Melt Your Headaches, Call It Home

When I made my way out into the living room in the morning, everyone was up a sitting around on the couches chatting.

"So what are we doing today?" I asked and everyone jumped, apparently I snuck up on them.

"I should call you a Ninja Princess," remarked Jon, "Don't sneak up on us like that."

"Sorry," I said, they just all stared at me. Ok…? I am fully clothed and everything."So what are we doing?"

"We," Brendon exclaimed, breaking their silence and bouncing up to me, "are seeing the most amazing movie of all time!"

"Tell her what it is," ordered Alice, looking up at him adoringly. She is so love struck.

"We are seeing S.I.C.K., better known as Serial Insane Clown Killer!"

My jaw actually dropped.

"Why on earth would we go see THAT?" I asked incredulously.

"I picked it out," said Brendon proudly. I looked around the room, why would any of them be as stupid as to let Brendon pick the movie?

"Well, I assume it would be for the insane serial killer clown that murders a bunch of innocent and scantily clothed blonds," Ryan put in somewhat sarcastically. He also didn't look thrilled about this choice of movie.

"But… I…" I started. I really don't want to go to this movie.

"Why?" They all asked at the same time.

"Well… I kinda, have this super-huge irrational fear of clowns," I admitted.

When I was a toddler, my mom took me to the circus. She tried to introduce me to a clown and I started screaming and crying because it freaked me out or something. What doesn't help is that later that year the movie "It" came out on DVD. Naturally, since my brother had just turned eight, the first chance he got to have a sleepover, he and his friends snuck it in the house and watched it. I wanted to play with the big cool kids, so I forced myself to sit through the movie… its scarred/scared me for life.

"But we want you to go…" whined Brendon and Jon.

"Guys, she doesn't have to go if she doesn't want to go." Ryan looked somewhat relieved that someone else felt the same way and added, "I don't even want to go."

"You two just want to spend the time alone," said Alice smirking, but the only response she got from us were some blushes (me) and eye rolls (him).

"We'll just have to go without you," said Jon snootily as he stood up and linked arms with Alice and Brendon, "We'll see you later this afternoon."

The door shut behind us and Ryan and I were left very alone in my apartment. I kept flitting my eyes to him, scared to make eye contact after what I had heard last night. Somehow knowing that he liked me made me more nervous around him than before when it was just a hope.

"They almost let in too easy with that one…" I observed, usually Alice would've made me come along for support; she'd be terrified at a movie like that.

"Yeah," Ryan agreed, "but I'm not exactly complaining…"

"True," I said, "Now we get to go do something funer."

"Fuh-ner?" I looked up at him, he was laughing at me, he's making fun of my word, "You know funer is not a word."

"Yeah well funer is funer to say than more fun," I argued, crossing my arms.

He just shook his head, "And you want to be journalist…"

"It's not like you're going to go to college ever."

"Ok, ok," he said and then motioned to the door, "Let's just go before we start an argument about grammar."

"Who says I want to go anywhere with you?" I said teasingly.

"I say you want to go anywhere," he said, grabbing me around the waist in a death grip and tugging me towards the door, "Let's go!"

-------------------------------

"Please… dear, God… Ryan… " I huffed, "No… More…"

"But I really like this one –"

"Ryan!" I exclaimed dropping the pile of shirts I was holding, "You get a maximum of 20 shirts… I see 27."

"I want 25."

"Alright 21…"

"24," he argued back.

"21."

"23?"

"21."

"22?"

"21 or I post that picture of you drooling while you were sleeping on one of your fan sites," I said smugly and dumped six shirts in the reject pile.

"But…" he started, but then switched on the charm, "If I can get 22 I'll buy you something nice."

"It has to be under $50," I clarified.

"Fine," he said grumpily, "You can just get me a couple of those for my birthday."

"What day is your birthday?" I asked looking at him curiously as he decided between a blue flowery shirt and a green flowery shirt.

"August 30th," he replied, "Counting today, it's in exactly 60 days."

I froze and felt a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach as I did the calculations in my head, "That means its July 2nd?"

"Yeah," he said as he discarded the blue one and grabbed the ugliest brown pattered shirt ever made.

July 2nd is my birthday. I'm 20 today. I've totally lost track of the date since I've stopped working. I met the guys on the first day of June, it seems like longer than that though. But today marks pretty much the worst day of my life and thanks to these boys I had completely forgotten about it. I'll probably get a call from Ben later, but it's not like I'll hear from mom and dad at all…

Ryan's voice broke into my bad memories of last year but I didn't catch what he said. I glanced vacantly at him holding up two shirts and said, ever so intelligently, "Huh?"

"Which one?" Shaking my head to clear my thoughts I grabbed the hideous brown one and chucked it into the reject pile. Looking right at his face fully for the first time all day, I laughed at his forlorn expression. "I liked that one better," he said, his lip almost forming into a pout.

I patted his arm and assured him that no one else would even like that one. I marched him to the front desk and we paid for the 22 shirts, (even though he tried to stick a 23rd in I caught him.) We walked down the street struggling with the two large bags and so we stopped on the way through the park for a break.

I dropped my bag and sat down heavily on the same bench the paparazzi had captured us at, not too long ago. He sat down beside me and for a few moments I didn't know what to say, but then I asked the question that's been burning on my mind for awhile, "Why did you come after me that night, instead of just calling for help?"

He glanced at me before replying jokingly, "What? Is this our therapy bench?" When he saw that I truly wanted to know, the small smile faded from his lips and he answered seriously, "The truth is… I don't really know. I guess I just couldn't stand there safe while I watched him… hurt you."

"Oh, I just wanted to know… I mean, I don't think that I could've done something like that."

