Spiral Static

When I was in high school, we learned once about Murphy’s Law. Roughly summed up: Whatever can go wrong, will go wrong. I’d always found the idea rather pessimistic. It wasn’t until I applied the concept to literature that could I really see a point to things going wrong at all. You see, if the hero or heroine in a book or play is happy ... truly happy ... then there’s no need for a story at all.

Hardship builds character. School of Hard Knocks. The refining fire.

All of those phrases presented bittersweet thoughts of hope amidst adversity, so simple to recite or cross-stitch onto an insipid hand towel, but when it was your turn to have your character built ... well, let’s just say no amount of helpful phrases or proverbs will make it any easier. It’s torment. But you grow from it, and in the end, hopefully you have a story worth telling.

My ticket, it seemed, had come up. I was, after all, far too happy for it not to.

Things began to turn south with a random, unrelated event, but it set the mood for the whole day. Or rather ruined it.

My cell phone rang as Edward and I were driving toward London from Yorkshire. I didn’t recognize the number, but I picked it up anyway, wondering if Renée was calling from a payphone or something. She was always losing her phone.

It wasn’t Renée. The person on the other line didn’t say anything when I answered with a cheerful greeting. After all, I was having a wonderful day up until that point. Things with Edward were good. No, perfect. We’d been joking and laughing and flirting with each other since we’d woken up that morning with cotton grass and heather in our hair.

On the phone, I heard a sniffling sound. It didn’t seem as though whoever it was on the other end was crying, but rather inhaling and exhaling, their breath ragged with anger and grief.

“Hello?” I asked, brow creasing. My heart twisted a bit in my chest. I had heard anguished sounds like that before. Felt it myself, even, when Edward had broken my heart so long ago and left me in the woods.

I bit my lip. Then turned my head away from Edward and lowered my voice, though I knew he would hear me anyway. “Jacob, is that you?”

Edward’s head turned in my direction slowly, his hair blowing in the wind from the open windows. I couldn’t see his eyes. I wasn’t sure I wanted to.

The other line slammed down, cutting off. Then the operator kindly informed me that if I would like to make a call, I should hang up and stop waiting for my former best friend to accept my newfound marital status to a vampire.

A long moment of silence weighed on the car. Then Edward spoke in a careful tone. “How did he get your new phone number?”

I shrugged, despondent. “Charlie, maybe.”

“Not surprising. I don’t think I’m the son-in-law your father was hoping for.”

I don’t know why, but his words made me angry. Not the words themselves exactly, but the whole stupid situation. “I don’t think it’s that, Edward. Charlie and I both care about Jacob. It has nothing to do with you.” The words were a little more pointed than I intended them to be. I didn’t mean to lash out at Edward. I was just ... frustrated. Hurt.

“I see.”

“Oh, don’t get your feelings hurt.”

He scoffed. “I’m not the one that got all weepy when the mutt called.”

“No!” I said, throwing my hands up. “We are not going to do this today! I am so tired of arguing with you.”

Edward took a deep breath and let it out in a sharp sigh. Eyes still fixed on the road ahead, he reached over to take my hand. “I’m sorry, Bella. We’ll drop it.”

I nodded in agreement, though tears stung the corners of my eyes. We both fell silent, our blissful mood spoiled.

***

The tension lasted through the first few days in London. It wasn’t terrible at first, but slowly it got worse and worse. Neither of us actually said anything to the other that would imply we were angry, but it was there nevertheless.

We didn’t talk much. I tried sometimes, especially when we were out walking in the city. He’d been to London before, and I wanted him to show me the places he enjoyed the most. He did, but he held my hand and guided me almost like it was expected of him rather than something he particularly wanted to do. His whole demeanor was tense. Grim. His mind obviously elsewhere.

Finally I couldn’t stand it anymore. We were on a tour of the Tower of London, hovering just outside the edges of a tour group that was gaping inappropriately at the spot where Anne Boleyn had lost her head. We’d been waiting for a cloudy day so that we could take that tour, but Edward wasn’t paying attention. He was staring off into the distance, not listening to the tour guide. He wouldn’t even look at me.

“What is your deal?” I finally hissed, swatting him with a map to get his attention.

He turned to blink at me, confused by my sudden outburst. “What are you talking about?” His words were distracted, as if he wasn’t listening to me even then.

That got me fuming. “This is just silly, Edward. You have no right to be angry with me just because I took a phone call from Jacob when I didn’t even know it was Jacob!”

Edward looked at me – finally looked at me instead of right through me or over my shoulder. His face appeared genuinely perplexed. “What are you talking about?” he repeated. “I’m not angry with you. I forgot about that days ago.”

That threw me for a moment. “Well, if you’re not angry, then why have you been so uggh?”

The corner of his mouth twitched. “Uggh?”

“You’ve been ignoring me for days, Edward.”

He stared at me, his face a mask. “Sorry,” he said finally, reaching out to brush my cheek with his knuckles. “I didn’t even realize I was doing it.”

I watched him carefully after that, convinced he was hiding something from me. That was a bad habit of his, especially when he thought he was keeping something from me for my own good.

