Navigate Me

It was a Thursday night, the second week of summer break, and Zephyr had made no real plans for the evening. He’d been offered to go to the movies with Mike and Daniel, but for some reason he’d turned said offer down. He just hadn’t felt like going much anywhere. Instead, he could now be found in his room, lying on his bed and listening to Motion City Soundtrack. He kept tossing his worn plush kitten up in the air and catching it on the way down, waiting a few seconds before repeating the process. As there was a knock on the door, he caught the kitten and put it aside on the bed before calling out to whoever it was to enter.

The door opened to reveal his older cousin (one of many) Brendon, his eyebrows rising as he spotted Zephyr on the bed. “You sick, li’l bro?”

“No...” Zephyr replied, somewhat confused. “Do I look sick?”

“It’s summer vac, eight o’clock on a great Thursday evening and you’re in bed – sure looks like you ain’t okay..!” Brendon came into the room, giving Zephyr a push to move over (not really needed since the bed was a double bed). Flopping down next to his younger cousin, the older boy tilted his head to look at him. “This a normal pastime for you?”

“No, I’m just trying to avoid you.”

“You didn’t even know I was in the house.”

Brendon’s grin was infectious and Zephyr couldn’t help chuckling. “You’d be surprised at what I know.”

“You don’t know why I’m here, though.”

No, Zephyr really didn’t. But knowing Brendon, it was highly likely it was something bound to upset Zephyr’s mother, should she find out. “What?” he asked as he sat up, looking down on Brendon.

“Wanna go to a club?”

Zephyr snorted. “I’m fifteen, I don’t get in anywhere.”

“Not on you own you don’t, but you’ll be with me, li’l bro. I’ll get you in, trust me.”

“You saying that makes me feel I probably shouldn’t.”

The expectant look on Brendon’s face didn’t quite convince Zephyr, but he nodded nevertheless. His cousin had yet to disappoint him with his ideas. At the approval, Brendon just about bounced up off the bed, grinning wide.

“Get a clean shirt and we’ll leave.”

“This shirt is cl—”

“Is not. Stain.” Brendon jabbed a finger in his chest, pointing out the ice cream stain Zephyr had acquired without noticing a few hours earlier.

Rolling his eyes, the younger boy slipped the shirt over his head, discarding it on the floor before walking over to his closet and picking out a clean one. Pulling on a red hoodie as well, he then followed Brendon out the door, idly wondering what tonight would be all about.

“A gay club?”

Zephyr looked at the entrance to the building, the people coming and going, with a deep frown. It wasn’t that he disapproved of it, not at all... He just hadn’t been expecting it. Not even from Brendon. His cousin was right behind him, chuckling and putting his hands on Zephyr’s shoulders.

“Zeph, don’t sound so negative. It’s a great place..!”

“Since when are you gay, anyway?” Zephyr queried as he was ushered towards the entrance.

“Hah, I’m not, but this place doesn’t throw you out if you’re straight. Just don’t expect to find any girls to pick up in here.”

Zephyr half expected not to get in, but Brendon apparently knew the guys at the door and suddenly they were in the middle of everything. And it was quite something, too; dance floors, a bar, an empty cage (for, Zephyr assumed, some kind of dancer), lots of people dancing or seated at the small tables all around or on the couches lining the walls here and there. And everywhere you looked, you couldn’t spot a single woman. Not that Zephyr lacked things to look at – people in here dressed in all kinds of fashions, some more provoking than others.

Brendon leaned in and pointed in the direction of the bar, indicating that Zephyr go there as he obviously had to find a friend or something that Zephyr didn’t quite catch. Not really sure what to do, he followed the advice and found himself a seat at a table neat the bar. He’d never been much of a people watcher, but whilst getting used to the surroundings and waiting for Brendon to return, it was a very interesting way to pass the time.

