Saint Vanity

I wanted to go up and touch her. But I felt like that would be strange. It was so wierd seeing Kennedy so vulnerable and fragile. Crinkled up on the toilet seat, wiping her eyes, She seemed like somone i didn't know.

Her mascara seemed to pour down like niagara falls. Like her face was melting.She finally saw me. She whipped her nose with a sleeve of her sweatshirt but the tears didn't stop. I took a few steps forward and touched the hinges of the stall door. Drooping my head down to hers I gave her a hug.

I hate hugs, Love receiving them, hate giving them. I always feel like somone is going to tell me I hug terribly or that no one likes when I hug them. I don't know why I always feel like that but I do. And I guess that stops me from being the 'sensitive faggot' every one at Bellsaw thinks I am. But I hugged the awkwardness away. I tried to forget how wierd I hug. I just held on.

Kennedy's tears came down harder. I patted her on the back like the kid I needed to be. The sensitive faggot role. Like in a movie and I needed to do what the sensitive faggots on television do, which was hug there friends when they cry, Even if it means being in the bathroom of the opposite sex. I think I might get an Oscar.

She cried for a damn good 5minutes. I just pretty much alternated patting and rubbing her back. Poor kid. I wish I knew what was going on in her head. But I didn't think she'd tell me. It wasn't really in her nature to let her pride of the hook. But we sat on the cold tiled floor of the chick's room. A girl walked in, saw us and immediately turned around. It was nice to know the Girls room had so much class.

The tears started to stop and Kennedy tried to get up. She held on to my Misfits shirt and I pulled her up in the hug, which I finally broke to look into her bloodshot eyes. She looked up at me and snorted a chuckle.

"...What?..." I looked around. Was there somthing I missed.

"Your nose is still bleeding you idiot." Kennedy couldn't hide the biggest smile. It made me feel great that i could bring back Old Kennedy with a silly little defect. nature knows just what to do.
I put some toilet paper in me nostril and gave Kennedy one last awkward hug before we went out to the crap car.

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I think we hit New York city because i could see buildings everywhere. The lights were on even thought it was about 3:00 in the afternoon. But It got dark early or so daylight-savings proclaims. I also knew we were in New York Because of all the horns beeping. In jersey we had those shit-head drivers who would always blare their horns but this was like ten times worse. I couldn't see how Joy was fast asleep. But she was drooling all over Todd's pride and Joy.
I sure wasn't gonna stop her.

Todd was still being a dick. He pt on some Elton John and that sent me over I was pretty much planning my suicide. Elton was cool. Don't get me wrong, he's legend. But after Rocket-man He starts to creep inside your brain and pours cyanide all over it. fucking bastard.

Maybe I could choke myself with the seat belt...

"Can we listen to somthing else PLEASE!!" I was begging the pussy! It made me feel like shit.

"GOD SIDNEY! Im driving!" Todd=dick

"....Yeah? can I change it?" I really was not in the mood for an imaturaty lecture.

"FINE IF IT WILL MAKE YOU SHUT UP!" Todd was all red faced now from yelling at me. And lets look at this in the right perspective eh? I, Sidney Clement, had asked one question. Just one. Does that verify me for a 'shut-up?' I dunno America, does it?

"hmmmm" Joy's eyes began to flutter open. What do you know, with all that yelling,Todd the dick woke up sleeping beauty. Nice one.

"Who woke me up?"Joy rubbed an eye.

"See! See Todd! That's how much of a dick you are! You woke up a perfectly innocent civilian with your Bitching and moaning!"

Todd glowered at me. And i stuck out my tongue, because I am that fucking cool.

"Shut up you ham heads Im listening to Iron maiden! Silence!" Kennedy's head rock back and forth as her lips moved to unknown words. God, what I would give to have remembered my Ipod. I would have asked for a head phone. But Kennedy was one of those people who disposed the ear buds. she liked the large Obnoxious headphones that couldn't be shared.

I Op end the large placement of Cd's Kennedy brought and Pulled out a Marylin Manson. Nothing like alittle offensive music to get the blood flowing. Not like my blood needed to flowing in this fucking car driven by the king pussy!

But Sweet dreams started up and the whole screaming on the "Some of them want to be A-
BUSED!" That pretty much got me thinking about the world again which happens quite often but when I have music that fits my mood it goes straight to happy-land. But for once I started thinking of somthing useful. Why were we driving in Todd's car, Better yet why were we running away. And what were we running away from. It seemed like we had a reason but nobody actually clarified the purpose.

I wanted to ask Kennedy but disturbing her listening to Maiden was pretty much like a death wish. Now that Elton John was no longer playing, I no longer wanted to commit suicide. Funny how so many kids think they have no way out of suicide, when really all they have to do it step away from the bridge, gun, rope or knife...or any other creative ideas, and change the music.

But any who, The purpose of this car ride was still under mist to me. I looked at Kennedy she could pretty much raid an army. But she doesn't have any real free will stealing power. We all did this by choice. Why though? Why was I running away? And was it really running away? Besides that fact that, yes were in a car, and no, were not really that far away. We were still abandoning our average lives for this...adventure, right word?

Kennedy's head slowed to a stop and her lips stopped there movement. Now would be a good time as any to ask. So here goes nothing.

"Ken, Why are we running away? Whats the reason?" I put my chin on the head part of the seat so I could see her face. She looked alittle concerned. Like maybe she was hopping I wouldn't ask. But Kennedy was to witty to let a little expression judge my guess.

"Well Its simple Sid, Were not running away, We are going away. And second of all I personally was flipping shit about life, so there's my reason. I can really only say that My reason was the reason we took action. But I can't say there was a universal Answer."

"But why did everyone else come along? I don't understand?" the bumps were making my teeth chatter, like the rest of my head wasn't connected to my jaw.

Kennedy shrugged. "Well lets see, Todd over there did it to show his parents and, lets face it Silvia Sweet, that he can be a responsible adult when times like this take there shit."

"HEY! I did not!" Todd, as usual had nothing good to say. So he shut up. Thank God.

"Joy, did it because she is sick of being the kid who always says no, She some kind of mental retaliation, to make her do somthing 'bad'"

Joy just sort of blushed.

"And you my dear Sidney came along because you need to find what life wants out of ya, You wanna know what Gilly and Silvia, Todd and I all think when you figure it out." Kennedy smiled.

I just sat there with my mouth wide open. I didn't even know why i went but Kennedy was able to spell it out with out a second thought. I suppose it was true. I had no idea what the hell I was doing but, I didn't really think i was all that into the whole I'm-going-off-to-find-myself! Im pretty sure that's only what kids in movies did.

Well I had time to sit and ponder that more.