Tell Me Angel, Where Are You
Someone Out There Who Feels Just Like Me
About a month had passed since that day.
We all threw Gerard a surprise party and he absolutely loved it. He wasn’t expecting it at all, he thought everyone forgot about him. I actually felt bad because nobody was aloud to wish him a happy birthday until his party. I was chosen to get him away from the house, as well. He kept hinting that it was his birthday, which made me feel worse. But finally, when the party came along, I was able to wish him a well deserved happy birthday. He told me I sucked because he realized what I had done. Which caused everyone to laugh.
Anyway, he loved it. I swear he’s like a six-year-old on Christmas whenever he opens presents. I had given him his deluxe art set with the comic paper I had bought. The paper was pretty cool, it had sections to draw characters and put them into a comic. His hazel orbs gleamed with pure delight from the sight of it. I was nearly broken in half from the thank-you-hug.
I’m glad he had a good birthday, though. He deserved it. He was usually mopey and really didn’t feel like doing anything, lately. Whenever he was like that he usually drank in large proportions.
Me and Frankie celebrated our one month about a week ago. Yes, lame, you might think. However, I don’t really care if you think it’s lame. Maybe you’re just jealous. I don’t know. Well, back to what I was originally saying. We had grown closer and I started missing him whenever he wasn’t around. He started working a lot at music stores selling cd’s and other musical items. I always received a discount, which was pretty wicked. He was getting paid well too, which made him happy.
He had given me a single red rose and a beautiful hand made card. He told me that it was my job to teach the rose to be beautiful and if it were lucky some of my beauty would rub off on it. Yeah, I said ‘aw’ out loud.
The card was beautiful too. He had drawn us as stick figures; yes he’s my little artist, holding a red heart between our hands. On the inside, he told me that I was amazing and that he felt so lucky to have me as his girlfriend along with other things that made me cry.
He was so sweet to me. I slept over his house often, but it’s nothing like what your dirty minds are probably thinking.
We had told his mom a few days after he officially asked me to be his girlfriend. She was thrilled for the both of us. Even though we were together, she still didn’t mind me sleeping over. She said she trusted us to do the right thing.
We still hadn’t said ‘I love you’ to each other yet. I’m not the type of girl that uses such a big phrase such as that right away without completely meaning it. Most couples in school just went out and said ‘I love you’ and broke up days later. That isn’t love, that’s a fling. Actually, most couples did that. They used the word ‘love’ as an average, ordinary, not-so-special word.
Those three little words, those eight tiny letters can have such a vast effect and such a profound meaning. They had more meaning to me then what they used it as. ‘Love’ was emotion felt deep down and connection with another. I didn’t particularly like the definition of it in the dictionary.
Love \’lƏv\ n 1: strong affection 2: warm attachment 3:beloved person.
I mean, you can’t just read the definition. It’s something you have to actually feel to understand. Strong affection? No. It’s much more then that. It’s when you have a passionate connection with someone that reaches levels of understanding and takes commitment. It’s when two people, no matter who they are, are always there for each other, doing anything to make the other happy. That’s what they live for, they live for each other. Whoever made the dictionary should be sued for putting a definition like that in there. I mean, they did the best they could, but maybe it was made by someone who had never felt it.
‘Love’ was something I felt I had lost. My father didn’t love me, if he did, why would he beat me down telling me I wasn’t good enough? My mom and brother had, but they were gone and eventually knowing what it felt like had slipped through my finger like liquid.
Don’t get me wrong, I liked Frankie, more then enough for words. I have since I was little. That feeling never changed.
….
No, that’s a lie. They did change. They grew deeper. They change everyday because the connection I have was indestructible. I thought I had forgotten how to love. But then, there’s Frankie.
