The End.

Chapter Twenty-Four: Brothers on a Hotel Bed

xXMikey’s POVXx

I don’t remember what happened after I blacked out. I didn’t hear a thing, and I was surrounded by darkness. Was I finally waking up from this horrible nightmare? I really do hope so.

I opened my eyes to the sound of pitter patting rain. I rose my head from the soft bed I resided on. How’d I get here? I was out cold for a good two hours. So, how’d I end up here? Where is ‘here’ anyway?

I looked at my surroundings. I was laying on a king sized bed in the middle of the dark room. I really couldn’t make out any features of the room, like the color of the wallpaper or the furniture positions. All I knew was that the only light that came into the room was from the dim bathroom light and the crack under the door. Where am I?

“Good, you’re awake,” I heard a voice say. A familiar voice, that I didn’t want to here. I looked around. No one was there. Who’s in the room with me?

“Who the hell are you?!” I spat at nothing. “Where are you?!”

I heard a small chuckle erupt from the stranger’s throat. Suddenly, a lamp clicked on, giving the room a little light. The sudden brightness stung my eyes. I looked over to where the light was coming from. Fuck. It was him. My brother Gerard, sitting in a big green chair, looking straight at me. Fuck.

“What do you want Gerard?!” I threw at him. He didn’t flinch at my raised voice.

“To talk,” he replied. He stood up and walked over to the window. He looked out into the gray sky, where the rain was pouring down. Hard.

“Where are we?” I asked, a little more calm this time, but still tense.

“A hotel on the outskirts of Belleville,” he told me, not moving from the sight outside the window. Silence fell over us. The light bulb in the lamp went out. Neither of us moved for a moment. Gerard spoke first.

“Why did you run away Mikey?” he asked. I turned to him.

“Because I needed to wake up,” I replied truthfully. Wait. I told him that? Why?

“Mikey,” he breathed. He paused. “You lived on the street. You know you could have died out there right? We were worried.” Again, his eyes never moved from the rain.

“No you weren’t,” I grumbled, “Don’t fucking lie.”

“Mikey,” he cooed.

“What? I know what you think Gerard! That I’m a fucking drug addict. I’m not! I’m perfectly fine!” I raised my voice at him. He continued to stare into the sky. I glared at him. Nothing. “I’ll be right back.”

Gerard nodded as I flipped the covers off of me and ran into the bathroom. The large white door slammed hard behind me, making some of the picture frames inside the perfect white room move off center. But do you think I cared? Why would I? It’s not my room...

I kicked the wall angrily several times. Why’d Gerard, of all people, have to find me?! It’s not fucking fair. It’s like God, if he’s real, is against me taking care of myself. I can! I’m completely capable of being on my own and independent. Doesn't anyone realize that?

After exhausting myself from kicking the wall and I was drained of all energy, I slid down the wall and onto the perfect tiled floor. I banged my head against the wall a couple of times impatiently and tiredly, until there was a slight dent in the perfect wall. Ugh. I can’t think. I need pills. I need a drink.

I dragged myself off of the floor and walked over to the sink. I turned on the cold water and splashed it into my face, and cupped my hands to drink the little liquid that came out. After slashing myself on more time. I rose my head to look at a something that caught my eye. The mirror.

I rose my head fully to look at what was fully there in the gleaming portrait. It was a man. Not a boy, but a man, standing full length in the mirror. He was tall and lanky. He had grimy light brown hair that looked dirty and unwashed. He had heavy bags under his eyes and had ghostly pale skin with a soft purple tint. There were heavy lines on his face and looked like he was old enough to be Gerard. But he looked like shit. Wait. Was that...me?

Oh my god. Maybe that’s how the girl in the diner realized I had was going through something. Too young. Too young to look like this. To be high off of pills. I actually see what’s going on. I have a problem, and that needs to change.

Maybe I was wrong this whole time. Maybe Gerard does care, and maybe the rest of the guys do to. They actually wanna help me? Would they still want to after I treated them like shit? Probably not. I wouldn’t be surprised if they hated me by now. I really should apologize. Not only to the guys, but to Gerard.

I turned off the light to the bathroom and shut the door. I stared at the doorknob as I let go of it. I turned to the bed in the middle of the room. Gerard was sitting, legs crossed, on the neatly made sheets. The candle he had lit loomed his face with a slightly golden tint, making him look like the savior he was. I’m so glad he’s here for me. Otherwise, I’d be dead on the street right now.

I slid under the sheets of the bed quietly. I didn’t speak a word to Gerard. I was too nervous after all that happened this week. A good nights sleep would be good. I felt movement in the bed as Gerard got under the covers too, facing my back.

As I was almost fully asleep, I heard Gerard whisper, “I love you Mikey. Please be good.” He then turned the other way and fell asleep. I wanted to cry right there. How could he be so forgiving?

I turned on the mattress and stared at the ceiling. Tomorrow, would Frankie, Ray, and Bob all forgive me? I really hope so. I want to start anew. But a thought came to me.

What if this time around, I truly was wrong? What if Gerard really didn’t forgive me, and wanted to get me out of his life? What if the guys kicked me out of the band because of all my stupid mistakes this passed week. An worst of all, what if Alicia never comes back? What if I’m left to die, like in the streets, cold and alone? Maybe that’s my fate...

I really wasn’t thinking about it when I got up. I ran to the door and rattled the doorknob. Locked. I looked over at Gerard’s wallet, which was sitting on the table where the lamp was. I lifted it up and opened it, seeing the old baby picture of us he kept. The key was behind it. I took the picture out and with the key and stared at it for a while. After I unlocked the door, I did what I had to do to erase myself from history.

I ripped the picture in half and out the door I ran...