They say love is blind, or is it just me?

Part Twenty six

~FF two months~
It’s amazing how busy it’s been for the guys, with the new season and all. I’m really happy for them, but a little sad that I only get to spend time with bam during the night. He has a lot of energy, but even continues days of filming tire him. So, not much exiting things have happened over the last two months. We did spend time with each other though. I am still, if not even more thankful for all the things he does for me, and I enjoy hearing about all his adventures.

I took demon’s leash and stepped outside. Bam did have him trained after all, he knew his way around the yard pretty well. I was just going to walk him for a little bit. I heard the guys splashing around in the pool, they were building some humongous slide. I loved how they could all fully commit to something like that. Demon barked and we started walking. The weather was nice. Demon had grown quite a lot over the past two months, he already came a little over my knee, but he still was the cuddler he was as a little puppy. He often jumped on me and started licking me. Bam would make jokes about how the dog is my favourite and why I let him lick me. He knew I hated those jokes, they would make me blush furiously, where after he would kiss me and grab my sides. The little things he did would make me fall in love with him all over again. "Demon, Come boy! " I said walking further onto the grass that surrounded Bam’s Castle. I heard the cars passing by in the distance and let my thoughts flow freely. Would anything ever happen to me and Bam? What if it just didn’t work anymore? I mean.. Every couple has difficulties.. What if we couldn’t overcome ours? What would happen to me? I shook my head. I can’t think like this, I promised Bam I’d be a little more positive on my outlook of life, he didn’t like it when I put myself down. Demon clawed at my legs and I crouched down. "What’s up buuuuudy? " I said patting his head. I felt a branch between his jaws. I smiled and pulled it out. I couldn’t very well throw it away, because I’d be pulled behind him, he really was strong. So I threw it in the air and felt him jump to get it, he landed right on top of me. I laughed and hugged him. "Love you buddy.. " I mumbled into his fur. We got up and walked on. I noticed He was leading me into the forest. "Demon, house! " He knew certain commando’s, and he did know his way back to the house flawlessly. BANG! A loud crash was heard after a screeching of tires. Demon jumped and started running, after a few metres the leash was pulled out of my hands and I fell between the wet leaves. Panic immediately overtook my body. I held my hands out in front of me and tried to find some trees. I immediately fell down again because of a log that was laying on the ground. "Please no, please no" I mumbled getting up again. I tried to walk around, but then realised I’d probably get in more trouble. I should stay put. What happened anyway? Was that a car crash? I shivered. The weather suddenly wasn’t that nice anymore. I sat down, pulled my knees up to my chest and hugged my arms around them. I sat there, silently rocking myself. What time was it anyway? Why didn’t I bring my phone? I realised I was asking questions I would not get the answer to any time soon. I sighed and closed my eyes. Please.. please.. let someone come soon.. They would look, right? If they saw Demon by himself?

~Bam’s POV~
"Fuck, moron! How many time do I have to tell you! The long boards, go at the top! And you are the carpenter? " I yelled at Glomb. He just grumbled and continued nailing the shit together. I was stressed beyond belief. MTV had been nagging me about a faster delivery of episodes. Okay, so it was true.. I had been taking my long ass time.. But they scored great! What was the big deal? For the first time in a long time, I HAD TO do something, and I did not like it. "Yo! Where did Dico run off to? " I yelled at no one in particular. They all shrugged. "I think he went inside with Drea, half an hour ago. " Raab yelled. I rolled my eyes and ran inside. I walked up to Dico’s room and bange don the door. "Break it up love birds! Dicamillo, we need a voice over! Get down here in 5 minutes! " I heard a lot of curses coming from inside the room and I smirked. Mission accomplished.

~Drea’s POV~
Well, safe to say Dico wasn’t happy with that. But I couldn’t blame Bam, honestly. MTV had been bitchier than ever. Amazing what you get to hear once you live in this house. I smiled and kissed his temple. "Chill Babe, we’ll continue tonight.. Want to go to a movie or something? Just the two of us.. " He sighed, but smiled. "Yeah.. okay.. No, let me go see what the PMS-ing toddler needs. Christ.. " He muttered walking away. I chuckled softly and snuggled under the blankets again. I had never been a big nap person, but this house did things to you.. Well, rather the people that lived here did it..

