The Hidden Truth

A day later I was woke up to a knock on the door of my room. I was pulled out of a good dream, one that I was highly interested in and did not want it to end without know how the dream would turn out. I sleepily made my way to the door and pressed the green button to access the door. A woman, one I did not recognize, greeted me and handed me a data pad. I took a second to examine the strange piece of technology. I read the word on the small screen and froze. I was to report to the council chamber in an hour.

Later, I found myself sweating like never before. I was shaking, my bones rattling, and unable to keep still. My legs nervously paced my body in a small line back and forth. My mind was mostly frozen in panic, except for the part that was crying and begging me to go back to my room and hide beneath the warm, safe blankets. My hair was a soaked mess and I could imagine what my face looked like. My mouth was dry, but I had no want for water. I tried to breathe, but my chest was constricted by my fear. I could not let go of my desperate, paralyzing fear.

I was terrified of standing before the council. I was out of my mind with fear just standing, near the door to the chamber. What had I done? I had to be in trouble. It must have been Master Mirmo. He told them of my secret. He told them I had hide my past training, I had held back information. I had broken the rules. Why did he do this? What had I done? Was it because I could not feel the Force when he asked me the first time? From what my senses told me, he wasn’t that anger over that. I could not understand the logic of this possible option. I tried a different route of reasoning why I was here. Maybe I had done something right. Maybe the council wanted me to do something. Just maybe, I was going to be rewarded. I couldn’t explain that either. My mind returned back to the idea of being in trouble. Gosh, I would pay millions to get out this hallway. I could not even realistically think of myself walking through that door to a group of well trained Jedi, who all could read my mind. I hated the idea that Jedi could read me. Yes, I could read them, but I didn’t want anyone to be able to do the same with me. I could not create a shield to protect my thoughts for that would have been considered rude and then they would question why I was trying to hide. I could not show them this terror, but I could not get rid of it. Why was I waiting here? Couldn’t they just stop terrorizing me and just get this horrible event over with?

The door on the other side of the hall opened. I jumped a food in pure surprise and agitation. What was he doing here? Master Mirmo walked in, looking calm and cool as he always done. I swear the man is in love with meditation, for he must spend his whole life sitting on some cold hard floor and not thinking. ARG! How could he be so calm when so close to the awe inspiring presence of the council? We made eye contact and I swear he was about to start laughing at me. I want to do something to him, something to wipe that smiling because I’m an emotional mess off his face. I was also angry at him because he must of told the council of all this. He broke the secret, ruined what little trust I had for him. He came up to me and put a comforting hand on my shoulder.

“Relax Karen. This isn’t your death sentence”

He was wasting breath with me. I wasn’t going to calm down. I couldn’t calm down. I started shaking even worse. Every last bit of nerves and courage fell through.

“Stop shaking and control yourself. There is nothing to fear. Breathe and let go.”
I was so desperate to stop being scared that I tried to follow his advice. I took a deep, calming breath, held it, and slowly let it out. I gathered my fear, my panic, with the next breath and tried to send to the floor. A tiniest bit of my gripping dread left, but returned again with the next breath. I took another breath, fighting to urge to look at the time. I was half way done breathing in when the door to the council room side open. My breath quickly left my lungs as my heart just about stopped. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t think. I couldn’t go in. I couldn’t face what was in there.

“Come Karen. Let’s not keep the council waiting.”

I still wouldn’t move. I couldn’t move.

“Karen, this is an order. You must come”

That woke me enough out of my fear to follow him. I went into a mindless, unaware state as I walked into the room. The room was quite simple. There were eight simple chairs in a semi circle, with a Jedi sitting in each on. There were a few high, small windows that gave light and life to the room, but couldn’t distract me. The walls were plain and blank, giving no hint to the pure raw power in the room. The air seemed to glow or vibrate or both in the Force. You could easily get distracted and lost with the Force here. The feeling of such power struck you in the face like the gust of a powerful wind. Even non Force sensitive must have vaguely, without reason, picked up the feeling of strength and power. The members of council were impressive. While I didn’t know anyone, but one, I could tell without trying, these were well trained and extremely smart people. The one was Luke Skywalker. He didn’t know that I knew him. He didn’t know everything I knew about him. I saw a boyish look still left in his eyes. He was older, broader, and more mature than I remember him being, or as in my book knowledge of him, but he still was Luke, the farm boy, thrown into a chaos of superior actions.

