I Love You, Is That So Wrong? Unfortunately, Yes

“I just want it to be a surprise.”

“Is it going to be unraveled anytime soon?”

“It depends…”

“Ryan!” at this Ryan laughed a bit and held Anna’s hand again; smiling at her with that smile he flashed her that time when he told her about his feelings for her.

“Just be patient Anna, don’t worry I won’t forget to tell you, even though you might end up forgetting about the whole mysterious 3rd picture slot thing.” he said.

“You sure you won’t forget?” Anna asked.

“Of course I won’t.” Ryan said as he stared into Anna’s eyes and Anna stared into his, they stared at each other like that for a while, a soft smile then formed on Ryan’s lips. “I love you Anna.” he said, Anna returned the smile.

“I love you too Ryan.” she said, after smiling at each other for a while their faces started nearing each other’s as their eyes slowly closed, nearing into a kiss when they were so untimely interrupted when someone had cleared his throat.

“Excuse me, but your orders have arrived.” it was the waiter with his French accent, he was smiling down at the couple, making Anna blush a bit but Ryan laugh.

“Thanks dude.” he said when the waiter placed their food on the table.

“Bon appetite (that’s French right?)” the waiter said and left their table. Ryan and Anna exchanged glances and laughed a bit at what had just happened before eating their food.

Frankie looked like a tiny little ant standing next to the Eiffel Tower like this, well, everyone will look like a tiny little ant standing next to that thing, it’s huge! He was waiting for Mikee with his gift in hand which was, of course, a box of chocolates (@w@).

“Frankie!” he heard a hyper sounding female said from behind him, turning around he was suddenly caught in a hug by his hyper little girlfriend. He chuckled a bit and hugged back with the hand that wasn’t holding the chocolate.

“Hey Mikee, here.” he said as he pulled away a bit to give her the chocolate, her eyes lit up at seeing the box.

“Wheeeeeeeeeeee!!! Chocolate!!!” she said excitedly, hugging the box (if it was in anime form she’d be in chibi form) and spinning around out of sheer hyperness, Frankie laughed.

“Come on Mikee; let’s get on the… elevator? Mikee! Where are you?!” he takes his eyes off her for a second and she disappears, should’ve brought a leash.

“Frankie! Let’s go now!” Frankie turned around at the sound of that voice, only to see that his girlfriend had just wandered off to where the elevator was located; looking ready to open the box of chocolates he bought her. He smiled and caught up with her there and as they got in the elevator he started poking her.

“You scared me back there!” he said.

“I got a little too hyper, stop poking me!” she said, counter-poking Frankie. Since they were going to the very top of the tower they just kept poking and laughing at each other on the way so they won’t get bored, even if people started staring at them, hmm, so this is what you get when two hyper people date. When they reached their destination they sat on one of those benches or chairs that were near the opening window-like thing. Mikee stuck her head out while kneeling on the bench. “We’re so high!” she said, Frankie laughed at the irony of it, he joined her in kneeling on the bench.

“Hey Mikee, let’s yell random lyrics out the window!” he said.

“Yeah! Let’s do that! You first.” Mikee said, Frankie cleared his throat.

“WELL IF YOU WANTED HONESTY THAT’S ALL YOU HAD TO SAY!” Frankie shouted.

“RIDE INTO THE SUNSET WOULD I LIE TO YOU!” Mikee shouted.

“AND WHAT’S THE WORSE YOU TAKE!”

“SO SEND MY RESIGNATION TO THE BRIDE AND THE GROOM!” (they’re making no sense at all).

“THIS ALONE YOU’RE IN TIME FOR THE SHOW!”

“EVERYBODY BURN THE HOUSE RIGHT DOWN!”

“I LOVE YOU MIKEE!”

“THAT WASN’T A RANDOM LYRIC!”

“I KNOW!”

“I LOVE YOU TOO FRANKIE!” the two turned away from the window and started staring at each other, both having big smiles on their faces. “People were staring at us.” Mikee said in her normal voice.

“I don’t care, but I mean what I shouted, I love you.” Frankie said.

“I love you too.”

Gerard’s POV:

I was lying down on my bed, waiting for the right time when I can talk to Mikey; I looked at my watch to see that it was nearing 5:00; all the pairs should already be out doing something on Valentine’s Day. I get up from my bed to make my way to Frankie, Bob and Ray’s room where I heard Mikey was staying at. I find him napping on one of the beds, his eyes closed and his body slowly moving up and down, in sync with his breathing. I’ve never seen such beauty in his sleeping form, it’ll be almost illegal to wake him from his innocent slumber.