When someone sat down on the chair next to him, Zephyr of course thought it was his cousin, which was why he was more than a little surprised to find a complete stranger at his table, watching him with his head slightly tilted to the left. Not knowing what to say, Zephyr resorted to surveying the other boy. He was probably a few years older than himself, had chestnut brown hair that fell in his blue eyes and the shadow of a cheeky smile on his lips. He was probably regarding Zephyr with the same attention Zephyr was looking at him.

After a few moments of neither one of the boys saying anything, the stranger boy spoke up. “How old are you?”

“...Eighteen.” Yeah, that sounded convincing as hell.

“Right...” The smile grew a little. “And how old are you really?”

Zephyr played with the drawstrings of his hoodie. “Eighteen, I told you.”

The boy gave an odd chuckle. “Yeah, I got that, but how old are you really? I won’t tell, I promise.”

Looking at the other for a few moments, Zephyr didn’t contemplate whether or not to answer, as much as he battled his sudden loss of confidence.

“...I’m fifteen.”

The boy nodded. “I might have believed seventeen, but not eighteen.” He offered a hand. “Jared.”

“Zeph.” The handshake was quick, or so Zephyr intended, but this Jared-person wouldn’t let go.

“Seth?”

“Zeph. Short of Zephyr.”

“Ah, okay... New around here?”

“Yeah, my cousin took me here.”

Jared laughed. “Some cousin you have..! And now he’s left you alone?”

“Nah, he went to look for a friend, he’ll be back.”

“Depends on what kinda friend he meant, doesn’t it?”

The wink Jared gave him caused an odd tingle in Zephyr’s stomach and he retrieved his hand with a slight tug. Still, the boy had awoken his interest.

“How old are you?” he asked in return.

“Age doesn’t matter much in this place. But I’m nineteen.” Jared changed his seat slightly, discreetly moving closer to Zephyr. “So, what’s a nice boy like you doing in a place like this?”

The first thing that came into Zephyr’s mind also slipped over his lips before he could help himself. “That’s such a lame pick-up line.”

Jared chuckled again. “Give me a better one, then. You’re fifteen, I’m sure you know what works.”

The jab didn’t pass over Zephyr’s head, but he raised an eyebrow. Pick-up lines weren’t really his thing, but this wasn’t a very serious occasion, so why not give it a shot? “Did it hurt?”

“...What?”

“When you fell from the sky?”

Jared rolled his eyes. “That’s so straight.”

“What did you expect from a straight guy?”

It was Jared’s turn to raise eyebrows now. “Really? You serious?”

Zephyr couldn’t help grinning. “Did I disappoint you now?”

“Of course I’m disappointed,” Jared said, looking gravely serious. “Who wouldn’t be, faced with a guy like you and finding out he’s off-grounds?”

“You don’t even know me,” Zephyr snorted, but he couldn’t help feeling oddly flattered.

“Who cares if I know you or not? I want you for your good looks, not your personality or brains.”

This statement caused Zephyr to stop for a moment, and it would make a long-lasting impression on him. For the moment however, he just smirked at the boy before him.

“If I gave into that, I’d be a slut.”

Obviously, Jared had no issues whatsoever with this. “I wouldn’t mind. It’d make things way easier for me.”

By now, Zephyr realised the other boy had his hand on his leg and for a moment there was a make-or-break silence when the two young men looked at each other. As Jared’s hand moved up slightly, the blue eyes blinked once.

“I’m afraid I only know straight pick-up lines,” Zephyr said, clearing his throat.

“We could just skip the pick-up,” Jared suggested, shrugging one shoulder.

“What makes you think I’d wanna go with you in the first place?” Zephyr managed to sound cockier than he actually felt.

Slowly walking his fingers up to Zephyr’s neck, Jared idly played with the other boy’s hair. “You’ve never thought about it? Been curious?”

“Never really had a reason to.” Zephyr closed his eyes for a moment, realising he actually enjoyed the feeling or Jared’s fingers in his hair.

In the next moment, Jared’s mouth was right by his ear, breath hot as a whisper was heard through the music. “I can give you a reason.”

When the older man kissed his ear, gently sucking on his earlobe, Zephyr was surprised to find he didn’t mind at all. “Could you really?” he said with a slight shiver to his voice.

