Fake It Like You Matter

"Dude!? Where have you been all my life?!" I verbally accosted Jessa when I walked into work on Wednesday morning. "I haven't had anyone to talk to for over a day!"

"Sorry?" She tried.

I immediately launched into the story of Pete at the therapists office, then the phone call and finished with, "So now I'm meeting up with him tonight. Can you believe that?!"

"I knew it." She just shrugged, "I totally knew it."

I had a great afternoon despite the fact that I was working. I sang along and danced to every song that came on the radio, and I'm sure my co-workers were sick of me by 7:00pm.

I checked my hair in the bathroom before leaving, it was a little out of control, as usual, but I sort of liked it that way. I jumped into my car, a little black Mazda that my dad had bought me for my 17th birthday that I rarely drove (global warming = bad, exercise = good). My skate board was usually all I needed. Unless it was snowing.

Twenty minutes later I was rolling up outside a very nice 3 story brick house in an upper middle class neighborhood, parking in the street and walking up the driveway to the door.

After ringing the doorbell and a few moments had passed, the front door opened and Pete was standing there in jeans and a black t-shirt with weird pink bats on it. I felt awkward as all hell but a smile stretched across his face when he saw me.

Flip Flop. That damn smile.

"Hi," I managed.

"Hey, you found it." He said and welcomed me into the giant foyer, "You can leave your shoes there, and um... Have you eaten?"

I shook my head and slipped my shoes off.

"Okay, we'll order pizza," He said decidedly then added, "We have the house all to ourselves tonight."

He took me to his kitchen and we both peered into the fridge.

"Want something to drink?" He asked, "You name it, we've got it. Soda, juice, milk, water, blood of the innocent..."

I laughed, and grabbed myself a can of Coke, "I think this will do."

He grabbed himself a can as well and we sat down at the table. We drank our sodas and didn't really say much at first.

"You don't have to be nervous around me." He mumbled suddenly, "I mean, you might not have a lot to go on, but I'm actually an okay guy."

"Sure," I nodded, "I trust you."

"You trust me already?"

"I probably shouldn't, hey?" I smirked and shrugged, "I always assume I can trust everyone. It's just a habit of mine, but kind of gets me hurt sometimes."

"I'm not going to hurt you again," He fidgeted with the tab on his soda can.

"Now who's nervous?" I made a little face at him and he laughed, "What are we doing tonight, anyways?"

"Well," He found a fresh batch of confidence, "I wanted to watch a movie with you, and I kind of had one in mind. Do you like John Cusack?"

"Actually, I bite my thumb at anyone who thinks John Cusack is anything less than brilliant," I said then paused, "Do you like John Cusack?"

"Yeah," He laughed and motioned for me to follow him out of the kitchen again. He began leading me up the stairs, "But if I didn't, I would probably lie, because I'm a little bit afraid of you."

I giggled, "Don't worry, I'm all talk."

"I'll keep that in mind."

After two flights of stairs, he opened a door that I figured was his room, but instead the door revealed another narrow flight of stairs.

"My bedroom is the attic." He explained as we continued climbing.

"Mine too."

"Really?"

I nodded and looked around, noticing the posters covering the walls, the guitars lying around, CD's everywhere and a few old notebooks on the table next to his bed.

"Our bedrooms are surprisingly similar" I mentioned as he dug through some movies. "But my clothes are everywhere, too."

"Yeah, I cleaned for you, so..." He turned to me and held up a VHS with a satisfied look, "Found it."

"Serendipity?" I raised my eyebrows, "That's a really sweet movie."

"Well, seeing you at Dr. Adams office made me think of it..." He shrugged, "I mean, if you meet someone once, its just like, whatever, right? But what where the chances of us running into each other again like that? It was serendipitous."

"It was sort of obvious before then that we both had some issues, so it shouldn't really be that surprising we ran into each other there," I chuckled, "But I suppose there may have been a certain amount of serendipity involved."

"So what do you see him for?" Pete asked setting up the movie, "If you don't want to tell me its totally fine..."

"My stepmother thought it would be good for me." I explained, making myself comfortable next to him on the floor, "The thing is I wouldn't really have much to talk about in therapy if it weren't for her."

"Is she horrible?"

"She's something," I sighed, and nudged him with my shoulder, "What about you? What are you in for?"

"The official term is Manic Depression," He admitted, "It's um... It sounds a lot worse than it is. I'm alright, I just have ups and downs sometimes, you know? Don't like, go and get all weird because I told you now, okay? Because I'm fine, and it's really not-"

I leaned forward and put my hand over his mouth.

"I'm not going to wig out on you," I promised making hardcore eye contact with him for the first time since we had met in Starbucks, then pulling my hand away, "It'll take more than that to scare me off."

A smile crept across his lips. Wow, he had really nice lips. He put his arm around me and pushed play.