“Mikey.” I said softly as I sit down on the bed he was sleeping on, Mikey stirred at the extra weight on the bed and at the sound of my voice. His eyes slowly open and seemed shocked to see me.

“Gerard?” he said, sitting up as I smiled softly at him.

“We need to talk.” I said.

Mikey’s POV:

I suddenly find Gerard sitting on my bed, saying that we needed to talk. Well this it’s not like it’s the first time I catch Gerard sitting on a bed I’m on; I sit up and try not to stare into his eyes.

“What?” I asked, Gerard sighs before he starts to talk.

“It’s about us, Mikey, you’ve been avoiding me lately.” he said.

“After what happened back at the bus, I couldn’t help but try to avoid you, what were you talking about with Anna back at breakfast? Me?” I ask, Gerard isn’t looking at me straight in the eye right now.

“Yes, she’s the only person I could ask advice about this too, I can’t just go to Nadine or Bob.” he said.

“What is that supposed to mean? You don’t trust Bob?” I said, a feeling in my gut telling me that I’m going to crack soon.

“Mikey you know I trust everyone of the guys in the band, we’re closer than best friends, we're all like brothers.”

“Then why do we keep hiding this from them?!” I start shouting as I get off my bed and glare at Gerard, instinctively he gets up too.

“Mikey…” he said, reaching his hand out to caress my cheek but I did the first thing that came into my mind, I gave him a hard slap on the cheek. It hurt me to do so but it was the only way to get him to grasp the fact that we’re going to have a fight, a verbal one, at least that’s how far I want to go. He gives me a shocked and hurt expression after I slapped him, my eyes can’t help but to start watering.

“Gerard, if we’re that close to Frankie, Bob and Ray then why are we always trying to hide our relationship from them?! They deserve to know! Do you know how much keeping it from them has affected Bob when Nadine told him?!” I said, my voice started to crack as I just keep shouting at my brother, who was just standing there, his tears starting to roll down his pale cheeks as did mine. It hurt me seeing him like that, but this had to be done.

“They got into a fight Gerard, we ruined their friendship, now Bob thinks he probably has no chance with Nadine and Nadine thinks her life is screwed up! We screwed up her life Gerard! She didn’t screw her own life! WE DID! YOU SAID WE WOULDN’T GET CAUGHT! YOU SAID THAT WE’LL TELL THEM ABOUT US SOMEDAY BUT THAT SOMEDAY NEVER CAME! NOT EVERYTHING YOU SAY IS RIGHT GERARD!” at this point Gerard looked like he was going to start shouting too, which he did.

“So you’re saying it’s my fault?! Go ahead! Put all the blame on me! I LOVE YOU MIKEY! IS THAT SO WRONG?!”

“Unfortunately Gerard, yes.” I said, I see Gerard grit his teeth before storming out of the room with his tearstained face. My tears continue falling as I sit on one of the beds, feeling the guilt and hurt set in on me.

Gerard’s POV:

I walk out of the room, I don’t care if people were staring at me, probably wondering why a grown man such as myself is crying like this. They don’t know anything. They don’t know what happened. They don’t know what it’s like to share a love that is sick and wrong. Soon I’m on the streets of France, the street lamps were already on coz it was already dark.

I start walking to the nearest bar, thinking of drinking my misery away. It might just be my imagination but I suddenly feel that someone was following me. I turn to look behind me but I didn’t see anyone, maybe the fight with me and Mikey was just getting to my head. I finally reach the bar but I still feel that someone’s been following me.

I sit on one of the stools and order heavy liquor. There weren’t a lot of people in the bar, just some random dudes getting drunk. There was this dude who sat next to me shortly after I had entered the bar and I noticed that he kept looking at me for some reason. I ignored him at first as I just kept ordering drink after drink.

After a while the alcohol started setting in to my system, my vision started getting bleary and my mind was clouded. I almost forgot about the fact that Mikey and I fought, I even almost forgot about Mikey. I just got drunker and drunker by the minute, not stopping with the drink orders.

“Don’t you think you’ve had enough sir?” the bartended warned me in a concerned tone of voice, but I didn’t care about having too much to drink anymore, I was too drunk.