“If you want me to, of course.” Jared smiled at Zephyr’s lack of averseness. “If not, I’ll stop wasting my time.”

Turning his head to meet the other boy’s eyes, Zephyr cocked an eyebrow. “You’re never wasting time on me.”

The proximity of their faces to each other was indeed very distracting and Zephyr quenched a shiver. Jared got a very tricky look on his face, making kissy lips at Zephyr, who smirked and shook his head. As Jared’s free hand found its way in under his hoodie, fingertips pushing the t-shirt up slightly, Zephyr both found it odd that he still didn’t object, as well as seeing no reason to do so. Jared’s fingers slowly moved higher, exploring more and more of Zephyr’s skin, as their faces inched closer and closer to each other.

“What’s going on here?”

Zephyr almost fell off his chair at the sound of Brendon’s voice, in passing noticing how Jared’s hand lost contact with his waist. Regaining his composure somewhat, he looked up at his cousin, seeing the suspicious look in the other’s eyes as Brendon looked from Zephyr to Jared and back.

“Everything alright, Zeph?”

“Yeah, we’re just talking. This is Jared,” Zephyr said as casually as he could manage.

You could tell Brendon wasn’t convinced as he sat down at the table. “Right. Discussing anything interesting?”

“Very,” Jared replied with a small smile. “Nice place to take an underage kid.”

“What doesn’t harm him, fortifies him, right?”

With a nod and an ‘I guess so’ expression, Jared stood up to leave. As he passed behind Zephyr, his fingers graced the younger boy’s neck, causing Zephyr to yet again quench an urge to shiver. He found himself oddly annoyed with Brendon for interrupting, but smiled as his cousin made a remark about the strange people you could meet in a place like this. As the other man kept on talking, Zephyr told himself it was all for the better. The heat of the moment, he thought to himself, that was all; it would’ve been stupid to actually have let Jared do something beyond what he’d already done. ‘Don’t do anything you can’t stand for’ his mother had always told him. Even if most of his other family members more or less said to throw those words to the wind, Zephyr actually thought they made a valid point. Not that he’d be a good follower of them as he grew older, but that was a later concern.

It turned out that Brendon hadn’t found the friend he’d been looking for, but he and Zephyr were nevertheless joined by a few other of Brendon’s acquaintances. After a while of being half-engaged in the conversation, Zephyr excused himself and went to have a proper look around the place. He wasn’t in the mood for dancing – doubted he’d even fit in on the dance floor – but one part of his was subconsciously hoping to find Jared. Apparently, he had awoken some kind of curiosity in Zephyr – the boy just wasn’t sure what kind. Making his way along the side of the dance floor, Zephyr’s eyes idly skimmed the moving crowds of people, but when he actually did find the one he’d been looking for, it wasn’t on the dance floor but by the side of it.

Jared was sitting on one of the couches, conversing with someone and Zephyr stopped a bit away. He didn’t want to go up to the other, not at the risk of making a complete fool of himself if it turned out Jared had just been playing with him for his own amusement. Standing there watching the older boy, when Jared seemed to notice he was being watched and started looking around, Zephyr turned away. He wasn’t even sure what he was doing at that point. Maybe he should just forget about it and go back to Brendon and his friends, hang out with them and then go home. He was just about to turn and leave when a hand graced his shoulder. Looking to the left there was no one there, but when turning his head to the right he was met by a quick kiss, right on the lips. Confused and surprised, Zephyr took two steps back, now seeing Jared properly.

The other boy was smiling. “Why hello there, Zeph. Imagine running into you again. Unless...” he examined his nails with pretended deliberation, “...you were looking for me?”

“No,” Zephyr said, shaking his head even though it was obvious Jared knew that was the case. “Just looking around the place.”

“Anything in particular catching your interest?” The look in Zephyr’s eyes said more than necessary and Jared chuckled. “Come here, let me show you something.”

