The Hidden Truth

The Knight

Lunch was another companionless meal, with this time a bit of loneliness entered my heart. Even if I despise most people, I still have to be around them. I still feel the need, the craving to be accepted, to be loved, to belong. To stand out alone, to be a loner, is a rough, tired path that even a Jedi feels the difficulty. I was tempted to move my tray to a table full of laughing, animated people, but I held back. I did not know anyone of them and I would intrude where I shouldn’t. I would have to find the strength within for the right time to make my move.

After lunch, I wondered the endless halls to finally locate my next class. From what I had been told, this class would be about general Jediism. This description didn’t tell me much, but got my interest all the same. The classroom was similar to the last one, but this time there were no chairs and the floor was matted with some type of semi hard foam. I was starting to get the idea, the temple did not spend much time decorating classrooms, or hinting what the room may be for. The other difference in the room was the size of the class and the people of the class. I’m not sure how I knew this, perhaps my Force sense told me, but I had a strong feeling I was with the newest of the Jedi students. There was something in the way they nervously stood, the confused, unsure looks on their faces, and the vague topics of the conversations being told. I relaxed a few hairs, knowing whatever happened; I could not do worse than them.

The teacher, or should I say master, came in and once again the room fell silence, all eyes and senses where on the lone man. He had a very soft voice, a quiet demeanor, and flowing moves. He was middle height, lean, muscular, brown eyes with dark brown hair. There was something about him that made me tense up and want to relax at the same time. I felt a connection to him, and I knew well it was not love of any sort. He seemed to bring out a strong desire in me to give him my full respect. This was a man that showed intelligence and a grace I sorely lacked. He was a man of character, one I would like to dive deeper into his mind. It was all I could do to remind myself I was not suppose to have that ability, and had to drag my mind off that topic.

He invited us to sit down, and only after he started lowering himself to the floor, did the students follow him. This class of students was much unsure of the way things were done and made me feel a bit better about my own insecurity. He started talking about the Jedi way, giving us a taste of the philosophy, the rules, the reasons, and the ideas that centered in the life of a Jedi. He cleared fantasy, myths, and rumors that anyone off the street would have about Jedi. I appreciated him doing this, after spending my time explaining these points to countless people. He gave us warnings and a clear picture of what would come in the future. He mentioned the dark side; bring a sharp pain to my heart. The dark side was a subject I knew all too well, a subject I came here to fight alone. He went on to say how each of us will have to recognize and face down our fears. I was not looking forward to mine, but knew all too well it was coming.

He smoothly changed the dark, depressing topic to one of a lighter side: exercise. Part of our training would become physically in shape. I look a quick look around to notice the fact most of us were overweight and probably could run no faster than I could. I had a second of fear of being made to exercise heavily, showing one of my weaknesses, but that was quickly calm when he said we would just do stretches. I could stretch; in fact I liked to stretch. I have a small bit of pride that I am more flexible than most girls and give me a month of twice a day stretching and I can sit down into splits without any pain. He led us through various stretches that included my arms, back, thighs, calves, and shoulders. He encouraged us to remain calm and to blank out our minds as we moved. The class, at the end, seemed to be surer of themselves, less fearful of their surroundings, and seemed closer to each other. I came to the conclusion these sort of classes is what brings such a sensation of total tranquility and unity.

I headed back to my room, this time not getting as lost as I had been, for a quick shower. I have always loved being around hot water. The spray on my back felt so good and getting the sweat out of my hair from the exercise made me wake up. The day had started out badly, but seemed to be getting better and steadier as time went on. Another soft chime could be heard from an unseen source, telling me it was time for dinner. Dinner was another lonely meal and I felt the need for friendship even more, but I still was not ready to overcome my shyness. My evening was quickly spent by further exploring the strange computer and retiring to bed early.

I had forgotten to clear and calm my mind before I fell asleep. I had forgotten due to the feeling of overconfidence in my good feeling. The day had strengthened the inner part of me, fooling me into thinking I was now immune to the nightmares. A nightmare did occur, ruining my chance for a good sleep, but it was not the same fear filling quality as the last one, but still focused on the terrifying figure of my father had imprinted on my soul.