Don't Stop If I Fall

“Beep…beep…beep…” I awoke to a constant beeping and the humming of machines. I opened my eyes slowly, white objects surrounding me. Everything was so bright. I looked to my left to see my mother, asleep in a chair. I tried to say something but nothing came out. Finally, she slowly opened her eyes.

“Oh my god!” mom whispered and started to cry. She came over and hugged me. I laid in shock and unsure of what was going on. I realized now that I was in a hospital. I didn’t remember anything that happened.

Next thing I knew the doctor came into the room and led my mother and I into a plain white room with two chairs. I sat in one and the doctor sat in the other.

“Now, can you tell me your name?” He asked me.

“Ava” I mouthed. The doctor frowned.

“Try clearing your throat, and tell me out loud.”

“Ava.” I answered.

“Good, now what month is it?” he asked.

“October…” I whispered.

“Excellent. Just follow this light with your eyes now,” he pointed a little light at my eyes and made it go in a circular motion. I followed slowly, starting to remember what had happened the night before.

An hour later I was let out of the hospital. I sat in the car with my mother, as she scolded me.

“I don’t want you walking in the middle of the road at night. Especially on a Friday night!” she explained, tapping the steering wheel with her newly painted red nails. “You understand me?”

“I know mom, I’m sorry, I was just out of it.” I confessed. She didn’t even seem to care anymore that I was just in a hospital, and could’ve died. That’s my mother for ya.
“Oh, here’s your cell phone. They made me take all of your belongings from your pockets.” She mumbled, throwing the little object at my lap. I looked at the chipped side of it and turned it on.

The rest of the drive home was quiet. Mom drove as I watched the cars pass by. I especially enjoyed seeing the old asses driving around in their big shot cars, with a cigarette hanging out the window. But what also caught my eye, were the big mini vans. They were filled with little kids who were probably brothers and sisters, and were driven around by their daddy and mommy who scolded them as I watched them jump around in the back seat. How I wanted a normal family so bad.

Suddenly, I felt a vibrate come from my pocket. I opened my phone to find my IM had opened on my phone automatically. Gerard was Iming me.

Gerard: OMG ARE YOU OKAY?!?!?!?! I heard about the accident! I wanted to go to the hospital but my grandma wouldn’t let me! Im so sorry, I would’ve walked you home but I was being an asshole last night!

Ava: oh uh yeah I’m fine. Nothing serious. Sorry I gtg, im on my phone and its almost dead. Bi.

I signed out before he could say anything else. For some reason I just didn’t want to talk to him. I closed my phone and continued staring out the car window until I got home.

It was Saturday afternoon. And I had nothing to do. Before she went to work, Mom told me to rest, but I couldn’t take just laying in my bed for the rest of my day. I went outside to the backyard, where I hadn’t been in ever since my brother died. I stared at my old clubhouse, and slowly made my way over to the rotted ladder that could’ve just broke right then and there. I made my way up to the top. As I climbed inside, I darted cobwebs and cleaned off the old pillow that was musty from being in the closed up house for so long.

I picked up an old box of things that my brother and I used to play with up here when we were small. There were magazines, barbie dolls, puzzles, a soccer ball, and scattered markers at the bottom of the box. A tear fell from my eye as a took out a bent photograph.

It was a picture taken about four years ago, when I was about ten and my brother was twelve. It was of myself, my brother, my mom, and my dad in Disney World for my tenth birthday. When we were a happy family. I was wearing a little pink shirt with Minnie Mouse on it and wearing Mickey Mouse ears that matched my brother. He was hugging me and making me laugh for the camera.

I carefully put the picture in my sweatshirt pocket and closed the box up again. Then, I slowly climbed out of the tree house and made my way to the bottom.

“Hey…” I heard a voice behind me and made me jump a little.

“Oh sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” I turned around. It was Gerard.

“Oh no, its okay. I’m fine.” I insisted as I calmed my self down from the shock.

“I’m really sorry about yesterday. My friends were just out of line.” He said, looking ashamed.

“Oh…” I blurted out. Gerard turned red.

“Okay, you know what? Well, I know we just met and stuff, but…I think I kind of like you.

You’re the first person I’ve ever known who I can just think about and smile. I know that sounds COMPLETELY lame, but its true. Its something about you that makes me…happy.” His words shot through my head like a bullet. I was speechless.

“…me?” I managed to get out.

“Uh…yeah…” Gerard looked toward the ground and started kicking the dirt.

“Oh…well…I think I feel the same way.” I blurted out without thinking.

“Really?” he looked up, shocked.

“Um yeah, you’ve been my only friend ever since my brother…well you know. And you’re the only person to ever make me smile in the past three months.” I said shyly and blushed. Now I was staring at the ground as he stared at me in shock.

Finally, after about thirty seconds of an awkwark silence, I looked up. Gerard casually looked at his watch.

“Oh shit, I gotta go. I’m supposed to be helping my grandma with some house work and Mikey’s covering for me. Sorry.” He said.

“Oh alright. Uh talk to you later?” I questioned.

“Yeah.” He smiled. He looked nervous, then leaned over to me and kissed me on the cheek. “Bye.” He ran off, and left me standing there in aw.

“Bye,” I whispered softly, and smiled.