Somewhat hesitantly, Zephyr followed to a slightly more secluded area of the club, away from the immediate buzz and alarm of the dance floor. There were booths here, offering a bit more privacy and as Jared ushered him into one, Zephyr still wasn’t sure where he wanted this to go.

Jared sat down next to him on the couch, fiddling with a coin. “So, Zephyr... Enjoying your stay?”

“It’s nice to be able to talk without shouting,” Zephyr stated, avoiding the question.

Jared chuckled. “Yeah, sometimes you prefer a calmer atmosphere.” Looking over at the younger boy, he tilted his head. “You look terribly torn. What’s on your mind?”

After going over a million different answers in his head, Zephyr came out with, “You,” followed by a nervous chuckle.

“Me, really?” Jared leaned in, kissing Zephyr’s ear again. “Or the things I do?”

His breath against Zephyr’s neck caused the younger boy to shiver anew. “I don’t know... You haven’t done much yet.”

“Would you like me to?” Accompanied by another kiss on the ear.

A pause, and a decision. “...Yes.”

As Jared’s hand once again found its way in under Zephyr’s shirt at the same time as his lips kissed Zephyr’s neck, the younger boy bit his lip and closed his eyes, actually allowing himself to enjoy the feeling full on. When Jared pushed him against the wall of the booth, Zephyr merely let out a whine of caution at the change of position. He was amazed at his good this all felt and when Jared unzipped his hoodie, Zephyr didn’t make a sound. Hands exploring, lips against skin, Zephyr’s body reacting... It was with a blush he met Jared’s eyes as his hips met the other boy’s abdomen, that blush deepening when Jared’s hand graced the front of his jeans.

Jared smirked. “Not all that bad, is it?”

Zephyr just shook his head, closing his eyes as Jared’s strokes grew firmer. Jared’s lips on his again and now Zephyr finally gave a proper response, putting one hand behind the other boy’s head and deepening the kiss. Just like kissing a girl, no stranger than that. The appreciative hum Jared gave made Zephyr smile into the kiss, his other hand finding its way in under Jared’s button-down shirt. When Jared’s fingers graced the lining of his jeans, Zephyr broke the kiss to place a hand on the other boy’s.

Jared paused, lifting his head a little. “What..?” he said in a half-whisper.

Zephyr wasn’t quite sure. “I don’t... I haven’t... I’m not...”

The older boy smiled slightly. “Don’t worry, I’ll be nice.”

“Yeah, but... I’m not gay.”

The statement seemed both lame and utterly ridiculous under the current circumstances, but Jared just nodded thoughtfully. Zephyr bit his lip again, painfully aware of the placement of Jared’s fingers.

“You don’t have to be anything,” the other boy said, almost matter-of-factly as he moved down a little, pushing Zephyr’s shirt up and placing a kiss on his belly button. “No harm in trying out new things.”

With that, Jared unbuckled Zephyr’s belt and unbuttoned his jeans, tugging them halfway down on his thighs. Kissing the newly exposed skin, he had Zephyr cringing at the light touches. Teasing around the edge of the boy’s underwear, Jared took pleasure in the strained noises Zephyr gave off, as if keeping quiet was of utter need. As he pulled the underwear and jeans down to Zephyr’s knees, Zephyr looked up at the ceiling in an attempt to clear his mind. As soon as Jared’s lips touched his erection, it was a futile task. Gasping, Zephyr clenched his hand on the back of the couch, biting down hard on his lower lip.

“Fuck... Stop teasing and do something.”

“I thought you weren’t gay?” Jared smirked, flicking is tongue across the head of Zephyr’s penis.

“Shut up,” Zephyr let out in a growl.

“Or what?”

“Or I’ll make you suck.” The words sounded so very odd.

Jared raised his eyebrows. “Someone’s in denial of their sexuality.”

“Don’t have to be anything, right?” Zephyr threw Jared’s own words back at him. “I’m just enjoying the sensation.”

Jared smirked again. Always that smirk. “I’ll make you enjoy it even more, then.”