He amazed me. He looked past the walls of defense I had strategically built around my heart and the rest of my emotions. But he was determined and fought to tear down all of the walls I’ve been protecting myself behind. I’d hate to let myself be vulnerable for everyone to see. He never gave up on me and never doubted me. He tore down the layers and he wanted to let me out. He wanted me to put myself out there and show the world what I could do. He was always so confident in me, which was a value I lacked for myself. I felt that I wasn’t good enough and he felt that I was too good, that who I was could change the world.
He knew me inside and out. It’s like he could read all my thoughts. Without a word, he’d instantly understand. We’d finish each other’s sentences and he connected with me on such a deeper level then I thought imaginable. To tell you the truth, that sometimes scared me. Well, wouldn’t it scare you too?
Letting people in was so difficult and trust was another value I lacked. My mind was complete auto-pilot, thinking everyone’ll let me down, everyone’ll leave me, and tear me down when I let them see me at a vulnerable stage. Letting someone know all about the secrets you have hidden underneath and letting them know every detail about yourself was terrifying and intimidating.
But I let Frankie in because I had finally let out a bit of trust. I know he was different and I know he’d never try to hurt me. He felt so strongly for me and he’d let it show. I was flattered as well. Someone as perfect as Frankie wanting me as his girlfriend? He was perfect; there’s not a thing I would change about him. He was incredibly tender and caring. Always putting his friends his friends first and wanting what’s best for them. He would always make people smile and get people to laugh whenever they were upset, or just in general. He was so amazing. He made comfortable and my terrified emotions slowly melted away. I was ecstatic to be with him.
I love him and I think I always knew it. I’m such a coward. I wanted to tell him. I never wanted to let him go, ever. I would never find anyone like him. He always laughs at my lame jokes. Always made me smile by the cute things he said. Always made me feel wanted. Always made me feel special. He’d never be embarrassed by me when I acted or said something ridiculous. In fact, he’d always join me. He’d hold my hand, showing me off as his girlfriend. Why would I want anyone else?
He made me such a better person. He was a part of me, he was my other half, he completed me.
I love him so much. I love the feeling he’d give me every time he was around me. Every time he’d smile at me, my spine tingled and butterflies would find their way, once again, into my stomach. And those eyes, those eyes. When he looked at me, it felt like he was deeper then skin, like he could read deeper down. I loved everything about him.
I was in my room, attempting to clean the mess that looked as though it was caused by F5 tornado. It was already May 12. These months were flying right by. Summer was so close you could almost taste it. School would let out soon as well…YES! However, I was still in driver’s ed. But I didn’t mind that because Frankie was in it with me, as was Mikey, and you get to use a car for class. Who wouldn’t love that?
The phone’s ring ricocheted of the walls.
“Hello?”
“Hey, baby.”
“Hey, Frankie,” the corners of my mouth curled into a grin, I love his voice.
“You didn’t make any plans like I told you not to right?”
“Of course not.”
“Took off from work?”
“Yep.”
“Good girl. Now go wait outside cause I’ll be there in a few minutes.”
“Mmkay.”
“Bye, babe.”
“Bye.”
Frankie had kind of been off lately. We were having a tough time meeting up because of both of our jobs. He’d always go talk to Gerard whenever we were hanging out with all our friends. It was strange, but whatever. I was pretty excited. Dad was on a “business trip” for a few weeks. Which means I will have the house all to myself. I am the lady of the house! I was finally going to spend the weekend with Frankie.
I smudged a bit of eyeliner on and put a bit of gel through my hair. I closed my door, grabbing my bag. I grabbed the key from the counter and placed it in my back pocket. I turned the lock on the door and hopped outside. I looked at the handle and was making sure it was locked when two pairs of dirty hands grabbed me and covered my mouth and eyes. A hot breath whispered in my ear,
“Don’t scream, you’re not getting away.”
a/n hey guys. Well I was just checking the amount of people reading my story and like..fourty more people read it, but there weren't any new comments on the comment page. It kind of left me thinking, 'what the hell, why didn't they comment?' so if you read this...could you please comment? It would make me tremendously happy. If I'm happy I write more, thus more of the story is written and put up. So please comment if you read it? :] thanks a bunch
We all threw Gerard a surprise party and he absolutely loved it. He wasn’t expecting it at all, he thought everyone forgot about him. I actually felt bad because nobody was aloud to wish him a happy birthday until his party. I was chosen to get him away from the house, as well. He kept hinting that it was his birthday, which made me feel worse. But finally, when the party came along, I was able to wish him a well deserved happy birthday. He told me I sucked because he realized what I had done. Which caused everyone to laugh.
