To Find a Little Piece of Heaven You Must First Go Through Hell

It was now 5:00 and Matt and I were sitting down at the table eating bologna sandwiches. “I haven’t had one of these since about 4 years ago” I said. “We eat them all the time” he said. I kept thinking about Coby, and I looked down at the table to concentrate better. “Look Bells, don’t take it out on yourself. Coby loves you” he said. “He told me to get out of his life. If that’s love, then he sure has an f-ed up way of showing it” I said. “Deep down he loves you” said Matt. “He obviously loves that hooker more” I said. I sighed again and took a sip of grape juice. “This was fun today Matt, just you and me” I said. “Get used to it – we have 13 more days or so of it” he said. I laughed and he smiled at me again. I liked Matt’s smile, but it was nowhere near Zacky’s. “Michelle’s coming over tomorrow night” said Matt. “I’ve never met her” I said. “She’s something else. You think that Coby’s woman’s a slut? Wait and see Michelle” he said. We both laughed at that, and then finished eating in silence. “So, where did you go for two weeks?” he asked. “Los Angeles, to visit my friend Jessica and her husband Chris. Chris is a friend of my brother’s” I said. “Oh, I see” he said. He stood up and put his dishes in the sink, and then took mine. I stood up and we went into the living room. “Want to watch another movie?” he asked. “Sure, you can pick this time” I said. He stood there thinking for a couple of minutes and then nodded. “How about Silent Hill?” he asked. I had never heard of that one. “Okay” I said. I sat back down on the couch and Matt popped in the DVD. “Get ready for this one” he said smugly. He sat down next to me and pressed play.
*2and a half hours later*
I was extremely freaked out. When Zacky, Synyster, Johnny and Rev came in the door I screamed and jumped (I was already sitting on Matt’s lap). “Awe Matt, you didn’t let her watch Silent Hill did you?” Brian asked. “Yeah” he said. The four other guys shook their heads. “Bella, are you going to be alright?” Zacky asked as he scooped me up into his arms. “I don’t know” I said blankly. He smiled at me and then I kissed him lightly. “Better?” he asked. I nodded and he started walking up the steps. “We already ate, so let’s get you upstairs and we can talk” he said. I nodded again and he made a turn down the hallway to his bedroom.
*back downstairs*
“Any news?” Matt asked Rev as they all sat down at the kitchen table. “Gena’s back in town” said Rev. “Poor Bells” said Brian. “We all know that Zacky will be back to Gena in no time” said Johnny. “What happens when Bella and he break up? We can’t just throw her out on the streets” said Matt. “Look Matt, we all know that you’ve liked her for a while now. She can stay with you. Be there for her, and she’ll see which member of our band she was actually meant to be with” said Brian. “And tension between me and Zacky?” Matt asked. “He’ll get over it” said the Rev. “You guys must have thought this through” said Matt. “Yeah, we did” said Brian. The four guys laughed and continued to talk.
*2 weeks later*
The past two weeks Zacky hadn't been as lovey-dovey towards me. I would be lucky if I ever got a kiss goodnight. The guys all keep talking about this girl, Gena, who just came back to Huntington. Who is this Gena, why is she back in town, and WHAT does she want with Zacky?
*upstairs with Zacky and Bella*
“Well, my ex-girlfriend is back in town” said Zacky. “Oh” I said, “Did you love her?” “Yeah, still do” he said. I felt like my heart just came up into my throat and was trying to choke me. “I understand if you want to go back to her” I said. “You do?” he asked. “Yeah, I guess so” I said. He picked my chin up with his hand so that I had to look at him. “Look, I love Gena, and I don’t want to put you through hell and back with me pretending that I don’t. But this doesn’t mean that I don’t like you – I always kind of will” he said. I wanted to cry, but his smiled refused me. “I love you Bella, just not as much as Gena. I’m really sorry” he said. I nodded and he kissed me one more time. I pulled away and walked out of the room – biting my lip so that I wouldn’t cry. I walked downstairs and sat on the couch between Brian and the Rev. “Hi Bella, where’s Zacky?” asked Rev. “Upstairs, probably calling Gena” I said bitterly. Rev looked over at Matt and the other guys and then back to me. “Did he...dump you?” asked Brian. Rev gave him a menacing look and he returned an” I didn’t mean to” look. I then started crying into Rev’s shoulder. He patted my back and motioned for Matt to come over and sit next to me. I then switched from Rev to Matt, and he put me over his shoulder and stood up. “”You’ll be sleeping in Matt’s room tonight” said Brian. Matt carried me up the stairs and down the hall and went into the last door on the right He sat me down on the bed and I looked around – the room was more dark and moody then Zacky’s. It had Megadeth, Iron Maiden and Guns ‘N Roses posters up all over and dark wooded furniture. “I like your room” I managed to say between sobs. “I suppose I could say get used to it” he said. I rubbed my eyes and lied back. He started stripping down into his boxers and I couldn’t help checking him out – after all, I sort of did have a huge crush on him. He threw me a pair of his boxers and a Harley-Davidson shirt and I gave him a confused look. “I’m not going to make go walk into Zacky’s room to get your clothes” he said. I nodded, sniffled again, and then walked into his bathroom. A few minutes later, I came out and he was in his bed with a notebook writing down stuff. I sat down on the other side of the bed and he looked up. “Are you ok?” he asked. I shrugged and looked down at the blanket on the bed – it was black. Then Matt’s phone went off and he flipped it open.
It was a text from the Rev
“Make a move already!”
He shrugged at it and put his phone on the nightstand, and then tugged on my arm like a five year old. “What?” I asked, laughing a little. He tugged again and I came falling on top of him. “That’s what I wanted” he said. He started stroking my hair again and I let out a deep sigh. “Zacky’s just a jerk Bells” he said. “Yeah, I know” I said. I looked up at him and his eyes met mine. “I’m sorry” he said. I gave him a little smile and then adjusted my body so that my upper body was on his and my lower body was on the bed. “Is this ok?” he asked. I nodded and he started playing with my hair. “Sorry, I’m just kind of bored” he said. I nodded, and then moved my body again so that my head could rest on his shoulder and the rest of my body was on the bed. “Tired?” he asked. I yawned and he laughed. “I’ll take that as a yes” he said. I cuddled up to him closer as he shut the light off and then he wrapped his arms around me. “Goodnight Bella” he said. “Goodnight” I said. I knew that I could get used to this.