Ryan met my eyes before assuring, "I think you could do a lot of things you think you can't."

I just looked at him before the shared look became to awkward, so I cleared my throat and said, "So… A more pressing question would be: What are we going to do for the 4th of July?"

Caught off guard by the quick change of subject, he only said, "Oh, I don't know…"

"Alice said that her parents are out of town and since they live of the lake we could go there. They always do a really good fireworks display at the park on the opposite side of the lake, we would have a perfect view," I suggested.

"That sounds good. We could set off our own too… We just have to keep Brendon away from the sparklers," Ryan said, laughing at a memory.

"What happened?" I asked, amused. I can only imagine what trouble could ensue from the combination of Brendon and explosives.

He smiled mysteriously, "Let's just say that he has scar from it…"

"I haven't seen it."

This only made him laugh, "Let's hope that you don't. It's not in a place that you would generally go around exposing."

I snickered as I realized what he was talking about, "You guys seem to get into a lot of trouble."

"Yeah," he said, grinning, lost in some memories, "Those were good times."

We lapsed into silence, again, and all I could think of was the conversation I overheard last night. Should I say something? The words just played through my head and that's when I realized. Why are we both playing this stupid game if we both know that we like each other? Why am I waiting for him to make the first move? My mouth went dry, I am either going to ruin one of the best things I have, or I'm going to get something even greater. I really hope for the latter.

"Ryan?" I questioned to get his attention.

"Yeah?" he asked, and as my eyes met his, I could see some uncertainty in their soft, honey brown depths.

"I…" I stumbled over the simple word, "I was… on my balcony last night."

His eyes widened but he didn't say anything, he's going to make me say it, so I continued, "I heard you… and Jon talking… about me." When he still stayed silent, I asked in a rush, "Was any of what you said true?"

Ryan glanced down at his hands and said something so quietly that I couldn't hear, but then he looked back at me and replied, "All of it was true."

I swear my heart actually fluttered. I tried to hide the idiot grin that was trying to fight its way onto my face, "Even the part about you liking me?" I asked.

A smile made its way onto his own lips, "Yeah, especially that part."

That idiot grin burst onto my face and in an extremely bold move I eliminated the six inch space between us, grabbing Ryan's shirt and pulling him to me. As our lips crashed together a warm feeling rushed throughout my body filling me with what I can only describe as pure happiness. I became very aware of where our bodies are touching and there's a buzzing noise in my ear. We pulled away after a few seconds and smiled at each other, my palms started to sweat and my heart started racing. I wanted him.

Our minds seemed to be thinking along the same lines, and we brought our lips together for a second time, but this time it was different. His good hand slid to my face, cupping it, and my hands clenched on the bit of t-shirt I still had in my grip. This kiss was more passionate and more intense. His tongue traced my lip and soon met mine; we drew closer together, if that's even possible.

I don't know how long we were there and only when another couple came walking by did we stop. He took my hands and said, "Charlotte, will you be my girlfriend?"

I smiled even wider, if that's even possible, nodded and said, without thinking, "This was the best birthday present I've ever gotten!"

Ryan blinked, "Birthday present? It's your birthday?"

Shit. "Uh, yeah," I said sheepishly.

"You didn't tell us?" he exclaimed incredulously. He stood up and when I didn't follow he said, "C'mon. We have to go celebrate."

But as he grabbed my hand I resisted his eager tugging, "Ryan, there's a reason I didn't want anyone to know."

His smile fell slightly and he cocked his head curiously, he was baffled, "What reason would that be?"

As I told him of the events that took place on my last birthday his face darkened and he looked almost angry. When I finished, he said, "You know I would never do that to you, right?"

I sent him a small smile and squeezed his hand, "I know. You're better than him; you don't need to convince me. I trust you."

He looked relieved and said, "Good." He pulled out his phone and looked at the clock, "It's five already. We should go."

We'd been at the park for two hours?

"Why?" I whined, this was one of the best afternoon's I've ever had.

"Because we have to celebrate," he said, scrolling through his phone contacts.

Quickly, before he could call or text anyone, I grabbed the phone away, "I just told you –"

"-That you don't want to remember. I know!" he said, "But you're going to have birthdays the rest of your life. If you make this the best birthday you've ever had, you'll remember turning twenty, not nineteen. You're not a teenager anymore."

"I guess," I said resigned, and I reluctantly let him pull me along the park pathway off of the bench, "But nothing big… We can just go out to dinner or something. And no presents!"
He just smirked and said, "Whatever you want," with a mischievous glint in his eye, stealing away his phone and typing madly. I had a sinking feeling that it wouldn't be whatever I want…

After a few blocks Ryan was exhausted from carrying both bags, he insisted that I didn't carry them because 1: they were his shirts, 2: because it was my birthday, and 3: that he was the boyfriend. I just told him that he was being stupid.

After one more block, he begged to take a five minute break, so I hailed a cab. The cab ride was fun… I feel sort of sorry for the driver, but we tipped him extra so he can deal with two young people making out for ten minutes. Of course Ryan demanded that he pay and finally after I relented we made our way up to the apartments.

I walked towards their door, but he swung me back around towards mine, "What about your shirts?" I asked.

He waved them away, opening the door and dumping them just inside.

The apartment was dark.

"How can they not be home?" I remarked as Ryan fumbled for the light switch.

"I don't know," he said letting go of my hand and pushing me farther into the room.

I started, "What are you –" but as the light clicked on an explosion of sound hit me.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" yelled the people that filled my entire apartment.

I looked around shocked at all the people smiling at me, there were streamers from the ceiling and confetti everywhere. I turned back to Ryan with a smile creeping onto my face, "You didn't!"

He just grinned back and said, "Oh yes we did."