Anyway, he loved it. I swear he’s like a six-year-old on Christmas whenever he opens presents. I had given him his deluxe art set with the comic paper I had bought. The paper was pretty cool, it had sections to draw characters and put them into a comic. His hazel orbs gleamed with pure delight from the sight of it. I was nearly broken in half from the thank-you-hug.
I’m glad he had a good birthday, though. He deserved it. He was usually mopey and really didn’t feel like doing anything, lately. Whenever he was like that he usually drank in large proportions.
Me and Frankie celebrated our one month about a week ago. Yes, lame, you might think. However, I don’t really care if you think it’s lame. Maybe you’re just jealous. I don’t know. Well, back to what I was originally saying. We had grown closer and I started missing him whenever he wasn’t around. He started working a lot at music stores selling cd’s and other musical items. I always received a discount, which was pretty wicked. He was getting paid well too, which made him happy.
He had given me a single red rose and a beautiful hand made card. He told me that it was my job to teach the rose to be beautiful and if it were lucky some of my beauty would rub off on it. Yeah, I said ‘aw’ out loud.
The card was beautiful too. He had drawn us as stick figures; yes he’s my little artist, holding a red heart between our hands. On the inside, he told me that I was amazing and that he felt so lucky to have me as his girlfriend along with other things that made me cry.
He was so sweet to me. I slept over his house often, but it’s nothing like what your dirty minds are probably thinking.
We had told his mom a few days after he officially asked me to be his girlfriend. She was thrilled for the both of us. Even though we were together, she still didn’t mind me sleeping over. She said she trusted us to do the right thing.
We still hadn’t said ‘I love you’ to each other yet. I’m not the type of girl that uses such a big phrase such as that right away without completely meaning it. Most couples in school just went out and said ‘I love you’ and broke up days later. That isn’t love, that’s a fling. Actually, most couples did that. They used the word ‘love’ as an average, ordinary, not-so-special word.
Those three little words, those eight tiny letters can have such a vast effect and such a profound meaning. They had more meaning to me then what they used it as. ‘Love’ was emotion felt deep down and connection with another. I didn’t particularly like the definition of it in the dictionary.
Love \’lƏv\ n 1: strong affection 2: warm attachment 3:beloved person.
I mean, you can’t just read the definition. It’s something you have to actually feel to understand. Strong affection? No. It’s much more then that. It’s when you have a passionate connection with someone that reaches levels of understanding and takes commitment. It’s when two people, no matter who they are, are always there for each other, doing anything to make the other happy. That’s what they live for, they live for each other. Whoever made the dictionary should be sued for putting a definition like that in there. I mean, they did the best they could, but maybe it was made by someone who had never felt it.
‘Love’ was something I felt I had lost. My father didn’t love me, if he did, why would he beat me down telling me I wasn’t good enough? My mom and brother had, but they were gone and eventually knowing what it felt like had slipped through my finger like liquid.
Don’t get me wrong, I liked Frankie, more then enough for words. I have since I was little. That feeling never changed.
….
No, that’s a lie. They did change. They grew deeper. They change everyday because the connection I have was indestructible. I thought I had forgotten how to love. But then, there’s Frankie.
He amazed me. He looked past the walls of defense I had strategically built around my heart and the rest of my emotions. But he was determined and fought to tear down all of the walls I’ve been protecting myself behind. I’d hate to let myself be vulnerable for everyone to see. He never gave up on me and never doubted me. He tore down the layers and he wanted to let me out. He wanted me to put myself out there and show the world what I could do. He was always so confident in me, which was a value I lacked for myself. I felt that I wasn’t good enough and he felt that I was too good, that who I was could change the world.
