Why So Serious?

Harley watched as Joker’s men were putting together bombs they would be using in the near future. “Where did all the men that robbed the bank with him go?” she questioned one of them. “Shouldn’t he be worried they’ll squeal?”

The man erupted into laughter. “Sweetie, he killed them all. Every single one.” He looked at her. “Less shares,” he said with a wink.

Harley’s eyes widened. “Oh.”

She climbed to her feet and walked aimlessly around the maze of a warehouse she was in. A lot of thoughts were streaming through her head, but one always seemed to be more important than the others. Was Joker going to kill her? Or, better yet, would she care if he did? Her little adventure led her to a doorframe that actually had a door attached, with light coming through the cracks in it and from under the door. She opened the door and walked into the room, the contents of the room were that of only four things. A desk, a chair, a lamp, and the Joker. He turned around and faced her as she entered.

“Well, now you’ve found my office!” he told her. “Congratulations.”

Harley stared at him. “I have a question to ask you.”

“Okay, shoot,” he said, then giggled slightly.

“Are you going to kill me?” she blurted out.

He grinned and rose from his chair, walking over to him. He brushed his hand against her cheek. “You’re too pretty to kill, gorgeous.”

Harley blinked. “Really?”

“Do I look like the person who would lie to you? I’m a man of my word. Speaking of which, I have something to attend to. Here,” he said, placing bills into her hand. They were hundred dollar bills, Harley’s eyes widened. “Go buy yourself some clothes, I doubt you’ll be leaving anytime soon, I find you too much fun. Now I am almost absolutely positive there’s an exit around here somewhere. Find it and go shop, I guess. But be back… Oh, you better come back.” With that he traced his index finger along her bottom lip and left the room.

Harley eventually found her way out of the warehouse and made her way to downtown Gotham in her dirty clothes. She entered a clothing store called Express and made her way to the racks of dresses against the wall, ignoring the critical eyes on her. She overheard a pair of women older than her talking about the Joker.

“Honestly, he scares me to death. I’m afraid to let my kids out of the Goddamn house!” said one.

“I know how you feel Jane, he is such a freak. They need to get him caught, and fast.”

Harley felt a spark of anger and pulled a few black dresses of the rack, making her way to the back of the store to look at shoes, bumping into the women as hard as she could.

“Excuse you,” said the women known as ‘Jane’. “God, what trash,” she mumbled to her companion. Harley whirled around.

“No bitch, excuse you. I’m sorry the trash and the freaks are dirtying up your wholesome streets,” Harley yelled at her. She grabbed a black sleeveless vest off of a rack and approached the sales clerk. “Excuse me ma’am, may I try these items on?” she asked her, flashing her best smile.

A handful of stores and three shopping bags full of clothes later, Harley was standing in front of the now all familiar warehouse. She was glad when the old building came in sight. She pulled open the door and stepped inside, making sure to close the door before she continued in. A figure emerged from the shadow of a doorway.

“I see you had no trouble spending my money,” the Joker said.

“You mean the money you worked so hard for?” Harley said with a grin. “Where can I put all of this shit?”

Joker stepped behind her and put one hand on either side of her hips, guiding her to a room. “Open it.”

She did as she was told and squealed in delight at what she saw. It was a room complete with a queen bed with a striped comforter on it, beside it was a nightstand and a desk with a mirror was on the opposite wall.

“It’s that exciting?”

She shook her head and walked deeper into her room. “No, you don’t understand. I haven’t slept in a room by myself in three years.”

The Joker coughed. “Well now you can.”

Harley smiled and placed her bags on the bed, then turned and walked casually over to the Joker. She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him lightly on his bright red mouth. “You’re not as nearly as evil as you look,” she said with a grin.

“We’ll see,” he responded.