Always Searching

I hate waiting rooms. Your appointment is at five but you don't go into the room till 5:15, then the doctor doesn't come until 5:30 so you just sit there twiddling your thumbs for a half-hour.

With nothing to do but read a magazine or think about something else.

Right now I rather read a magazine.

"Bella." a middle-aged woman in scrubs came into the waiting room. I stood up and my mom followed behind me into the area behind the door.

"Alright lets check you height and weight." I nodded and stood on the balance while she wrote down the needed information. "Right this way." she said and turned into a different room with a patient bed in it. She checked my blood pressure and my temperature before leaving us saying "The Doctor will be with you shortly.

Like I said at 5:30.

I sighed as I watched my mom flip through a magazine until I heard the door creak open and an old man know as Dr. Green came in.

"Evening Bella." He said and smiled at me. "Mrs. Parker." he said and shook my moms hand.

The doctor did some basic normal check up things and looked through his records.

"Alright, you haven't had any blood work done in a while so lets get that done right now too." He said writing some things down on a piece of paper.

I nodded as he left and we waited for the nurse again.

I hate waiting.

"Bella you okay?" my mom asked, awhile after the nurse left with samples on my blood.

I shook my head. "What's wrong sweetie?"

"Joe broke up with me." I said softly.

"Aw sweetie." she said and rubbed my knee."What happened?"

"Jason kissed me and Joe thinks I kissed him." I told her looking at a tile on the ground.

"Did you?"

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "Nick didn't even stand up for me and neither did Kevin. They are suppose to be my family but Nick basically called me a slut."

"Thats just not right. I'll have a talk with Denise and -"

I shook my head. "It's not worth it."

Before my mom could say another word the doctor came in with his results.
He didn't smile this time at us. He looked like he was trying to figure out the right words to say. He sat in his chair reading a paper several times before sighing.

"Is everything okay?" My asked concerned.

"I'm afraid not Mrs. Parker." he said softly and looked at me.

I was scared. What could that one piece of paper cause my doctor to be so tongue tied.

"I'm afraid Bella has cancer."

Yep. That could make me tongue tied.

"What! " my mom gasped. I was staring at the Dr. Green and he was looking right back at me. I couldn't move, I couldn't blink, I couldn't breathe.

Dr. Green nodded and removed his eyes from me and towards my mom. "The test shows she has traces of Leukemia." He said and turned back towards me. "Bella this is very important." I nodded and he continued. "Have you had any fevers or headaches lately?"

"Maybe a headache or two," I stated and he nodded.

"Feeling tired? Pain in your bones or joints?" I stared at him for a second trying to think and when I did, I noticed I was having them.

I nodded. "Alright Mrs. Parker, I'll give you some good doctors and places to have your daughter checked out with them."

"She's only seventeen." My mom gasped running her hands through her hair.

Dr. Green nodded. "It happens even at her age. I'm sorry Mrs. Parker."

My mom nodded. "Where's the best cancer treatment place?"

"In New Jersey?"

"No the Country."

He nodded. "There's a really good one out in California."

California.

"Can you give me information for that place." my mom asked. He nodded and let us leave once my mom was handed the papers.

"Bella make sure you stay calm and try not to stress out on things."He told me.

I nodded."Thank you."

Maybe California will be a good thing. I can get out of here from Jason, Mandy, Nick, Kevin, and even Joe. They might be going on tour soon but that doesn't mean they wont be back.

I don't want them to know. I don't want fake pity.