Random Days of the Marauders

Disclaimer: I do not own James, Sirius, Remus, Peter, Snape or Lily. I may own some future characters of my own creation.

Notepassing

J: I can’t BELIEVE McGonagle gave us detention…again.

R: What part of that can’t you believe?

J McGonagle gave us detention.

R: Yes, I know that but why can’t you believe it?

J: I don’t think me and Padfoot did anything wrong.

M: *Sigh*

J: Moony, I already heard your sigh. You don’t need to write it down.

R: It’s to be dramatic. Anyways, James,

J: IT’S PRONGS!!

R: Don’t snatch away the paper while I’m writing on it! And what does it matter? They’re both you.

J: I don’t want any secret wizard organization to discover that I wrote this! That’s the whole reason why we came up with the Marauder’s nicknames! Jeez, Moony.

R: Oh, my bad. I thought the reason was because you and Sirius wanted secret codenames because you thought it would be fun.

J: PADFOOT!

S: You rang?

R: Sirius, how did you know we were writing about you?

S: I have a sixth sense. MIND READING. Trelawny says I have THE GIFT.

J: OR there’s the fact that he’s sitting right next to me, reading over my shoulder.

S: Thanks for crushing my dreams of becoming a psychic, James.

R: You’re not a psychic. You never were a psychic, and never will be one.

S: OH, you TOO, eh, Moony? HUH! Maybe YOU’RE the evil secret wizard organization that James was going on about!!

J: Huh! And I trusted you!

R: Why are you egging him on, James?

J: PRONGS!

S: I like eggs.

J: Oh, me, too! Let’s go on a picnic by the lake and have a feast of eggs! All kinds of eggs!

S: And toast. Toast is good.

R: Can we get back onto the whole reason of this note, please?

J: Can you remind me of what that is? I sort of forgot.

R: You were mad that McGonagle gave you detention.

S: Yeah! And we did nothing! The old bag is a raging lunatic!

R: You two DID pretend to put on a fashion show in the Great Hall, using the tables as a catwalk.

S: It was a free show!

R: Yes, but the only thing you wore were tight, pink, see-through boxers.

J: They happen to be very fashionable in London. I thought the teachers here would appreciate my interest in English culture.

R: It’s not “English culture” when everyone can see your what-nots.

L: Why are you talking about James’ and Sirius’ what-nots, Remus?

J: Don’t act like you’ve never seen them, Lilly!

L: Don’t be an idiot.

R: Lilly, how did you get a hold of this note? I clearly passed it to James.

L: It’s kind of hard to not notice a paper ball being thrown at you from across the room.

S: What the heck, James? Why’d you throw it to her?

J: I was trying to get her attention. And it worked! Now, Lilly, the light of my life, the red-headed apple of my eye, will meet me in the prefect’s bathroom tonight at 8:00? No need to bring a swimsuit.

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S: I can’t believe Lilly set our note on fire. Now we’ve got to start a new one!

R: James just asked Lilly to go skinny dipping with him.

J: I didn’t use the actual words, ‘skinny dipping.’

R: You might as well have.

J: Yuck. Look at old Snivellus over there, cuddling up to MY girlfriend.

R: She’s not your girlfriend, James. I’m sure she would rather face a horntail dragon than be your girlfriend.

S: Ouch Moony, that was harsh.

J: Don’t you have ANY feelings, you cold-hearted thing, you?

R: I’m only speaking the truth. Hey, James, you didn’t correct me when I called you James.

J: I’ve decided that it would be pretty cool if the secret wizard organization found out it was me writing these notes. It makes me feel…DANGEROUS.

R: A house elf is more dangerous than you are.

S: Again with the belittling verbal abuse, Moonsy.

J: That’s it, Snivellus is going DOWN! He just tried to hold her hand!

R: I’m pretty sure he was reaching over her hand to grab some potion ingredient, Mr. Observant.

J: HUH! I get ANOTHER codename! Mr. Observant. I like that!

R: Wow. Anything can distract you, James.

J: What did you just distract me from? Oh, right SNIVELLUS!

SS: What do you want, Potter?

J: Stay away from my girlfriend!

R: He’ll never learn, will he?

SS: She’s not your girlfriend. She’d rather have me than you. You know, brains over Braun?

J: That’s why she’s choosing me. I’m WAY smrter than you are!

SS: You just spelled smarter wrong.

J: Don’t make fun of my spelling!

SS: Fine. I’ll make fun of some other defect that you have. Like your hair. Did you just get out of bed? I’m sure Lilly likes well groomed men like me over a untamed beast like YOU.

J: Did you just call yourself a man? If you went to the fashion show, you would know that NOBODY has bigger balls than me!

SS: What does that have to do with being a man?

J: You must live a very sheltered life.

S: I’m TIRED of being out of the conversation! Put me back in!

R: You just put yourself in, moron.

SS: What are you raving on about?

S: Stay out of this, big nose!

SS: My nose is not big!

J: Have you seen the size of that thing? It makes Pinocchio look normal.

SS: Stop making fun of my nose!

S: Aww, did we make ickle Snivellus cry?

SS: I’m not crying. The fumes from the potion are getting to me.

S: Right, and my name is Severus Snape.

SS: If that was your name, you’d be smart and good looking and have a normal sized nose.

J: Hah! You just described me, stupid Slytherin.

SS: Why am I even bothering to respond to your stupid little notes?

J: I don’t know, but you can leave at any time.

SS: Well then stop passing this stupid note to me!

J: Stop responding!

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S: Note number three. People need to stop burning our notes.

R: How about we just stop and actually pay attention to Slughorn today?

S: Why?

R: Because maybe then you won’t fail your N.E.W.T.S.

S: could pass those with one eye closed.

R: …

S: RESPOND, DAMN IT!

R: …

S: Jamsie?

J: …

S: Fine. I’ll end this note MYSELF.