We All Want to Party When the Funeral Ends
The Past Ain't Through With You
Why I had come I’ll never know. I stared at the mass of black clothed people standing around my ex-best friend’s casket in the center of the cemetery. I guess I came because she used to be a great friend. Well, she made her mistakes. But she made one bad “mistake” that wrecked our friendship.
I took a deep breath and got out of my car, the cold November air hitting my exposed legs. I straightened the black skirt I was wearing and pulled my jacket tightly around my body as I started toward the funeral. I was almost there when I saw him. I stopped walking and stared at him. It had been 8 years since I had seen him, but he still looked the same. His ebony hair was longer, but he still looked the same.
As if sensing someone staring at him, he looked in my direction and our eyes met. I just stared at him. Then he did something I definitely didn’t expect; he smiled. He smiled! At a funeral. Bastard. I returned his smile with a glare. I didn’t want to be here now. He had the nerve to smile at me after what he had done to me. Him and Nicole. My best friend and my first and only love. It had been 8 bitter years since that day, and it still hurt to think about it. I turned around and closed my eyes tightly to keep the tears I felt coming from escaping. I opened my eyes and started back to my car quickly. As I started to open the car door, a hand shot out from behind me and held the door so I couldn’t open it. I saw the person’s reflection in the window. It was him.
“Go away, Gerard,” I said.
“Amanda,” he said. I could feel his breath on the back of my head. He was standing close behind me.
“Please just leave me alone,” I whispered. I shut my eyes tightly again but a stray tear escaped.
I felt his breath on my ear now.
“I killed her, Amanda,” he whispered, his lips brushing my ear as he spoke. I gasped and opened my eyes that widened with shock and fear. I turned to face him and pressed my back against my car.
“Y-You w-what?” I said, my voice trembling. He reached a hand to my hair and I flinched. He gently stroked my dark brown hair, a soft smile on his lips.
“I killed Nicole,” he said, his eyes never leaving mine.
“W-Why?” I asked. I felt very afraid. I couldn’t picture Gerard actually killing someone, and he had just admitted to doing just that. He admitted to killing my ex-best friend. The person he had cheated on me with.
Gerard stopped stroking my hair and placed a hand on my cheek. The small smile left his lips and he suddenly looked serious.
“I couldn’t forget your face when you saw me with Nicole,” he said. “Everyday for the past 8 years I’ve been tortured with the guilt of hurting you. I had to do something about
it. I always loved you.”
I stared at him in disbelief.
“Liar,” I said. “You’re a liar. If you loved me you wouldn’t have cheated on me. You broke my heart and I haven’t been able to move on. I can’t forget you and I can’t trust anyone.”
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“What the fuck ever,” I said. I pushed him away and quickly got into my car. He just stood back and watched as I started my car and left. I wished I had never come. I drove by a bar and decided to try and have a little bit of fun. Or just drown my sorrow.
~A few hours later~
I stumbled out of the bar. I was drunk. I went to my car and leaned against it, dizzy from all the alcohol I had consumed. I closed my eyes, loving the feeling of the cold air after being in the very warm bar.
“Amanda?” I heard a voice say. I groaned, and opened my eyes. Of course, there stood Gerard. Why couldn’t he just leave me alone?
“Leave me the fuck alone,” I slurred. I stopped leaning on my car and went around to the driver’s side, almost falling in the short distance. I was about to get in when Gerard grabbed my arm and pulled me back.
“I don’t think you should drive,” he said. I ripped my arm angrily from his grasp.
“Fuck off,” I said. I was about to get into my car when I was suddenly overcome with a nauseous feeling in my stomach. I turned around and began throwing up, just missing Gerard’s feet. When I was done my throat burned. I felt like I was going to pass out and then everything went black.
I opened my eyes and groaned. My head was throbbing. I sat up slowly and looked around the unfamiliar bedroom I was in. Where was I?
As if reading my thoughts, a door to my right opened and, unfortunately, Gerard came in. He saw I was awake and smiled. I scowled and took the medicine and water he was offering me.
“How do you feel?” he asked.
Instead of answering him I laid back down and rolled over onto my side so my back faced Gerard. I heard Gerard sigh and felt the bed shift as he sat on it, next to me.
“I never meant to hurt you,” he said. “Sleeping with Nicole was a mistake. When you left, I never got to tell you how sorry I was. I didn’t know how to show you how much you meant to me and how sorry I was.”
“Did you really kill her?” I asked, finally deciding to say something.
“Yes,” he said. “I made it look like an accident so I won’t get caught. I felt that killing her was the only way to show you how important you are to me.”
I sat up and looked at him.
“Why did you even sleep with her in the first place?” I asked.
“I don’t know,” he said. “It just sort of happened. We were both a little drunk and the next think I know I’m with Nicole in my bedroom. By the time I realized what I was doing you had walked in and saw us.”
I didn’t know what to say. I placed my face in my hands. He had killed someone. For me. But he cheated on me. Yet he was drunk so he didn’t have the best judgment..
Did I still love him? Yes.
Could I forgive him? Probably. Everyone makes mistakes. I could be happy again. The past 8 years have been lonely and depressing. I needed to feel loved. And here was someone who loved me. And I loved him. He even killed someone to show his love for me.
I lifted my face out of my hands and looked at Gerard.
“I think I want to give you another chance,” I said; almost not believe I was actually doing this. “But never mention Nicole or what happened. Ever.”