He was never exactly unkind to me, but he continued not to look at me or talk to me unless I specifically requested his notice. If I managed to get him focused, he was as pleasant to me as he ever was, like a different person. He took me where ever I wanted to go and pleaded with me to allow him to buy me presents, then went against my wishes and bought them for me anyway when my back was turned. He made love to me at night and kissed me awake in the morning. If it was sunny outside, we would stay in the hotel all day sometimes not leaving the bed until twilight. Those were the best days. On those days, Edward was almost able to pretend he wasn’t preoccupied with other matters.

Eventually I figured out what was wrong with him. I had misinterpreted his inattentiveness and the way he had stopped walking beside me but rather tended to fall back a step or two. Edward wasn’t angry with me. He hadn’t lost interest in me either.

He was guarding me.

Every ounce of his attention and energy was focused on that one activity.

With that new knowledge, I could understand the other things he did with better clarity. His ears were always prickling, it seemed. I realized that his long silences occurred because he was listening to the thoughts of everyone around us, searching for something. He concentrated so hard on his hearing that his eyes would often go unfocused, which explained the way he would often stare right through me.

He talked with Alice and Carlisle on the phone often, in hushed tones so that I couldn’t hear what was being discussed. But when I asked him what was wrong, he would just smile and tug me close to him for a kiss until I forgot all about what I was saying. If not for his bizarre behavior, I would have assumed that everything was right with the world. I couldn’t for the life of me figure out what had him so unnerved.

Until we got to Paris, that is. That’s when it all changed.

We took a train there. The one that goes under the English Channel. Edward was unusually relaxed that day, happy to leave England behind us, I suppose. We even fooled around a bit on the train. It got very dark in that tunnel, and we took advantage of it. Edward didn’t even break the train; I was very proud of him. Granted, that was probably because he still wasn’t allowing himself any kind of release with me. But that was another matter altogether, yet another subject that he wouldn’t discuss with me no matter how hard I tried.

Paris was awash with tourists. Asian, European, American, Indian. All with their fanny packs tightened and their camera lenses uncorked. The city was beautiful, full of art, architecture, and people kissing and cuddling with each other in broad daylight. It was after all The City of Love. I resented them a bit ... the people who walked in front of us with their arms around each other, or the couple we passed stretched out on a patch of grass next to the River Seine, eyes locked, oblivious to everyone around them. Sure, I was there with Edward, my hand held firmly within his own, but he was a million miles away.

Apparently, whatever was bothering Edward in London had started bothering him in Paris as well.

I tried to enjoy myself and ignore my personal-bodyguard-slash-husband as we made our way through Notre Dame and the Sainte-Chapelle. Edward hovered around me like a second shadow, looking as though he would jump anyone who glanced at me funny. Needless to say, people began to give us a wide berth wherever we tread.

“There are too many people in this city,” Edward muttered once as we toured the Louvre. “I can barely hear myself think over all their thoughts. Like bees, all humming.”

It was the longest sentence he’d put together in days.

I grew despondent. I missed home, where everything was normal. I missed Charlie. Jacob. My truck. But more than anything, I just missed Edward. I missed seeing him smile. I missed talking to him. I missed the way he would stare me into a puddle on the ground.

That night, he took me to dinner at a nice bistro near the Left Bank, probably as penance for the way he was acting. The food was ridiculously tasty – cheeses and spices and flavors that we just didn’t get in a town like Forks – but I could barely choke it down. I didn’t have much of an appetite. Before me, Edward stared through me, patiently waiting for me to finish with my meal but on edge all the same. He had dark shadows under his eyes.

“Will you hunt tonight?” I asked, trying to start up a conversation.

“I don’t believe so. No.”

“You look hungry. It’s been over a week since you hunted in Yorkshire.”

“I said no, Bella.” The words were gentle but firm.

I prickled. “Why?”

“Because I’m not leaving you alone, and you can’t come with me.”

What he said surprised me – not the words themselves but the honesty behind them. It was the closest he had come to telling me something was remotely amiss. “Edward?” I asked, pushing my food around my plate without interest.

His eyes focused on my face.

“Are you ever going to tell me what’s wrong?”

He had a piece of bread in his hand. I watched as he ground it in his fingers until it was nothing but crumbs.

“Bella,” he began slowly. “How disappointed would you be if we cut our trip short?”

My heart twisted in my chest. I set my fork down on my plate and chose my words carefully. “I guess that would depend on the reason.”

He didn’t offer one. “There’s a flight tomorrow evening that has seats available. I could make the reservations tonight.”

I stared at him, cheeks flushing in anger. “You’re really not going to tell me, are you?”

Another piece of bread disintegrated in his hands. “I promise I’ll make it up to you, Bella. The trip, I mean. I just feel the sudden urge to be near family is all. Carlisle agrees. So does Alice.”

I threw my napkin on my plate. “So I guess you can talk about it with them but not with your wife.”

I didn’t speak to Edward for the rest of the evening. He booked the tickets when we got back to our hotel, leaving the packing for the next day since the flight wasn’t until the evening. I wasn’t angry that we were leaving. Disappointed maybe, but I would have understood if it was something important. Rather, I was furious at his refusal to include me in the loop.