As he took Zephyr into his mouth, the younger boy let out a moan and closed his eyes for a moment. The sensation was amazing, unlike any experience he’d had with girls (fairly limited, but nothing to be ashamed of) and he thought he could definitely get used to it. His moans grew louder the longer Jared worked him over, Zephyr’s hips moving upwards. Jared’s hands came down on them, gently but firmly holding them down as he started sucking harder. Zephyr’s head fell back against the wall and he knew he couldn’t take much more of this. Just when he thought he would lose it, he felt Jared’s mouth leave him and when he opened his eyes with a frown, it was to see the older boy looking at him with a smirk.

“What are you doing?” Zephyr asked, almost snapping at the other.

“I want you to beg me.”

The words at first didn’t make any sense. Yes, Zephyr’s mind was quite shot at that point. “Beg you to what?”

“To get you off.”

At this, Zephyr surprised himself with a derisive scoff. “Hell no.”

Jared raised his eyebrows again. “What’s that, Zeph?”

“I’m not gonna beg.” Zephyr locked eyes with Jared. “You’re gonna finish what you started.”

“What if I don’t care for your attitude?”

Not sure whether the other boy was being serious, Zephyr suddenly felt much less confident. The urgent heat in his abdomen was almost painful and as much as he didn’t want to lower himself to begging, he neither wanted to risk Jared actually giving up on him. The indecisiveness must’ve been written on his face, because Jared gave a snort and ran his finger along the younger boy’s length, the touch causing Zephyr to shiver.

“Well, Zeph... What’s it gonna be?”

At first, Zephyr barely mouthed the word, yet it took a lot of willpower to do so. “Please...” he then reluctantly mumbled, eyes averted.

“Can’t hear you...”

Zephyr repeated the word, a little louder, but still to no help. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew that begging would always be his last resort when it came to matters of this kind. It really was a despicable feeling – but his need for release was overpowering.

“Please..!” he whined, the urgency in his voice battling with the heavy reluctance.

He was rewarded with Jared’s mouth taking him in again, as the other boy obviously thought he had tormented Zephyr enough. Keeping quiet wasn’t an option anymore as Zephyr arched his back up from the seat, letting out short-cut moans and trembling as he released himself into Jared’s mouth. Slowly relaxing he sank back against the couch, eyes closed and breaths deep. When he felt another body next to him, Zephyr opened his eyes to find Jared nestled by his shoulder, and affectionate smirk on his face.

“So innocent...” he teased, stroking Zephyr’s hair. “So young and unspoiled.”

Zephyr wanted to swat the other’s hand away, but all he managed was a disapproving groan, causing Jared to chuckle. The older boy placed a hand on Zephyr’s stomach, letting it rest there as he leaned in to kiss the younger boy, very gently and just once.

“You were good,” Jared pointed out. “For a first-timer.”

“You weren’t half-bad yourself.” Zephyr was surprised at how quickly he regained confidence now the whole thing had passed. Pushing himself up in a sitting position, at the same time pulling up his underwear and jeans, he then looked at Jared with a small smile. “You made me curious now.”

“Curious about what?”

Zephyr changed his seat, leaning closer. “Curious for more.”

Jared laughed quietly. “One thing at the time, little boy. You don’t go from straight to gay over a blowjob. No matter how good it might’ve been.”

Feeling there was something he should say, Zephyr averted his eyes as he tried to find the right words. After a few silent moments, his head was gently forced up by two fingers and he met Jared’s blue eyes.

“Run along home, Zeph. This is no place for a little boy like yourself.” He grinned. “Come back when you’ve made up you mind.” As Zephyr opened his mouth to say something, Jared’s fingers came down on his lips, effectively silencing him. “Shh. Make up your mind and come back.” Jared lowered his hand. “Now I have to find my friends. You track down your brother—”

“Cousin,” Zephyr interjected.

“Go find your cousin and think about it.”