Gerard smiled and nodded his head.
“Thank you,” he said. He leaned forward and kissed me softly. “I love you, Amanda”
“I love you too.”
The End
I took a deep breath and got out of my car, the cold November air hitting my exposed legs. I straightened the black skirt I was wearing and pulled my jacket tightly around my body as I started toward the funeral. I was almost there when I saw him. I stopped walking and stared at him. It had been 8 years since I had seen him, but he still looked the same. His ebony hair was longer, but he still looked the same.
As if sensing someone staring at him, he looked in my direction and our eyes met. I just stared at him. Then he did something I definitely didn’t expect; he smiled. He smiled! At a funeral. Bastard. I returned his smile with a glare. I didn’t want to be here now. He had the nerve to smile at me after what he had done to me. Him and Nicole. My best friend and my first and only love. It had been 8 bitter years since that day, and it still hurt to think about it. I turned around and closed my eyes tightly to keep the tears I felt coming from escaping. I opened my eyes and started back to my car quickly. As I started to open the car door, a hand shot out from behind me and held the door so I couldn’t open it. I saw the person’s reflection in the window. It was him.
“Go away, Gerard,” I said.
“Amanda,” he said. I could feel his breath on the back of my head. He was standing close behind me.
“Please just leave me alone,” I whispered. I shut my eyes tightly again but a stray tear escaped.
I felt his breath on my ear now.
“I killed her, Amanda,” he whispered, his lips brushing my ear as he spoke. I gasped and opened my eyes that widened with shock and fear. I turned to face him and pressed my back against my car.
“Y-You w-what?” I said, my voice trembling. He reached a hand to my hair and I flinched. He gently stroked my dark brown hair, a soft smile on his lips.
“I killed Nicole,” he said, his eyes never leaving mine.
“W-Why?” I asked. I felt very afraid. I couldn’t picture Gerard actually killing someone, and he had just admitted to doing just that. He admitted to killing my ex-best friend. The person he had cheated on me with.
Gerard stopped stroking my hair and placed a hand on my cheek. The small smile left his lips and he suddenly looked serious.
“I couldn’t forget your face when you saw me with Nicole,” he said. “Everyday for the past 8 years I’ve been tortured with the guilt of hurting you. I had to do something about
it. I always loved you.”
I stared at him in disbelief.
“Liar,” I said. “You’re a liar. If you loved me you wouldn’t have cheated on me. You broke my heart and I haven’t been able to move on. I can’t forget you and I can’t trust anyone.”
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“What the fuck ever,” I said. I pushed him away and quickly got into my car. He just stood back and watched as I started my car and left. I wished I had never come. I drove by a bar and decided to try and have a little bit of fun. Or just drown my sorrow.
~A few hours later~
I stumbled out of the bar. I was drunk. I went to my car and leaned against it, dizzy from all the alcohol I had consumed. I closed my eyes, loving the feeling of the cold air after being in the very warm bar.
“Amanda?” I heard a voice say. I groaned, and opened my eyes. Of course, there stood Gerard. Why couldn’t he just leave me alone?
“Leave me the fuck alone,” I slurred. I stopped leaning on my car and went around to the driver’s side, almost falling in the short distance. I was about to get in when Gerard grabbed my arm and pulled me back.
“I don’t think you should drive,” he said. I ripped my arm angrily from his grasp.
“Fuck off,” I said. I was about to get into my car when I was suddenly overcome with a nauseous feeling in my stomach. I turned around and began throwing up, just missing Gerard’s feet. When I was done my throat burned. I felt like I was going to pass out and then everything went black.
I opened my eyes and groaned. My head was throbbing. I sat up slowly and looked around the unfamiliar bedroom I was in. Where was I?
As if reading my thoughts, a door to my right opened and, unfortunately, Gerard came in. He saw I was awake and smiled. I scowled and took the medicine and water he was offering me.
“How do you feel?” he asked.
Instead of answering him I laid back down and rolled over onto my side so my back faced Gerard. I heard Gerard sigh and felt the bed shift as he sat on it, next to me.
“I never meant to hurt you,” he said. “Sleeping with Nicole was a mistake. When you left, I never got to tell you how sorry I was. I didn’t know how to show you how much you meant to me and how sorry I was.”
“Did you really kill her?” I asked, finally deciding to say something.
“Yes,” he said. “I made it look like an accident so I won’t get caught. I felt that killing her was the only way to show you how important you are to me.”
I sat up and looked at him.
“Why did you even sleep with her in the first place?” I asked.
“I don’t know,” he said. “It just sort of happened. We were both a little drunk and the next think I know I’m with Nicole in my bedroom. By the time I realized what I was doing you had walked in and saw us.”
I didn’t know what to say. I placed my face in my hands. He had killed someone. For me. But he cheated on me. Yet he was drunk so he didn’t have the best judgment..
Did I still love him? Yes.
Could I forgive him? Probably. Everyone makes mistakes. I could be happy again. The past 8 years have been lonely and depressing. I needed to feel loved. And here was someone who loved me. And I loved him. He even killed someone to show his love for me.
I lifted my face out of my hands and looked at Gerard.
“I think I want to give you another chance,” I said; almost not believe I was actually doing this. “But never mention Nicole or what happened. Ever.”
Gerard smiled and nodded his head.
“Thank you,” he said. He leaned forward and kissed me softly. “I love you, Amanda”
“I love you too.”
The End
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