Someday I will Understand

Driving around Jersey Gerard just wanted to hold Kate’s hand to feel the closeness they once had, Kate on the other hand was apprehensive all she had on her mind was how Gerard had betrayed her and her mind was starting to wonder on what Frank was doing.

Shaking her head she looked over at Gerard who was concentrating on the road, Since they had left Starbucks neither had said a word to one another, Gerard was confused on how Kate felt he wanted her to return his feelings and there were so many words he had to say but he first needed to hear what she had to say, so then he would know whether her heart was still in this relationship or if it was well and truly over.

“Kate...What are we going to do about us?” Gerard asked
Kate slowly looked over trying to have no emotion on her face “I don’t know” she whispered
“Katie how can you not know...Do you love me..Do you wanna fight for what we had or are you just willing to let go” Gerard asked in a serious tone
“I feel like I want to..I miss your touch but then I think well you touched her and I hate you for it that you were with someone else especially her - she makes me sick and then I want you just to stay away from me” Kate responded

Gerard was starting to get a little angry all he wanted was a simple yes or no “ Well Katie you need to make a decision either work this out or walk away...Which one is it?” Gerard replied through gritted teeth

Kate could feel that she was making Gerard angry which was making her angry as she started to say words she continued to think at how could he be angry at her, what had she done maybe been a little looney but no matter what he had betrayed her and slept with someone else
“I’m gonna walk away” Kate whispered as a tear fell down her face

Gerard stopped the car dead in it’s tracks “Are you serious” his voice boomed with in the car
“Yeh I think so...I don’t want to fight” Kate said slumping in the car chair
“Kate this is a load of BS, I thought you were better then this”
“Gerard what do you want from me, you fucking asked me a question and I fucking answered it” Kate yelled
“I thought you would fight for this, after everything we have gone through and you just wanna walk away I love you Kate cant you see that...I’m sorry for what I done...have you thought about what you put me through, Wondering everyday if you were gonna be ok, I stood by you cause I knew you were the one and now you wanna walk away”
“Don’t you get it, that’s just it all the crap I put you through don’t you know how sorry I am and how ashamed I feel, what I put you through no one should have had to go through but you did and that’s not fair and what happens if I done it again I’d be hurting you more and I promised myself I’d never hurt you and I did” Kate said sobbing

By now there was a car behind them who was tooting there horn, Gerard waved for them to go forward and on the way the driver yelled “Don’t you fucking know where to park?”
“Get Fucked” Gerard yelled back

Looking over at Kate he could see her hands over her face trying to control the tears that were falling from her face, he wanted and needed to hold her, pulling over to the side of the road he parked the car where he got out and walked over to the passenger side, opening the door he placed his arms around Kate where she rested her head on his chest.
“Katie I love you with all my heart...more then you will ever know”
Kate looked up at him with her tear stained eyes and smudged makeup “I’m sorry...I feel so good about myself and I hate the person I was and how I hurt everyone around me...I want to be normal and I think with you I cant do that”
“Katie please don’t say that”
“What do you want me to say?”
“That you love me and you wanna fight for us..you’re my soul mate Kate and I promised you I’d make you my wife and I still want that honour”

Kate looked up at Gerard who was kneeling on the foot path, moving her head closer it was like her heart was taking over sick of her brain trying to make decisions, moving her lips closer so they almost touched Kate kissed Gerard softly on the lips and whispered “Right now I want you to hold me”
Gerard done what he asked where he held her in his arms and returned the kiss Kate had started.
After holding her for some time Gerard let go where he whispered “I love you”
“I love you too..always” Kate replied with a smile

Gerard stood up from where he had been kneeling and picked a flower from the tree besides him, once again he knelt where Kate was now looking at him with a weird face trying to determine what he was doing.
With his hand he grabbed Kate’s and placed the flower on her palm, Kate continued to stare “ Katie I love you more then life it’s self, everyday your not with me I hate it, I need and want you in my life for ever so will you please do me the honour of being my wife?”

Kate looked at him dumbfounded, slowly a smile spread across her face and finally she spoke “Yes baby yes I’ll marry you” she replied as she threw her arms over Gerard who fell backwards with Kate on him.
Both couldn’t help but burst in to a fit of laughing as Gerard was now on the ground.

Getting up Gerard picked Kate up in his arms and swung her around,”you are gonna make me the happiest person alive...We just have to put our past behind and deal with the future”

Kate kissed Gerard on the lips, in the back of her mind it started to wonder on how Frank was going to take it, she liked him a lot and she knew he could in fact be in love with her.

Only time would tell who would really have their heartbroken.