?"

"Hey blame Aunt Lu for that one,"

"Your skin is FLAWLESS!"

"Make sure my toiletries stays here this time, Aunt Sally,"

"Who's that young man?"

"Uh!"

"Was he in your room?!"

"He- uhm. . ."

"Ladies!" I'm pretty sure I heard Aunt Lulu shriek. At once, all the women left me alone and made a circle around Brendon.

Bitch!

Lulu is NOT getting any presents from me this year.

Sad that she initially was getting perfume from us.



The following day, Samantha made it her mission to ruin my life.

"Say Ah," Brendon said holding a strawberry to my mouth. I laughed and rolled my eyes.

"Do it!" He yelled at me.

"No!" I argued.

"Do it!" He growled. I opened my mouth and said 'aaaahh'. Brendon made plane noises with his mouth.

Right when the strawberry was about to touch my lips-

"ARcgghh!" I yelled as I was rushed into the floor. My mouth agape, I looked up to see Samantha accepting the fruit into her mouth. She wrapped her lips around the berry and seductively squeezed the juice into her mouth.

Her eyes never leaving Brendon's appalled face.

"Ew! GOD SAMANTHA! STOP BEING A SLUT!" a tall lanky boy with freckles and rectangular framed glassed walked in.

Samantha rolled her eyes.

"IAN!" I yelled and ran to the older lanky kid.

We embraced quickly.

"How are you son?" I asked him.

"Oh shut up," He said punching my arm. "I'm older than you bitch,"

"Such harsh words to use against a lady,"

"Where!" He asked looking around like a spazz.

"Idiot," I said shaking my head, but couldn't help but to laugh. "Ian, this is my best buddy Brendon. Bren, this is Ian- Samantha's brother,"

Brendon shook Ian's hand, but I noticed Ian quickly retract his hand.

"Wow dude. You're hand are...really soft," Ian said rubbing his fingertips. "I didn't even feel your hand!"

"Haha yeahhh..." Brendon said awkwardly.

"Oh, er Brendon! Have you been using my lotions again?" I asked in a silly voice. Ian and Samantha bought it. They chuckled.

"How old are you?" Ian asked curiously adjusting his beanie on his head, his longish hair escaping from the bottom to adorn his forehead.

"Uhm," Brendon thought to himself rubbing his eyes.

"He turned 20 in April," I shot out. Brendon cast me a sideways glance.

"Oh cool. I'm 19," Ian replied crossing his arms. "So. . .do you have a-"

"Oh!" I screamed. Everyone shot a look at me suddenly. "Oh, oh NOO! No mister!" I said pointing my finger at Ian and shaking my head with known suspicions. "No!"

Ian pouted.

"NO! NOT ON SALE," I glared at him. I grabbed Brendon's arm and led him out of the kitchen.

"I didn't realize I turned 20 in April," Brendon laughed at me.

"You did," I replied. "I didn't say which year you turned 20. But I'm sure you did in one of them,"

"So what was that whole spazz attack thing?" Brendon asked.

"Ian wanted a new boyfriend,"

"Oh." Brendon said.

"..."

"OH...OH! OH HELL NO!"

"That's what I was waiting for," I laughed.



"Oh is that the dress?" Brendon asked.

"NO!" I screamed.

"WAH!" Brendon yelled in fright. I covered the dress up with a sheet. "God damn Genviève! You scared me out of my wits!"

I turned to readjust the sheet on my mannequin and hung my arms around her shoulders with a sigh.

"I'm sorry. I've been just so on the edge lately. Everything I do...every small detail- she's just...UGH!"

"Jon," Brendon whined pressing his face into my back. "Don't stress over her. She's not worth it,"

"I know," I sighed. "She just gets under my skin. And just how much she irritates me. I'm so afraid you'll think she's better than me,"

"Don't be so insecure Genviève," Brendon chastised.

"I'm not. Just around her. I don't know. I don't feel so great. I mean- she's got the body, the looks, the attitude. I feel so awkward,"

"You don't have looks. You have beauty. She has a body, but you have a figure. You don't have attitude, you have- so much more,"

"What's that?" I asked softly.

"Me," he replied just as quietly. I turned around and fell into his embrace as we sat hugging.

Little did I know there was a very angry brunette holding a plate of strawberries outside my room.

She was not satisfied.

And she would do everything in her power to take Brendon.



"Yeah Damien!"

"Ow! OWWWW!"

"JOSEPH IS ONE HOT NUMBER!"

The catcalls and wolf-whistles from Roger and his friends were echoing throughout the school auditorium as Damien entered on the stage.

He clutched his rags and glared right at the group, letting out a twitch every once in a while.

He said his line only to be interrupted by Roger himself-

"TAKE OFF THE PANTS!"

Damien snapped.

"THEY'RE NOT PANTS!!" 'Joseph' screamed at the audience. "I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE! THESE TASSELS DO NOT COORDINATE WITH THESE SEQUINS!"

Joseph started tugging at the dangling pieces of flashy string.

'Mary' started crying and the 'Baby Jesus' started reciting nursery rhymes in a very suspiciously feminine robot voice.

I heard the small pitter-patter of feet slapping the linoleum, so I looked to my right (I was in the aisle seat) I saw the last thing I was expecting to see.

"Tramp!" I hissed.

The small pale yellow duck paused at the noise and looked at me. Recognizing the face and voice, it happily ran into my leg nipping at me lovingly.

I picked the duck up and let him sit in my lap. Tramp, being incredibly satisfied, cuddled into my lap and sat down quietly.

I couldn't stay mad at it, so I placed a small kiss on it's beautiful head.

He quaked.

I smiled.

New. Best. Friend.

"FOR CHRIST'S SAKE! SHUT UP MARY!"

"SPOUSE ABUSE!" Roger shouted at Damien.

"We have traveled a long way and my wife is very tired, aren't you Mary?" Damien said his lines forcefully gritting his teeth.

'Mary', who looked like she was going to burst into tears any second, nodded viciously.

"JUST SAY NO MARY!"

"Thank. You. For. Your Kindness. Sir," Damien gritted out, not waiting for the 'Innkeeper' to respond.

"GIRL, STICK TO YOUR MORALS!"

"Aren't we grateful, Mary?" Damien was turning red.

"YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING HE TELL YOU!"

"Mary?!"

"KEEP YOUR LEGS CLOSED HONEY!"

"MARY!"

"MAR-"

"Mooommmyyyy!" 'Mary' started wailing dropping 'baby Jesus' who started singing electronically-

"Mary had a little lamb..."

The audience was in shock.

My parents were in shock.

Our guests were in shock.

Brendon and I were cracking up.