Now I See the Truth in Your Eyes

I stared at them from outside the restaurant, my back leaned against the wall, hands shoved in my pockets.
I always knew I'd be the one standing alone in the cold.

I watched them holding hands, sharing kisses, her hand creeping up his thight.Him smiling like an idiot.
So cliché.

This all had happened before. The difference was, I had been the one sitting on that chair then.
Now you must be thinking:
"Hasn't he been with Valary for at least twelve years?"
Well yes, I was his mistress.

And now you will ask:
"Why wasn't she enough?"
Honestly?
I have no idea, I never asked. I couldn't care less.
As long as he was with me, nothing else mattered.

I gave him all I had, aware there would never be much he could give me.
She knew there was something going on, but she always forgave him.

I wished so many times she didn't, maybe then he would come to me.
And just maybe then I would even be more than his dirty little secret.

Never happened...
He would always run back to her begging for forgiveness like a lost puppy.
I pretended I was okay with it.

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"Baby I don't wanna keep hurting you."
My heart clenched at that.
"Matt it's okay, I'm okay. Please I can take everything. Watching you with her, sleeping alone. Everything. Just please don't finish that sentence."
"But baby-"
"Matthew please just...don't. Don't do this to me please."
I knew I wouldn't be able to hold back tears for much longer.
"I just don't want to hurt you more baby," He pulled me closer, holding me against his heart.
"You don't. I'm okay. Just please don't...leave me."
My voice broke down a bit, while a tear managed to slid down my cheek.
He caringly wipped it away with his thumb.
"I won't love, I promise."
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I knew now he never meant it, he always knew he would leave me one day. If at least I knew it then...
If I knew it then? Well, I wouldn't have done a thing.
Even knowing it was wrong, that I was only hurting myself I didn't care.
At the end of the day I wouldn't regret a thing, because I knew that for a couple of hours I had him.

I don't know for how many time I stood there staring. Hours it seemed.
I focused my eyes back on their table just to see them getting up. He helped her up like the gentleman he is.

That's when it happened.

His gorgeous eyes stared into mine. Confusion, surprise, so many feelings.
I still could make his heart stop.
And that's when I realized there was something she would never have from him.

His all heart.

Cause well, I had stolen it already.

And don't pretend you'll ever forget about me.