This Tragic Affair

The first week was the hardest. Everyday, creeping down the freezing halls, sneaking into the room like criminals walking through a bank, then just waiting- hours and hours of waiting, of praying, of wishing that she’d wake up. Her eyes just stayed shut. They didn’t twitch like they do when you’re dreaming, they just stayed.

The worst was when the doctors would visit. Their faces were etched, frozen to their skulls. It wasn’t that they didn’t want to show their thoughts through their faces, it was the opposite in fact; their thoughts read, it’s just that they weren’t very optimistic thoughts. From what we could piece together, Natallie had passed out on the track, unconscious and at one point dead. We heard that she had been without oxygen for at least ten minutes. There was high potential for brain damage, but the sooner she woke up, the less it would be.

“Please Nat,” I often found myself whispering through tears. “Wake up. Let me see that smile again.” I wanted nothing more than to just take her hand and let her know I was there, but I knew there was no way I could do that. I took Ronnie’s instead. He had come with me every trip, without question, and stayed with me for a while once we got home. I don’t know how he could handle it, but I was thankful for it just the same.

I sat for a moment just staring at the IV lines. ‘Pull yourself together,’ I found myself thinking. ‘We need to stay strong for her.’

“Do you remember the times my dad would take us to get Boca burgers, Nat?” I asked with a shaky smile. “You practically inhaled those things… When you wake up, I’ll bring you one with a Dr. Pepper, because that’s always what you got. You were always done before we got to your house,” I laughed. “Do you remember that?” I watched her for a second, half hoping that something would happen.

Nothing from Nat, but Ronnie had decided to join the conversation.

“Come on Nat,” he smiled. “You’ve got to be tired of the hospital food. I don’t even have to eat it and I’m sick of it.”

It occurred to me that I had never introduced them. Better late than never, right?

“Nat, this is Ronnie.” I placed a hand on his arm, watching his face as I broke the ice between them. “He’s been helping me out since I died. He’s taught me a lot about how things in the Afterlife work, and even how some stuff here works. It’s funny what you’d miss… I’ve told him all about you, and he comes with me when I visit you sometimes... He’s kind of my guardian angel.” I guess I kind of whispered the last part, because Ronnie looked at me like he hadn’t heard me right. After a second though, he gave me a small, sort of tired smile and brushed a soft kiss across my lips. Then he leaned back in his chair, still wearing that same smile, and closed his eyes. He looked so peaceful.

He didn’t speak for a while, just smiled that boyish smile, his snake bits quivering a little with each breath, hair draped like feathers across his forehead. His skin had a soft glow in the dimming light of the room, and it felt soft under my fingers. I don’t think I had even seen him look so beautiful…

“Well,” he whispered after a small eternity. His eyes flickered slowly open and held my gaze. “Let’s get you home. I’m sorry Natallie” he smiled her way, “but I’m going to have to steal her away for a little while.”

“Don’t worry; we’ll be back tomorrow.” I made a move to get up, with a little help from Ronnie, and stepped a little closer to the bed. I smiled down at my best friend, feeling bittersweet about it all. “I love you so much…” Ronnie wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pulled me toward the door, enveloping me in his warmth as he guided me down the hallways. Before I knew it, we were settled onto my couch.

He didn’t say anything. I didn’t say anything. I just rested my head on his chest and listened to rhythm of his breathing, like a lullaby as he gently ran his fingers through my hair. I reveled in the softness of the moment, resting a hand just above his heart as my eyes drifted shut.