Miserable at Best
Don't Trust Anyone Anymore.
"Do you, Alexander William Gaskarth take Brooklyn Claire Lawson, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish 'till death do you part?"
Now I bet you've got this pretty little picture perfect wedding in your head. Alex in a tux, me in a gorgeous white gown, both of our families there, our friends, and both of us with smiles on our faces. But that wasn't the case in this marriage, not by far.
Most people, when they hear those words are happy to be in the situation they're in. But that's most people. There's no silent pause for response. They don't have to think about it, they know that the person standing before them is the one. The one person they are planning to spend the rest of their life with, the one who stole their heart with no intention of giving it back.
The vow, is the most personal, heartfelt, emotional, binding part of the ceremony, and to us, it meant nothing. As he held my hand I looked at everything but his eyes, I was never the one to keep eye contact. That is until he gently squeezed my hand, my eyes made their way from my shoes to his eyes. He searched my eyes, my face, and he knew, I didn't want this. I didn't want to marry him, I didn't want to be the future Mrs. Alex Gaskarth, not in the least. But what I wanted and didn't want didn't matter, it never did. And the next words to come stumbling out of his mouth just about broke me, "I do."
"Do you, Brooklyn Claire Lawson take Alexander William Gaskarth, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish 'till death do you part?"
I wanted to run. I wanted to be free from this, I want to be free from my family. I wanted to be able to live my life for myself, not have anyone else choose how my life will unfold. I wanted to find love, not have some boy that I used to know thrown at me, in hopes that we would fall in love. Because we both know we're totally different people now, it's just not in the cards.
My throat was like the sahara desert as I swallowed, and looked into Alex's eyes. I knew what I had to do, and I know what I wanted to do. I looked towards the back of the church at the double doors and then at Alex once more. It took all of me to get these words out, "I do."
"The rings please." the pastor said.
Our ring bearers came forward, who happened to be Alex's younger cousins, Jade and Michael. They had smiles on their baby faces as they came forward, if only Alex and I were happy about this like they were. Taking the simple silver band from Jade was hard. My hand trembled so much I almost dropped it as I faced Alex. He took my hand and slipped the same type of silver band onto my wedding finger. The tears were swelling in my eyes, I promised myself I wouldn't cry, not until I was alone. My parents couldn't see the tears, Alex couldn't see the tears, I wasn't going to make this harder than it was. I took Alex's large hand in my small ones and slid the ring onto his finger.
"I now pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Gaskarth, you may now kiss the bride."
Alex hand found it's way perfectly just below my chin, guiding my face to look at him. I could no longer hide my tears, the look on his face, he was pained. Discreetly he wiped away the stray tears running down my face, his own face lowering to my height, and kissed me. Short enough for us, and yet long enough for our parents to be happy. It's weird to think, that was our first kiss, definitely not the way I'd picture a first kiss.
The church erupted into applause as Alex grabbed a hold of my hand, and made his way down the aisle with me following behind, putting on a fake smile just like Alex. Outside of the church there waited a limo, with a 'just married' sign on the back. Alex walked down the stairs, telling me to be careful on the stairs, obviously remembering how clumsy I can be. As Alex stuffed the last of my dress into the limo before getting in, our parents came walking out, waving us off, "We'll see you at the reception."
We smiled out the window as the limo drove off into the sunset.
By the way, my name is Brooklyn Marie Lawson, wait strike that. My name is Brooklyn Marie Gaskarth, I'm seventeen and I've just been married, against my will. My husband is Alexander William Gaskarth, twenty years of age, and front man of the band All Time Low. You're probably wondering how the hell did this happen? It's a long story, but I'm sure you've got nothing better to do. See Alex used to live in Britain, as did I. We were neighbors, our parents best friends, and when I was born Alex was three. Our parents thought they'd be smart and set us an arranged marriage for what they thought the appropriate age of twenty and seventeen. As the years went on Alex and I grew close, I guess. We spent a lot of time with eachother when we were younger, best friends our parents called us. We learned to tolerate eachother very well. And when Alex was nine, his parents and him moved to the states. His parents said they'd be seeing us sooner than we thought, I never did understand that.
Not until now, it had been eleven years, and we were no longer the people we used to be. Alex was a famous rockstar in the states, in a band that I had never heard of. And me? Well I was your normal british girl, minus the accent, when I was little I would watch American movies and learned how to talk like them, I used to tell my mom that I would go to the states and find Alex and bring him home. She always laughed and told me, "He'll be home with you soon enough sweetie."
And now that day has come, I've been ripped away from my home, and thrown into a new life of which includes being married to Alex and living together. It's a twisted little story, now isn't it? And to think we had to suffer through a party..and the rest of our lives.