And with that, Jared was gone in the same odd fashion he’d arrived. Left alone in the booth now, still comfortably relaxed, Zephyr let his head fall back and stared up into the ceiling. A lot of thoughts buzzed around in his mind, not one of them wanting for take proper shape. Without really noticing it, the boy closed his eyes and dozed off.

“Zeph? Zephyr? Thank god, it’s him...”

“A bit too late for him, is it?”

“I bet he had too much to drink.”

Laughter.

“I doubt he’s had anything to drink at all since we got here, to be honest. Zeph?”

Someone shook him by the shoulders, gently, and Zephyr slowly came to life, blinking owlishly. The first thing that met him was his cousin’s face with a mixed expression of worry and amusement. Brendon raised an eyebrow as his younger relative sat up, rubbing his eyes.

“Morning, sleepyhead,” he smiled. “How long have you been out?”

“I don’t know...” Zephyr mumbled sleepily. “What time is it?”

Brendon sat down next to him. “Three o’clock in the morning, they’re closing the place. Couldn’t find you anywhere, thought you’d left or something. Your mum would kill me if I came home without you..!”

Zephyr didn’t answer; instead he looked around, subconsciously searching for Jared. Of course he was nowhere to be found – the only other persons around besides Zephyr and his cousin was a few of Brendon’s friends, watching them from a distance. With a sting of disappointment, Zephyr resigned to the fact of Jared’s absence with a slight frown.

“You alright, Zeph?” Brendon sounded concerned.

“Yeah, I’m fine... A little tired, is all.”

His cousin laughed. “Maybe all-night clubbing isn’t quite your thing yet. Better wait until you get older, huh?”

The playful jab in his side cause Zephyr to make a face at the older boy, but he got to his feet and moved out of the booth. “Are we leaving, or what?”

“Right, guys,” Brendon declared to his friends as he got up. “Gotta take the baby boy home to sleep. I’ll catch up with you tomorrow, okay?”

As Brendon pulled his car up outside the way residence, Zephyr made to get out but was halted by his cousin’s hand on his arm. Looking back, he found Brendon looking at him with a thoughtful frown.

“...What?”

“What were you doing, sleeping in that booth?”

“...Think about what you just said.”

Withdrawing his hand, Brendon shook his head. “No, I mean... Nevermind. Did you have a good time tonight?”

Zephyr nodded, and he wasn’t lying either. “Yeah, thanks for taking me.”

“Sorry for leaving you on your own like that.”

“It’s okay, nothing happened.” Nothing bad, anyway. “I’m fifteen, I can take care of myself.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of.”

“Say what?”

Brendon finally smiled. “Get inside, li’l bro, and don’t wake your parents up. They’ll throw a fit over me bringing you home this late.”

“Early,” Zephyr corrected with a grin. “And mum probably threw a fit over you taking me out in the first place.”

“Get out of my car, Zephyr Way.”

Brendon laughed, giving Zephyr a light shove, and the younger boy got moving again. Zephyr watched his cousin drive off before turning towards the house, making his way to his room as silently as possible. Closing the door behind him, he shrugged off his hoodie and tossed it over the back of his desk chair. Getting out of his t-shirt and discarding it on the floor, he realise he hadn’t eaten anything for quite a few hours and was quite hungry. Still, he didn’t want to risk waking his parents up by going in the kitchen, so he pulled out a desk drawer and got out a small pack of Skittles. Opening it and downing about one third of its contents in one mouthful, he went over to his bed and lay down, one hand under his head and the other continuously supplying his mouth with more Skittles. Once again looking up at the ceiling, he felt the drowsiness coming back to him, the buzz of thoughts likewise. His eyes however grew heavier and heavier, and once he’d finished the pack of Skittles, it was with a yawn that he unbuckled his belt and made away with his jeans. For a moment, his mind went back to the club, him and Jared in that booth, but ultimately he was too tired to make anything of it. Rolling over on his side, he got under the covers and buried his head in the two pillows he always slept with. Just before he fell asleep, Zephyr reached out for his plush kitten, snuggling the stuffed toy under his chin and was out in a matter or seconds.