Uncle Good Riddance

I caught a cab easily as I walked down the street, it was as if I had lived here for years.

"A good cheap bar, my man." I smiled sweetly at the driver as he nodded and we set off down the street for about 10minutes before he turned up a street and dropped off outside a bar called 'Marcy's'.

"This one should suit your needs, gorgeous." He winked at me as I handed over five dollars.

"Thankyou." I winked back, flirting openly.

"Hey you need a ride back later?"

"Aww that would be lovely! How about 4?" I asked him sweetly.

"Ok sure thing, right here yeah?" He smiled as I got out and nodded at him, entering the bar easily and going straight to the bar.

"What can I get you?" The bartender asked in a strong brooklyn accent.

"A drink that is going to get me smashed." I winked at him. Flirting gets you everywhere I have realised and I use it at every possible occurance.

"Okay, how 'bout I set you up with around 10 shots and see how you feel?" He smirked setting 10 shot glasses down on the bar in front of the me and filling every one. I paid him and smiled.

"Here we go, hey?" He stood in front of my watching, the bar wasn't too busy. I downed the first five, and felt them hit me instantly and I went a bit dizzy.

"Whoa, what are these shots?" I grinned at him.

"Something a little special for the English." He laughed going off to serve someone else as I finished them off, knowing I was past tipsy after them. I sat at the bar, watching people come in and enjoy themselves. I wasn't used to drinking alone but hey, emergencies call for these type of situations.

"So you want anymore or did that do it for you?"

"Aw baby, you know I wanna get more drunk." I giggled. I knew I was getting drunk, I never giggle sober. He smirked and filled up the shot glasses again.
"Go on then, down the hatch and all that jazz." He smirked, he was enjoying getting me drunk. I went to hand him my money. "No, these are on me." I smiled and downed them alot easier than the last batch. I tried to stand up and nearly fell over.

"They were some good shots!" I giggled as a man came up to me and put his hand on my waist.

"Well hello there, sexy." He said. "Fancy a dance?"

"Why not?" I smiled as he led me, drunk, to the dance floor and we started grinding and bumping against each other.

I love acting like a weirdo when I'm drunk.

I stumbled over to bar around an hour later and looked up at the clock.
'3:05AM' it read and I smiled, and went to see my new favourite bar tender.

"You look like your having fun."

"Oh i am, but right now, more drinks are needed my good man!" I laughed, really enjoying myself. He smiled and poured out 10 more shots, I groaned whilst laughing. "I can't handle 10 more I think."

"Try." He smiled as I handed him some more money, but he gave me half of it back. "Buy one get one free." He winked.

I downed them slowly and as each one hit, I got more drunk and more drunk to the point I was nearly passing out there and then on the bar.

"Wow you are so drunk right now." The bar keep laughed watching me sway helplessly on my chair.

"Few more for the road!" I giggled as he poured five more out.

"If your sick, I swear, you are in so much trouble." He laughed as I started to down them. I knew this was the state I loved to get in, where I actually can not remember my name or anything. It's refreshing and frightingly fun not knowing anything about yourself and not being able to even walk.

"I have to go pee." I said desperately, getting up from the bar stool and falling over myself trying to get to the bathroom.

"Hey, watch it." A tall lass said turning round and grabbing hold of me.

"Hey, Mel, take her to the bathroom please? I can't leave the bar." The bartender begged her and she held my arm.

"Come on, hun, why did you drink so much, eh?" She said nicely. She walked with me to the bathroom and left me to do my business.

"You look like my friend." I giggled stumbling out of the cubicle hoping I looked ok.

"Hey at least you can dress yourself." She smiled at me as I threw my hands messily under the tap she turned on.

"Your not from around here are you?" She asked leaning on the wall but I was seeing four of her by this point.

"Nooo" I slurred leaving the bathroom and propping myself back up at the bar.

"Mel...?" The bartender nodded to me, and Mel took me outside.

"Look, hun, get a cab home now. There's going to be trouble here later, you don't want to be here for it." She opened a cab door and I fell in.

"I don't know where I live." I hiccuped, suddenly feeling very emotional and hurt. Urgh, I hate getting drunk for this reason.

"My mam put the address in my purse." I said pulling my purse out of my bag.

"Ok, look I've found it." Mel picked up a piece of white paper and handed it to the cab driver. "Good luck" She murmured to the cab driver as she shut the door on me. My eyes began to close and soon I was nodding off in the back seat of this cab. Not a good idea, the motion of the cab moving started to make me feel sick.

"Oi, wake up, we're here." The cab driver said opening the door for me outside a house that I recognised. I saw all the lights were still on downstairs but the gates were locked, how was I going to get in? I tried to get out of the taxi but couldn't without falling flat on my face, I started to laugh. Good god why do I bother getting myself into these states?

"Oh my god." The cab driver groaned as he pressed the button on the intercom at the gates.

"Yes?" A voice crackled over the speaker.

"Present for you, young girl, do you know her?" He said trying to pick me up.

"Oh thank god!" The voice crackled before a beep sounding the gate opening.
The driver walked me in through the gate and left me the other side as he went back to his cab before the gates shut again.

"Hey!" I shouted after him giggling as the front door flew open, "I'm ho-omeeeeeee!" I sang as I watched four figures running down the steps at me, before falling flat on my face on the grass and passing out through utter drunkeness.

Not the most pleasurable situation, ever, but hey, we've survived worst.