~Your POV~
I was shivering like crazy. My guess, it was dark by now. The car sounds had died down, even the police and the ambulance had gone away a long time ago. I bet there was not trace from that accident anymore. People passing by that very spot, not aware that there might have died someone just hours ago. I didn’t know that for sure of course, but your mind wanders when you are alone for this long.. I had given up yelling a long time ago, my voice had almost completely disappeared. I heard a crack in the distance. "He-ello! Bam?!?! " My voice was barely audible. I had a coughing fit and doubled over. Why was no one coming?

~Bam’s POV~
I flopped down on the couch and sighed. We had filmed 10 episodes that weren’t even close to airing yet. In my opinion, I deserved a break. I had just shoved a sandwich in my mouth for dinner, I was ready to crash. I stood up, yawned and went to go upstairs. I stepped over Demon, patted his head and walked up the stairs. Incredible how big he’s gotten so fast. I’m glad I bought him.. I walked into mine and Chase’s room and fell face down on the bed. Hold on.. Cassie.. Demon.. Why did he have his leash? I jumped up and looked around, no Cassie.. Where was she?! Panic overtook my body as I bolted downstairs. Demon was laying asleep at the door, his leash still hooked to his collar. "Fuck, fuck.. FUCK! " I muttered looking for my shoes. "What’s up man? " A confused Ryan said walking out of the kitchen. "Where is Chase dude! We haven’t seen her all day and Demon just came walking in with his leash hooked to his collar! NO CASSIE! " I said frantically pulling on my shoes. He dropped his sandwich and yelled for the others. I just ran outside. She would never leave the yard would she? "Chase! Where are you!? " I yelled. No answer. Tears stung my eyes. Why didn’t I notice? She wasn’t there the entire day! Why didn’t I atleast see that the love of my fucking life wasn’t anywhere near! What if something happened!? Ryan and the others came running out too. "Here, this will help.. " Ryan said pressing a flashlight in my hands. He looked shocked too. I looked back, no one knew where to start. I bolted towards the forest, not caring if they followed me or not. I ran through the trees, jumped over logs and just screamed her name. "Chase! Please say something! Where are you!? " I was shining everywhere at once, I needed to find her, now.. How could I be so stupid? I saw other flashlights at the other end of the forest, the others had started there. "Chase! Answer me! Please! Are you there!? " I yelled. I wasn’t stopping until I found her. I had to find her..

Fifteen minutes later, still no use. Drea and Glomb had assured me she wasn’t in the other side. I just yelled at them to look again, no one was getting a seconds rest before she was found. "BAM! GET OVER HERE! " Glomb yelled from behind me. I whipped around and ran to the direction his voice came from. "Where are you dude? " I yelled. "Over here! " He was directly to my right. There she was. He had wrapped her in his jacket and hoodie, she was pale, deadly pale. Her lips where turning blue. I fell on my knees and wrapped my arms around her. "I’m so fucking sorry Chase.. I’m a fuck up.. sorry.. " Sobs escaped my lips. She was unconcious. "I called Raab, he’s getting a ATV.. " Glomb said rubbing over her arms to get her warmer. I undid my jacket and hoodie too and put them on her. As if on cue, the sound of the motor of the ATV came closer. I lifted her up and carried her out of the forest as fast as I could. She just had to get inside, in bed.. Then I knew everything would be fine. I wasn’t going to let her go. Never..