“Knight Mirmo, student Karen, thank you for coming”

Some woman, next to Luke had said that. I didn’t really look at her, in fear that I would start unconsciously reading her. There was a moment of silence before she continued.

“Knight Mirmo, you came before us today because you had something to discuss about?”

I gave the quickest of glances to Mirmo, wondering what on earth was going on. I thought he had told the council my secret already and I was here to confirm it. Apparently, he wanted to publicly embarrass me before the entire council.

“Yes I do. It is about Karen. She has been with my meditation class for a week. At first I thought she was just like the rest of the students, a beginner at meditation and the Jedi way. I was proven wrong when one day I was able to witness her display of knowledge in the Force. She was dancing to music in one of the lightsaber classrooms, with the training blocks left out. She was dancing around the blocks, never touching them, and never looking for them. I sensed the Force within her and how she used it to sense the blocks. She kept this display up for several minutes, until the song ended. Although she tried to deny any such talent, I had her prove it to me with another dance, and I had moved the blocks around behind her back. She repeated the same level of Force control.

On the first day the students were taught how to feel the Force, she already knew how and with some prodding from me, she showed me a deeper understanding of the Force. It is clear to me, that Karen has had training from her home world. She claims that she wished to keep her past training a secret in order to start anew. While I feel this deserves merit and maturity, I feel she shows great potential and could be a great knight with the help of a guiding hand. I request that I be allowed to take her as my apprentice.”

The room was silent again for a moment. The council members looked at each other, careful to not reveal anything to me. Finally, Luke grabbed my attention and stared right into my soul and directed his words to me only.

“Do you accept Karen?”

Accept? How could I accept? How could I even think about this! This was insane. Master Mirmo must have been out of his mind. I had been here for only a week and he was asking to take me as an apprentice. He barely knew me and I the same to him. There was no way for him to know if this would work or not. He was embarrassing himself as well as me, rushing into this. I looked up at him, questioning him. He looked back, but gave no answer. The choice was purely mine. I quieted myself, turned inward and to the Force. What was my future? What was my path, my destiny? Usually I forbid myself to go looking into the future because I usually saw horrible things, but this was different and far more important. The Force would not hint my future clearly enough to help me see where this path would take me, but I could feel enough that I was to accept this offer. It was the right thing to do, even if it was highly out of taste.

I told the council my decision.

“Then, Master Mirmo, the council grants you the permission to take Karen Nightingstar as your apprentice. May the Force be with both of you.”

Master Mirmo nodded and bowed. I felt a touch in the Force from him, telling me to follow his example and I bowed. Master Mirmo turned and walked out of the council. I felt uncomfortable with showing my back to such people, but there no way to help this.

When we walked out of the chamber, past the hallway, and to the direction of the lift, known to me as an elevator, I busted out what I was thinking. I wanted to know what he was thinking. Was he aware of how long I had been here. Why did he want to take me? Weren’t there better, more promising students out there? Before I could keep bombarding him with questions, he held up his hand and I fell silence.

“Is this how to talk to your newly assigned Master?”
I steamily told him that I wasn’t assigned, that he took me without giving me warning.

“I gave you enough warning of such a possibility. Why do you think I spent so much time with you during the classes?”

I told him he was just trying to get back at me for keeping a secret. I ranted more, demanding why he had to ruin my secret.

“You told me this secret. You gave me information that, as a knight, I felt I must pass on to the council. As for the time spent on you during classes, my naïve apprentice, I only spend time with those who are worthy of my time. You showed great promise and skill to me during the evening of the dance. It was clear you could do more, and wanted to. I was merely giving you the chance to show off. Instead, you fought me, thinking I was trying to put you at a disadvantage. Remember, not everyone is against you.”

I had nothing to say. My emotions were too flared up. I was so happy to gain such attention. I was proud that he saw me of someone that was worth his time. I was annoyed that I could not continue my plan, but at the same time I was relieved that I was no longer living a lie.

“Go to your room, Karen, and meditate to clear your mind. You are free from classes for today. I will notify the teachers of this.”

I did as ask and found myself extremely tired when I sat on my bed. I curled up into a ball and continued the dream I had before all this started.