I went to bed, still fuming, but it was a long time before I could fall asleep. The light from the window kept me up. Edward stood there, fully dressed, silent and still as death, watching the street through the cracked blinds. He was still there, unmoving even hours later, when I finally managed to fall asleep.

***

Edward woke me in the middle of the night with so much urgency that I had to bite back a scream. He was humming with tension, like a guitar that had been strung too tight.

“What is it?” I asked him over and over, but he wouldn’t answer me. He just forced my arms through my shirt and helped me pull on my jeans. Apparently the speed at which I dressed myself wasn’t quick enough. After he finished with me, he began throwing our clothes into the suitcase, not caring where they landed.

“Are we leaving now?” I gasped. “Edward, it’s three in the morning. We’ll never get a flight.”

He ran shaking fingers through his hair as he grew frustrated with packing. “I don’t think we’ll be able to carry these with us,” he said, more to himself than to me. “The bags will slow us down.”

He abandoned them, only pausing to retrieve our passports and some money. Then he grabbed me by the wrist and hauled me out of the hotel. I wasn’t even wearing a jacket.

“Please tell me what’s happening,” I begged him as he marched me toward the train station. The night was dark, the hour late, but a few night clubs were still in business. Drunken patrons tripped and stumbled about the streets, probably headed to their nice, safe homes. A few were sober enough to glance up at us in concerned suspicion. I realized it must look to all the world that Edward was about to take me into a dark corner to rape and maim me. Not only was Edward on fire with anger and tension, not bothering to hide it from his face, but my bruises still hadn’t entirely healed.

His cell phone rang. Without even glancing at the caller, he picked it up and said, “Do you know where they are? I can hear them, clearer now that I know what to listen for, but they haven’t shown themselves.”

It was Alice, I realized. And someone was out there following us. Several someones. Whoever they were, Edward was hell-bent on avoiding them.

“Why didn’t you see this earlier?” he spat, furious. Then he sighed, tightening his grip on my arm. “I know, I know. I’m sorry. It’s as though I’m being blocked as well. I’m taking Bella to the train station now, and we should be at the airport soon enough. I’ll buy a damn airplane if I have to.”

He hauled me onto the Metro, into an empty car, and cursed loudly when he lost the cell phone signal. He wouldn’t let me sit down, insisting that we stand by the door. He kept one arm around me and the other on the overhead bar to steady us.

“Edward...” I whispered, tugging at his shirt so that he had to look at me. “Please. ”

He exhaled slowly, then pressed his face into my hair, pulling me into an unexpected embrace. “Oh, Bella,” he said, rocking me. “I should never have tried to take you to Europe. I’m so sorry. I’m such a fool to think they wouldn’t notice.”

I pulled away and stared at him, uncomprehending. Then I flashed back, remembering the last time I’d seen that look on his face. “You think the Volturi are after us, don’t you?” My voice sounded dead, empty, even to my ears that were so alive and alert at that moment.

The train slowed to a stop. A handful of new passengers entered the train a few cars down from us on both sides.

Edward cupped my face in his hand, trying his best to soothe me. “I don’t know what to think yet. Maybe it’s them. Maybe I’m just insane. I don’t know anything, Bella, and it’s driving me mad.”

“How can you not know anything? You’re Edward.”

“Well. I do know a few things. I know that there’s more than one of them. I know that they’re vampires, but they’re much more than just that. The best hunters I’ve ever encountered. Not that we’ve exactly been hidden from view, but that they’ve managed to hide themselves from me with such precision. They’re blocking me somehow from being able to hear their thoughts. Alice, too. But every now and then I catch a glimpse. Hear a voice in my head. Catch the tail-end of their scent. Ever since the first night after we landed, Bella. It’s like they were waiting for us.”

He pulled me close again. “How you must despise me, Bella, for keeping this from you. The truth was I wasn’t even sure anything was wrong. They’re so good, that even Alice called me paranoid at first. Delusional. She saw nothing of this coming, not until tonight. I didn’t want to ruin this trip for you just because my imagination was running rampant. So I kept vigil so that you could at least enjoy yourself.”

“What did Alice see?” I asked. Somehow my voice was steady, but my heart was thundering in my chest.

He could hear it, too, and he put his palm flat against my chest. “Shhh...” he whispered as he kissed my forehead. “Everything’s going to be fine. I’m going to take you home.”

“What did Alice see, Edward? ”

But before he could answer, his nose suddenly flared, his eyes flickering to that terrifying shade of black. And then before I knew what was happening, I was facing the opposite direction, positioned against the wall with Edward standing in front of me.

The conjoining doors that led from the car next to us opened, and Edward growled in a way I’d only heard a few times in my life. Fear nearly split me in half.

The new passengers I had seen get on the train moments before ... well, they weren’t people at all. They were beautiful, each one more so than the next. Pale, slender, graceful, ageless.

Vampires.

At the other end of our car, another door opened. More came. There were ten or twelve of them in all, grinning pleasantly at us, coming at us from both sides. Cornering us. Surrounding us.