Now I bet you've got this pretty little picture perfect wedding in your head. Alex in a tux, me in a gorgeous white gown, both of our families there, our friends, and both of us with smiles on our faces. But that wasn't the case in this marriage, not by far.
Most people, when they hear those words are happy to be in the situation they're in. But that's most people. There's no silent pause for response. They don't have to think about it, they know that the person standing before them is the one. The one person they are planning to spend the rest of their life with, the one who stole their heart with no intention of giving it back.
The vow, is the most personal, heartfelt, emotional, binding part of the ceremony, and to us, it meant nothing. As he held my hand I looked at everything but his eyes, I was never the one to keep eye contact. That is until he gently squeezed my hand, my eyes made their way from my shoes to his eyes. He searched my eyes, my face, and he knew, I didn't want this. I didn't want to marry him, I didn't want to be the future Mrs. Alex Gaskarth, not in the least. But what I wanted and didn't want didn't matter, it never did. And the next words to come stumbling out of his mouth just about broke me, "I do."
"Do you, Brooklyn Claire Lawson take Alexander William Gaskarth, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish 'till death do you part?"
I wanted to run. I wanted to be free from this, I want to be free from my family. I wanted to be able to live my life for myself, not have anyone else choose how my life will unfold. I wanted to find love, not have some boy that I used to know thrown at me, in hopes that we would fall in love. Because we both know we're totally different people now, it's just not in the cards.
My throat was like the sahara desert as I swallowed, and looked into Alex's eyes. I knew what I had to do, and I know what I wanted to do. I looked towards the back of the church at the double doors and then at Alex once more. It took all of me to get these words out, "I do."
"The rings please." the pastor said.
Our ring bearers came forward, who happened to be Alex's younger cousins, Jade and Michael. They had smiles on their baby faces as they came forward, if only Alex and I were happy about this like they were. Taking the simple silver band from Jade was hard. My hand trembled so much I almost dropped it as I faced Alex. He took my hand and slipped the same type of silver band onto my wedding finger. The tears were swelling in my eyes, I promised myself I wouldn't cry, not until I was alone. My parents couldn't see the tears, Alex couldn't see the tears, I wasn't going to make this harder than it was. I took Alex's large hand in my small ones and slid the ring onto his finger.
"I now pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Gaskarth, you may now kiss the bride."
Alex hand found it's way perfectly just below my chin, guiding my face to look at him. I could no longer hide my tears, the look on his face, he was pained. Discreetly he wiped away the stray tears running down my face, his own face lowering to my height, and kissed me. Short enough for us, and yet long enough for our parents to be happy. It's weird to think, that was our first kiss, definitely not the way I'd picture a first kiss.
The church erupted into applause as Alex grabbed a hold of my hand, and made his way down the aisle with me following behind, putting on a fake smile just like Alex. Outside of the church there waited a limo, with a 'just married' sign on the back. Alex walked down the stairs, telling me to be careful on the stairs, obviously remembering how clumsy I can be. As Alex stuffed the last of my dress into the limo before getting in, our parents came walking out, waving us off, "We'll see you at the reception."
We smiled out the window as the limo drove off into the sunset.
By the way, my name is Brooklyn Marie Lawson, wait strike that. My name is Brooklyn Marie Gaskarth, I'm seventeen and I've just been married, against my will. My husband is Alexander William Gaskarth, twenty years of age, and front man of the band All Time Low. You're probably wondering how the hell did this happen? It's a long story, but I'm sure you've got nothing better to do. See Alex used to live in Britain, as did I. We were neighbors, our parents best friends, and when I was born Alex was three. Our parents thought they'd be smart and set us an arranged marriage for what they thought the appropriate age of twenty and seventeen. As the years went on Alex and I grew close, I guess. We spent a lot of time with eachother when we were younger, best friends our parents called us. We learned to tolerate eachother very well. And when Alex was nine, his parents and him moved to the states. His parents said they'd be seeing us sooner than we thought, I never did understand that.
Not until now, it had been eleven years, and we were no longer the people we used to be. Alex was a famous rockstar in the states, in a band that I had never heard of. And me? Well I was your normal british girl, minus the accent, when I was little I would watch American movies and learned how to talk like them, I used to tell my mom that I would go to the states and find Alex and bring him home. She always laughed and told me, "He'll be home with you soon enough sweetie."
And now that day has come, I've been ripped away from my home, and thrown into a new life of which includes being married to Alex and living together. It's a twisted little story, now isn't it? And to think we had to suffer through a party..and the rest of our lives.