Close My Eyes,and Fly

There was a calm stillness in the air as Aaron woke, the kind of calmness one might expect before a storm. She could see through a patch of light radiating through the curtains that it was high noon and they were both late for class.

She smiled to herself, glancing over at Jack who’s arm was draped over his face, shielding him from the suns beams. She lay there thinking, as her eyes traced over Jacks features. No doubt her parents were looking for her, and no doubt there would be consequences for running away from home, but for the time being she didn’t care about her future. Not with this beautiful morning and this beautiful human being before her in the present.

“Ya know, it’s really creepy when you don’t blink like that” Jack mumbled, a smirk playing across his face as he lifted his arm to gaze at her.

“I was in deep philosophical thought you jerk!” she teased, shoving him playfully.

“Well that would be a first.” Jack sat up, stretching and groaning as he gazed around at his room. Aaron raised her eyebrow.

“Well aren’t you a morning person” she said, kissing his shoulder as he slid off the end of the bed to collect his clothes.

“When you’re here, absolutely” he said with a smile, turning around and kissing her gently on the lips. “Ya hungry?” he continued as they broke apart. Aaron nodded enthusiastically attempting to crawl out of the bed behind him. She was sore.

“You know, I never would of agreed to yesterday had I’d known that today I would feel like someone took a chainsaw to my lady bits.” She mused, pulling her clothes on as she spoke.

“Lady bits?” Jack teased, kissing the top of her head. “ It will hurt less with time” Aaron raised her eyebrow

“And who said there will be another time?” she teased back, folding her arms across her chest “Maybe I don’t like you enough!” she began to strut away, swinging her hips dramatically as she walked.

“Well shoot!” Jack called after her as he tucked in his shirt. “ Had I known that I would of made you sleep on the floor!”

“At least I would have had room!” Aaron laughed, making her way into the kitchen that was still in complete disarray.

Jack walked up behind her and placed his hand on the small of her back, kissing her cheek. “Well what can I make ya?’ he asked, brushing past her on his way to the fridge.

“hmm.. well seeing that I want to live how about we go out to eat” Aaron responded, checking her reflection in the dusty mirror hanging on the wall.

“Fair enough” Jack laughed, slamming the fridge shut. “I’ll even let you choose” he beamed, guiding Aaron outside.

“Such a gentleman” Aaron smiled, making her way downstairs. The afternoon sun felt good against her skin as they made their way to the local diner. Her hair whisked in the wind as she traced her fingers through the air, once again a feeling of comfort washed over her, and she glanced over at Jack who was humming to a nameless tune on the radio.

“I love you” she heard herself blurt out; wishing she could catch her words before they reached Jacks ears.

There was stillness in the car. Jack glanced over at her.

“You what?” he asked, nervously glancing at the road and then back at her. Aaron remained frozen, petrified at the very words she had just spoken.

“ I’m sorry, I don’t know what I’m doing” she said finally, she could feel tears swelling up inside her. “ Its just been a very emotional last few days.” She continued, folding her arms over her chest as she glanced out the window.

An awkward silence ensued as the two continued down a tree lined street towards the diner. Finally Jack spoke.

“Aaron, I really,really care about you but I don’t think I’m there yet.. I’m not ready to say that back.. I’m sorry.” He said slowly, fumbling on his words as though he had been pondering them all this time.

Aaron felt a flush of embarrassment wash over her and she kept her eyes on the fast moving pavement outside.

“I mean, last night meant a lot to me but..” Jack continued.

“but what?” Aaron interrupted, glancing over at him with tear stained cheeks. “But you’re done with me? But I’m not capable of loving? I was just another notch in your belt? What is it Jack?” She felt her voice rising.

“No that’s not it!” Jack pleaded, brushing his hair out of his eyes as he sighed. “ I’m just not in a place right now with you where that’s something I’m ready to say.”

Aaron felt her hands tremble as she searched for a way out of the car, and out of the situation. “Let me out of here.” She mumbled, fidgeting with the door handle.

“Aaron don’t do this. We’re in the middle of town.” Jack sighed, glancing over at her with worried eyes.

“I said let me out!” she yelled banging on the window with open palms. The car came to a stop and she jumped out “Just forget I said anything Jack. Forget about last night and all of this.. whatever this was to you.” She said bitterly slamming the door behind her.