Betrayal Takes Two
I Discover Love
It's been about a month since I first met Trent and the whole crew. Tegan and Trent were officially going out and there was no way I could stop them. Trent rented out a huge house somewhere near the beach and we were heading over there for a week, just to relax. I brought all my painting materials knowing that there will be a lot of things to capture. The drive was about four hours long, I sat in the back with Ziggy and Brian, the rest of the guys were in a car behind us. I've been pretty quite the whole time as everyone was socializing. I noticed Trent looking back at me once in a while in his mirror as he drove, I didn't know what to think of it. We got to the beach house at noon and it was absolutely stunning. I got out of the car and stared at the beach and the waves as everyone put their shit inside. "You gonna help out or stare all day?" Tegan screamed out to me. I grabbed my stuff and headed inside. "Trent says we have assigned rooms! What the fuck is this, high school?" Twiggy complained as he threw himself on the couch in the living room. I shrugged and went over to the window just staring at the view. "It's beautiful, isn't it?" I heard a whisper in my ear, sending goose-bumps down my spine. I knew it was Trent, but it still made me jump. I heard him walk away and turned around, leaning against the window observing everyones excitement. "Let me show you your rooms, come on." Trent said and we all followed up the stairs. " This one is Tegan's and mine, this one is Dandi's because it has a lot of light, probably the best view in the house. I know you wanted to paint here..." Trent said giving me a wink, "This one is Brian's, Twiggy's, Pogo's, Robin's, Jerome's..." he pointed them out one by one but I just went in to mine and looked around. It was huge and the ceiling was glass. I laid down on the floor and looked up. I've never experienced anything so relaxing and amazing before. It made me think how lucky I got when I ran away from home, shit could have been a lot more worse. "You okay?You looked dead there for a second!" Trent once again managed to scare the shit out of me as he kneeled over me, making me jump like crazy. "Don't do that!" I kind of yelled, upset that he frightened me, especially while I was crying over stupid shit. His expression changed and he got up and started walking away. "Wait! I'm sorry, you just scared the shit out of me. Come here, you gotta see this..." I told him and he put a smirk on his face. He laid down and observed the sky. "This IS...wow. God I should've made this my room" he let out a laugh. "Too late!" We laid there in silence for about five minutes when from the corner of my eyes I saw him staring at me. I turned my head and met his eyes, immediately blushing. "Y-yeah?" I asked nervously. "Have you ever done a self portrait?" Trent asked quietly as I shook my head no. "Why not?" I sighed and closed my eyes. "It wouldn't sell, and I wouldn't want it laying around my house, that's just creepy. I can paint a lot more beautiful things than myself." I told him sitting up, this conversation was making me feel like shit. "I'd buy it. Paint me one, I want to have a piece of you forever" He said while getting up and walking out the door. I didn't quite know what to think of what he just said.
At around 9:30 everyone decided to get smashed. I didn't really drink because recently I've been getting moody. The whole Tegan and Trent business often caused that but there was nothing I could do about it, I love Tegan to death, she was my best friend, she saved me. I didn't talk to anyone and just observed. Brian looked pissed off for some reason, he caught me staring at him and glared at me. I looked down and walked outside, it was dark and windy. I sat near the beach and took out a piece of paper, a letter I've been working on that I wanted to add to one of my paintings.
Dear ______
Should I jump in and see where the sea could take me? To a different universe, a different world underneath. A place where no one is corrupt and no one is human any longer. Once I drown I am a piece of the world, bits and pieces of me will scatter to the 7 continents and thousands of islands. Or...Once I drown, I drown. I will be forgotten, everything will come to an end. Should I open the red velvet curtains and enter reality or imagination?
