Shame Shame on Me

It was about ten thirty at night and I was messing around on the laptop computer that Sonny had let me borrow while they did the show. Merely out of boredom I was looking around on fanfic websites. I actually remember writing this stuff when I was a little younger in what seemed like hundreds of notebooks I hid under my mattress. Not all of it was dirty, don't get me wrong. But every writer has that day... sometimes more that once.

The things I was reading were outstandingly well written! It just took my breath away with how these kids described these characters and their surroundings. I'm surprised that some of them haven't been published. I was scanning over the titles, and one caught my eye. It was a slash fiction story about two guys. It peaked my interest by the description and looked into it.

I began reading, and it started out slow, which is good. But by the fourth chapter, I started getting hot under the collar. Literally. I took off my hoodie, staring at the screen with wide eyes just in total awe at what all was going on. I don't know if 'awe' is the right word though... jeeze!

So... passionate and detailed. I could feel my heart start to beat faster and my stomach erupted in butterflies just by reading the stuff! I couldn't stop, but once the sound of hurried footsteps came to my knowledge, I closed the window quickly and shut down the laptop, hoping that no one would read what I just did.

"Hey sweetie! How're you doing?"

"Great!" I kissed him, taking a deep breathe, "Whoo! Take a shower before you kiss me again, you stink."

"Aw, but you know you like it."

"You're right, but you left out 'to a certain extent.' Now, please wash your stinky ass and then I'll kiss you," I smiled up at him, he just rolled his eyes and walked away. Matt and Travis were playing rock-paper-scissors to see who went first, Sonny shouted his claim on winner and Derek shrugged and smiled at me. I nodded and went back to calming myself down.

'Damn, I haven't read anything that horribly addicting since... well... I was thirteen! I don't think that I should read anymore of that... there's strange shit happenin' down there!' I thought as I looked down into my lap. It was true! It felt like I was frickin' wound up tighter than a crossbow!

I went and laid down in the bunk Sonny's slept alone in lately, and tried to think of something not-so-sexy. Easier said than done. It was about forty-five minutes before I was attacked by Sonny.

"Hey sexy! I'm clean, will you kiss me now?" I laughed at Sonny, who poked his head through the drawn curtain. He had his lips puckered like a little kid wanting a kiss from his mother. I kissed him and he squealed as he climbed in, trying to get on top of me. He was small, so he managed. He had his hands on my stomach, and one leg on either side of my hips. He smiled at me the pressed on my stomach more, then looked at me weird.

"You're tense!"

"And you know this how?"

"Your muscles down here are tight," he the smiled and grinned at me. I cocked an eyebrow and looked at him funny.

"You've got a party in your pants, don't you!" I burst out laughing as he started to giggle at his silly question. I heard all the guys said 'What?!' loudly and Elric barked. I laughed harder when he started to tickle me, I tried to scoot away, but I just met the wall of the bus.

"Stop! Stop! It's starting to hurt! Stop, stop, stop!" I pleaded. He lent down and pecked me on the lips. I smiled up at him and nodded, "Yes, I have a party in my pants, are you happy now?"

"Yesh... yesh I am. Wait! Am I invited?" I wanted to laugh, but held it back.

"Is that being suggestive? Mr. Moore, I don't think our friends would appreciate that very much...."

"If you start fucking I'm jumping out the bus!" screamed Matt.

"Hey! No sex on the bus! Do that somewhere else!" I heard Steve yell from the driver's seat. He probably just got back. I can imagine how freaked out he is, just coming onto the bus and hearing sex-talk. I giggled and looked at Sonny, who moved to lay beside me and was looking at me with a soft look on his face. I knew that look. But he had a bit of longing in his eyes this time... but why?

"I love you... I'm so glad I proposed," he whispered to me, I felt my previous butterflies go away, and a warm feeling spread through me.

"So am I. I love you too," I whispered back, trying not to cry. Just the way he looked at me and the way he said it made me want to cry. I let slip a single tear and it ran down my cheek as I sat up a little. He smiled and swept it away with this thumb. He looked at it on his finger, and to my surprise, he licked it off.

"Your tears taste sweet, like honey. You know, you never did really kiss me, like you said you would...." I smiled at him, moving closer and pressing my lips softly to his. Sonny rested a hand on my neck, slowly inching into my hair. He brought me closer to deepen the kiss, while letting himself in. I separated his legs, pushing one of mine between them. I put my arms around his neck and he pushed closer to me. I felt his other hand snake behind me and start to crawl up my shirt, he toyed with my bra and got one clip undone. I pulled away from the kiss to breathe, just hardly hovering next to his lips. He opened his eyes, and the longing I had seen before became lust. I'm sure that I had the same thing going on in my eyes, but he just looked like he was painfully wistful for... me.

I closed my eyes again and bit my lip. I looked up at him, trying to look the slightest bit cute. His lustful look increased immensely and he breathed something that I couldn't catch as I smiled a little as I still nibbled on my lower lip. I kissed his top lip, brushing my fingers against the back of his ear, getting my fingers twisted in his wild black hair. I could feel his heart race, and smiled as I bit one of his lip rings, tugging slightly. He let loose a small moan, quietly so only us two could hear it. I pushed my body against his ever so lightly and he gradually pushed me against the wall of the bunk. I finally stopped teasing him, kissing him full-on the lips and he released a held breath slowly. I watched his eyes roll under his lids, and closed my eyes. Sonny's arm reached behind me again and undid one more clip on my bra. He pulled away from the kiss and looked at me, as if to ask a question. I nodded and whispered,

"They'll never know...."

He undid my bra all the way, but my shirt got in his way. He slipped it off over my head and looked at my chest. I stared at him as he ran his fingers over my collar bone and shivered as he slowly brought my bra strap off my shoulder. I bit my lip to stifle a tiny moan, and he looked me in the eyes. I heard him sigh and look away. I put my finger under his chin, lifting his gaze to my eye-level.

"What's wrong, I thought you wanted this?"

"I can't... the guys, and I just --" I put a finger to his lips and shushed him.

"I understand, it's okay. Come on, lets get a little sleep before we get to the airport. Okay?"

"Are you sure you're okay with it? I'm sorry for getting that far... I mean... I'm just sorry baby," he apologized, looking sad. I smiled at him and kissed his lips lightly while re-applying the clips on my bra.

"It's fine. I'm sorry for being such a tease... I shouldn't have got you that far. I'm the one to be apologizing." He smiled at me, and passed me my shirt back. But in an effort to make him happier, I slipped out of my pants. He laughed slightly and I cuddled up next to him, sliding my hand into his and intertwining our fingers. I kissed him one last time and said our goodnights and I love yous before drifting easily to sleep, well at least for me, for the first time in a week.