He knew me inside and out. It’s like he could read all my thoughts. Without a word, he’d instantly understand. We’d finish each other’s sentences and he connected with me on such a deeper level then I thought imaginable. To tell you the truth, that sometimes scared me. Well, wouldn’t it scare you too?
Letting people in was so difficult and trust was another value I lacked. My mind was complete auto-pilot, thinking everyone’ll let me down, everyone’ll leave me, and tear me down when I let them see me at a vulnerable stage. Letting someone know all about the secrets you have hidden underneath and letting them know every detail about yourself was terrifying and intimidating.
But I let Frankie in because I had finally let out a bit of trust. I know he was different and I know he’d never try to hurt me. He felt so strongly for me and he’d let it show. I was flattered as well. Someone as perfect as Frankie wanting me as his girlfriend? He was perfect; there’s not a thing I would change about him. He was incredibly tender and caring. Always putting his friends his friends first and wanting what’s best for them. He would always make people smile and get people to laugh whenever they were upset, or just in general. He was so amazing. He made comfortable and my terrified emotions slowly melted away. I was ecstatic to be with him.
I love him and I think I always knew it. I’m such a coward. I wanted to tell him. I never wanted to let him go, ever. I would never find anyone like him. He always laughs at my lame jokes. Always made me smile by the cute things he said. Always made me feel wanted. Always made me feel special. He’d never be embarrassed by me when I acted or said something ridiculous. In fact, he’d always join me. He’d hold my hand, showing me off as his girlfriend. Why would I want anyone else?
He made me such a better person. He was a part of me, he was my other half, he completed me.
I love him so much. I love the feeling he’d give me every time he was around me. Every time he’d smile at me, my spine tingled and butterflies would find their way, once again, into my stomach. And those eyes, those eyes. When he looked at me, it felt like he was deeper then skin, like he could read deeper down. I loved everything about him.
I was in my room, attempting to clean the mess that looked as though it was caused by F5 tornado. It was already May 12. These months were flying right by. Summer was so close you could almost taste it. School would let out soon as well…YES! However, I was still in driver’s ed. But I didn’t mind that because Frankie was in it with me, as was Mikey, and you get to use a car for class. Who wouldn’t love that?
The phone’s ring ricocheted of the walls.
“Hello?”
“Hey, baby.”
“Hey, Frankie,” the corners of my mouth curled into a grin, I love his voice.
“You didn’t make any plans like I told you not to right?”
“Of course not.”
“Took off from work?”
“Yep.”
“Good girl. Now go wait outside cause I’ll be there in a few minutes.”
“Mmkay.”
“Bye, babe.”
“Bye.”
Frankie had kind of been off lately. We were having a tough time meeting up because of both of our jobs. He’d always go talk to Gerard whenever we were hanging out with all our friends. It was strange, but whatever. I was pretty excited. Dad was on a “business trip” for a few weeks. Which means I will have the house all to myself. I am the lady of the house! I was finally going to spend the weekend with Frankie.
I smudged a bit of eyeliner on and put a bit of gel through my hair. I closed my door, grabbing my bag. I grabbed the key from the counter and placed it in my back pocket. I turned the lock on the door and hopped outside. I looked at the handle and was making sure it was locked when two pairs of dirty hands grabbed me and covered my mouth and eyes. A hot breath whispered in my ear,
“Don’t scream, you’re not getting away.”
a/n hey guys. Well I was just checking the amount of people reading my story and like..fourty more people read it, but there weren't any new comments on the comment page. It kind of left me thinking, 'what the hell, why didn't they comment?' so if you read this...could you please comment? It would make me tremendously happy. If I'm happy I write more, thus more of the story is written and put up. So please comment if you read it? :] thanks a bunch