I paused for a second and looked behind me to see Brian reading what I just wrote. I quickly crumpled it up into a small ball and put it in my pocket. "What the fuck are you doing?" I asked hurt that he was invading my personal space. "Who was that to?" he asked in a curious tone with a smirk on his face. " No one" I turned around and started walking quickly down the beach, away from him and the house. "What? Don't worry you can tell me about your secret lover that no one else knows about. I must say though, that sounded pretty suicidal to me." He ran up close to me. "Brian, please just go away" I told him while stopping, he looked pissed off again. He wouldn't walk away so I walked towards the house again, I saw Trent standing on the porch watching us. " I know your secret I don't think it's a good idea to run..." Brian said following me. "You don't know anything about me!" I somewhat yelled and quickly ran inside, past Trent and up to my room. I locked my door, put on "Triple Sun" by Coil and sat on the edge of my window breathing in the scent of the sea. I heard knocks on my door but I just ignored them, I don't understand why they think it's weird to be alone for a few fucking hours. I leaned my head against the middle of the window frame and closed my eyes, just listening to my heart beat and the waves. "What's going on?" I heard a voice so light I wasn't sure I heard it. I opened my eyes as I felt two pairs of hands wrap around my waist, "come on, get down this is unsafe" Trent said in a calm voice. "Why won't all of you just leave me alone for a second?" I asked and leaned against the wall. "Why are you acting so weird lately?" He asked in the same tone I was talking in, he was trying to figure me out but he couldn't, no one could. "I'm acting norma-" "No you're not!" he cut me off, slowly running his hands through his hair. "No, I am. You just don't know me." I told him and he let out an annoying laugh. "I've known you for about a month, I think I know you" he replied and started walking up and down my room like he was thinking. "Exactly, a month. Surprise surprise, this is me!" I said holding out my hands, Trent stopped walking. "Well then you're probably the strangest person I've ever met" he said in a low tone. "Probably" I replied looking at the moon and then heading towards my bed. "Sorry...sometimes when I get upset I have a hard time controlling my emotions" I said and sat down, playing with my fingers. "Understood" he said lightly as we sat in silence for a bit, thinking. We did that pretty often recently. "Brian said tha-" Trent began saying "-Brian is drunk and angry and acting like a total dick, okay?" I told him while looking over and meeting his eyes. He nodded and got up to walk away "Good night" he said and left. The party continued up until 1:30am, but I tried to block it all out with my music and thoughts.
At around 9:30 everyone decided to get smashed. I didn't really drink because recently I've been getting moody. The whole Tegan and Trent business often caused that but there was nothing I could do about it, I love Tegan to death, she was my best friend, she saved me. I didn't talk to anyone and just observed. Brian looked pissed off for some reason, he caught me staring at him and glared at me. I looked down and walked outside, it was dark and windy. I sat near the beach and took out a piece of paper, a letter I've been working on that I wanted to add to one of my paintings.
Dear ______
Should I jump in and see where the sea could take me? To a different universe, a different world underneath. A place where no one is corrupt and no one is human any longer. Once I drown I am a piece of the world, bits and pieces of me will scatter to the 7 continents and thousands of islands. Or...Once I drown, I drown. I will be forgotten, everything will come to an end. Should I open the red velvet curtains and enter reality or imagination?
I paused for a second and looked behind me to see Brian reading what I just wrote. I quickly crumpled it up into a small ball and put it in my pocket. "What the fuck are you doing?" I asked hurt that he was invading my personal space. "Who was that to?" he asked in a curious tone with a smirk on his face. " No one" I turned around and started walking quickly down the beach, away from him and the house. "What? Don't worry you can tell me about your secret lover that no one else knows about. I must say though, that sounded pretty suicidal to me." He ran up close to me. "Brian, please just go away" I told him while stopping, he looked pissed off again. He wouldn't walk away so I walked towards the house again, I saw Trent standing on the porch watching us. " I know your secret I don't think it's a good idea to run..." Brian said following me. "You don't know anything about me!" I somewhat yelled and quickly ran inside, past Trent and up to my room. I locked my door, put on "Triple Sun" by Coil and sat on the edge of my window breathing in the scent of the sea. I heard knocks on my door but I just ignored them, I don't understand why they think it's weird to be alone for a few fucking hours. I leaned my head against the middle of the window frame and closed my eyes, just listening to my heart beat and the waves. "What's going on?" I heard a voice so light I wasn't sure I heard it. I opened my eyes as I felt two pairs of hands wrap around my waist, "come on, get down this is unsafe" Trent said in a calm voice. "Why won't all of you just leave me alone for a second?" I asked and leaned against the wall. "Why are you acting so weird lately?" He asked in the same tone I was talking in, he was trying to figure me out but he couldn't, no one could. "I'm acting norma-" "No you're not!" he cut me off, slowly running his hands through his hair. "No, I am. You just don't know me." I told him and he let out an annoying laugh. "I've known you for about a month, I think I know you" he replied and started walking up and down my room like he was thinking. "Exactly, a month. Surprise surprise, this is me!" I said holding out my hands, Trent stopped walking. "Well then you're probably the strangest person I've ever met" he said in a low tone. "Probably" I replied looking at the moon and then heading towards my bed. "Sorry...sometimes when I get upset I have a hard time controlling my emotions" I said and sat down, playing with my fingers. "Understood" he said lightly as we sat in silence for a bit, thinking. We did that pretty often recently. "Brian said tha-" Trent began saying "-Brian is drunk and angry and acting like a total dick, okay?" I told him while looking over and meeting his eyes. He nodded and got up to walk away "Good night" he said and left. The party continued up until 1:30am, but I tried to block it all out with my music and thoughts.