“Just shut up and give me more…” I said, shoving my glass to him so he could fill it with more liquor. I kept drinking until the point that my body was too intoxicated to even hold the glass properly, I thought I was going to black out. The bartender looked like he was about to help me until the dude next to me placed my arm around his shoulders.

“I have him.” he said, I was too drunk to react as he lifted me from my seat. We exited the bar but he goes the opposite direction of where the hotel was. Instead he leads me to this dark, abandoned alley. My body was suddenly pushed up against a wall, his hands wandering to parts only Mikey should touch as I feel him breathing down my neck. “I finally have you, Gerard Way.” he said, nibbling on my ear.

I don’t like where this is going, after I feel his hands slither down my pants I know all too well what he’s going to do. I can’t fight back, being intoxicated prevented me to do so.

“Please… don—“I managed to say but my sentence was cut off by a pair of rough lips pressing against mine, remembering Mikey’s soft and smooth lips that were so much opposite from his. He slips his tongue inside, which was very unwelcome. My body starts shaking in fear and I couldn’t help but start shedding tears when he starts unzipping himself and me.

I shouldn’t have drank that much.

Mikey’s POV:

The rest had come back sometime after Gerard had walked out of the room, my eyes were still red as I met everyone in the lobby. I couldn’t find Gerard in the middle of the crowd of our friends, which starts to worry me coz it was already late.

“Mikey, dude you all right? You look like you’ve just cried.” Frankie said, being the first one to notice.

“Where’s Gerard?” was the first thing I said.

“We haven’t seen him Mikey, I thought he was here all day.” Frankie answered, not very helpful are you now Frankie?

“Why? Did something happen?” Anna asked, everybody else was sitting down on the lobby, while I was pacing around.

“Panic!, Christa, Riley, Iris, you guys can go ahead to your rooms, I need to talk about this matter to the band and the girls.” I asked nicely. They agreed and went up to their rooms, but I just continued pacing.

“Mikey, just tell us what’s going on now.” Ray said.

“Gerard and I got into a fight, and he ran off somewhere.” I started.

“Where do you think he ran off to?” Bob asked.

“How am I supposed to know?! He didn’t tell me where he was going! He could’ve gone anywhere!” I said.

“Why did you guys fight anyway?” Abi asked, thee was a short silence and I stopped my pacing to gather up courage to tell them. Anna, Nadine and Bob already knew, I guess the others should already know.

“Ray, Frankie, Abi, Mikee, there’s something that you guys should know that Gerard and I have been hiding from you for some time now…” I said.

“You mean Anna, Nadine and Bob knows?” Frankie asked.

“Pay attention Frankie.” Mikee said, I take a deep sigh and turn to face them.

“Gerard and I are gay, and we’ve been together ever since the sleepover.” there, I said it. They didn’t say anything at first, not sure of what to say or do.

“You’re… you’re not joking are you?” Ray said, I looked directly into his eyes, my bloodshot ones piercing into his contacted ones.

“He isn’t joking…” Nadine said in a soft voice.

“Ever since the sleepover? Mikey why didn’t you just tell us?” Frankie asked.

“That was the reason why Gerard and I fought, now thanks to me he ran off somewhere where anything could happen to him, he could be getting drunk, something bad can happen to him and it’ll be my fault.” I said, my throat starting to croak again as fresh tears start running down my cheeks.

“Mikey…” Abi said, the girls got up from where they were sitting and helped me in sitting down on the couch as everybody starts trying to comfort me, but nothing they said really made me feel better.

“Looks like this it’s not the right time to go all yaoi fangirl now is it?” Mikee said.

“No Mikee, it is not the right time.” Ray said rolling his eyes.

“Mikey, don’t worry, Gerard will turn up, he’s probably just somewhere trying to cool down.” Bob said.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, it’s not entirely your fault.” Anna said.

“Things will turn out okay dude.” Frankie said.

“Don’t cry anymore Mikey.” Abi said.

“Yeah, I’m sure you two can patch things up with each other soon.” Nadine said, I faked a smile at them, maybe they should go ahead to their rooms, I’ll wait for Gerard down here.

“Thanks guys… look, I’ll wait for Gee here in the lobby, you guys can go to your rooms now, please.” I said nicely, they understood though and went ahead to their rooms as I sit here in the lobby, staring at the door, hoping Gee will turn up soon.

I think I fell asleep in the lobby, coz I woke up to a thud somewhere near the entrance and all the lights in the lobby have been dimmed. I see a slumped figure at the door, and I heard soft whimpering and sobbing that seemed familiar to me.