The End.

Chapter Six: Admit It, I’m a Fucking Hypocrite!

xXGerard’s POVXx

I sat on the edge of the small tub in the bus bathroom. I’ve been sitting there for a while, just staring at the empty bottle in my hand. I really can’t believe this. I just can’t believe it. I refuse to admit what I think though. It could happen, and it scares me so much. Irony sucks like that.

I heard a knock on the half closed door and shoved the bottle in my pocket. “Come in,” I said to the person. The door opened. It was Frankie. I feel bad that I’m hiding this from him, but I can’t even admit it to myself yet. I’m too scared, and too much of a hypocrite.

“You okay?” Frankie asked me. i nodded and smiled at him. Silence

“Did you talk to him?” I asked him, breaking the awkward silence.

“I would have brought him with me if I did,” he replied, Our conversation was...okay.”

“What happened?”

“He yelled a lot. I think he’s just in denial right now. We’ll see what happens I guess.”

“Yea, you’re right. Giving him time and room to breathe may just be the best we can do right now.”

“I know. Suffocating him with worry is the worst we can do.”

I nodded. I turned to face Frankie. His brown eyes looked into mine. He raised a brow at me. Oh god. Can he see that I’m upset?

“You okay?” he asked finally. I turned away and stared at the floor. I started shaking. I felt like I was gonna cry. But I couldn’t. I’d have to be brave. I felt a hand on my back. “What’s going on Gee?”

“It’s Mikey,” I started, trying to hold back my tears. I can’t cry. I can’t cry.

“What is it?” he asked me softly. I kept shaking. Suddenly, I felt a stream of water fall don my cheek. I can’t let it out. I have to hold it in right now. But obviously, I couldn’t. I finally broke down and cried my eyes out. “Gee, what is it?”

“He’s,” I sobbed loudly, “He’s taking sleeping pills Frank. Really strong ones.” I sobbed more. Frank sat there, his mouth agape, rubbing my back consolingly.

“It’s okay,” he cooed, “It’s okay.” He hugged me gently. I felt something on the back of my neck. A wet drop trickled down. Frank was crying too.

“It just,” I choked back the last of my tears, “hurts so much. I’ve been through this shit. I’ve been in the shit. I never wanted to see my little brother like this. Ever. Frank, when I saw him, out cold, on the floor this morning, do you know just how much I freaked out? I was just so...scared.”

“I know,” Frank replied, “But it’ll get better. Mikey needs our help. It’ll get better. We’re all scared. I know that. But I can promise you, he’ll get better.”

“I know, but still,” I stared at him and a watery chuckle escaped my throat, “I must sound like such a hypocrite right now, don’t I?”

“No Gee,” he told me. He turned and smiled, “You sound like an older brother that’s worried about his younger brother.”

I smiled. I guess he was right. I mean, when I did all that shit, Mikey was the one that had to be mature about it. Now, I guess I get the chance to be there for him. But I wish it couldn’t have been like this. I really wish that.

“I should let the guys know what’s going on,” he said, “It’ll be okay. We’ll get through this.” With that, he walked out the door.

“Yea, but will Mikey get through this?” I asked no one. I rubbed my forehead and looked at the floor.

“Why are you making this mistake Mikey?”