~Your POV~
I woke up to someones arms around me, rubbing gently but with force, to get me warm I guess. I was in a bed. I concentrated for a second. Bam. I felt my body still shaking. Before I could try to speak, I started coughing again. "Thank god.. " Bam breathed out. He hugged me tightly as I recovered from the coughing. I just squeezed my eyes shut and let him hug me. "Please tell me you’re okay.. please.. " He whispered. "I guess.. " I said, my voice was almost completely gone. He kissed me all over. "Thank you god, thank you.. " He mumbled between kisses. I couldn’t help but let a tear slip. "Bam, you know I don’t want much from you.. but what the HELL took you so long!? " I started crying. And for the first time in a long time, those tears where mostly caused by anger. "I don’t know how long I’ve been there, but it felt like a freaking eternity! " I turned to face him, he was completely quiet. "I really, don’t want to come across as some high maintenance chick who wants to know your whereabouts 24/7, but is it to much to ask to come see me at least a few times a day?! Never mind, guess that question was answered today huh..? " I mumbled ducking deeper under those blankets. "You’re right.. " Was all he said after five minutes. That was enough to get me to come up for air again. "You have every right to be angry. I’ve been so busy lately, with MTV and all that, so I let everything else, you, slip. I know it’s no excuse, but it is the reason.. He was talking softly. "I’m a fuck up, I know.. I don’t have a fucking clue where to start to get this right again. Just know I will never let it happen again. If you give me the chance to prove that of course.. " He was being dramatic, and he fucking well knew it. "You’re being a drama queen. " I said closing my eyes again. No emotion was in my voice at that moment. I hoped he got the hint. And he did. He stood up and left the room. I just laid on my back, eyes open.. seeing nothing. About half an hour later, Drea walked in, I smelled her perfume. "You know he’s crying right? " She said laying down next to me. I rolled my eyes. "You know.. for the first time in my whole life, I think he deserved it. I’m no selfish person Dre, you know I’m not.. But was it really that hard to come see me? To realise I wasn’t here? Does he really love me as much as he says he does? If so.. why didn’t he come sooner? Is his work his number one passion? " I shook my head furiously. I wasn’t used to feeling anger flowing throughout my body. "You know that’s bull Cass, you two are meant for each other.. " She said stroking my hair. "I sure as hell know it! But does he!? " I choked out before crying again. I think she was a little shocked by my swearing, I didn’t do that often. If I trusted anyone in my life, it was Bam.. But shit, wasn’t he supposed to love me back like that? Sometimes, it felt like I couldn’t spend a waking moment apart from him! I guess he just didn’t feel like that..

We laid there for a while. "You do realise that those doubts of yours.. are not based on anything? Yes, he’s been working a lot lately, but that has a reason. He’s worked so hard for all he has in his life, he can’t just quit now. You’ll always be his number one, you’ve always been and always will. He just has to make sacrifices, like being away from you.. to be able to stay with you. What if he just stopped all what he was doing? You have to work for the pleasures in life.. You know that just as well as I do Cass, he loves you, more than anything. And if he could give up his job, and just maintain the same lifestyle, he would surgically attach himself to you. " I hated it when she was right. I sighed deeply. "I know you’re right.. But what keeps him from doing that with a normal girl? I can’t help but question everything I do.. I know you all have told me before, and I know it.. But those doubts are not going to disappear, they never will. Why me, if you can have someone normal, who is prettier than me? " Drea groaned. "You’re a gorgeous girl.. And if you weren’t, who cares!? I would marry you just for who you are.. and i’m not kidding about that. But that’s what I’m here for. Bam is there for the whole loving part.. And just to emphasize my point, being that you are awesome, and not doubt yourself.. " She said kissing my temple. "Please don’t do that to yourself Cass, it hurts all of us.. seeing you like this.. " I nodded softly and laid back down again. "Could you ask if Bam could come in here..? " I asked her softly after a few minutes. She smiled. "Sure thing.. as long as you two keep it down huh..? " I blushed and threw a pillow to her direction. She chuckled. "Yeah.. missed me.. " She laughed before closing the door.

Five minutes later the door opened again. "Ehh, babe.. he left.. " Novak’s voice said softly. I shot straight up. "Oh please god don’t let him do something stupid.. " I mumbled. Novak hugged me. "Glomb and Dico already gone to look for him.. You okay..? " I shook my head. "I don’t think I’ll ever be okay if he isn’t with me.. It sounds sappy, I know.. But without him.. It truly feels like my heart is bleeding Bran.. " I said with a sigh.