Frozen
It tears me apart that you will never know
I just watched her sitting there… she was always sitting there, taking little flowers and braiding them into her own hair. She was now like a little girl, amazed by the most little thing. But sometimes those vacant eyes would stare into nothingness for hours and I couldn’t do anything but watch.
I don’t even know if she recognizes me anymore. Sometimes I think she does… when I see like a little glimpse of light in her eyes when I come to her, but it always vanishes so fast that I‘ve come to believe I imagine those. She smiles to me as well, bet then she smiles to everything around here when she’s in a good mood. Sometimes, when she’s not, she just curls into a ball and sobs quietly, even making her own palms bleed from digging her nails so hard into them. I try to take her hands, but she pushes me away and screams.
I can't feel my senses
I just feel the cold
All colors seem to fade away
I can't reach my soul
She was so different before. She’d smile to me and I could feel my heart melting in a second. Happy giggles, sexy smiles, honest laughs… Her eyes would shine and I knew it was for me. The day we got married was the happiest day of my life and so was hers. I can still remember the white creamy silk molding her perfect body, the little tiara on her head, her elf-like braided red hair and the red roses bucket on her hands. I can feel my eyes tearing up at that sight.
The day she came and told me she was pregnant… I was speechless… I just fell to my knees and cried holding her legs. She patted my head smiling down at me, shining down on me… We thought life would be always perfect, that we’d have each other forever, happily ever after.
3 kids and a car accident later we realized that wasn’t true.
Tell me I'm frozen
But what can I do?
Can't tell the reasons
I did it for you
Her once glowing face was now pale and tired, like the infinite tears she cried tore her cheeks, marking her forever like scars for everyone to see. And I was left to watch her consume. I always thought she was the stronger of us: so proud, so tall, standing up so high that nothing could ever hurt her. She was always the calm between every storm. She gave me sense and direction… I could be standing in the dark, and she would find me and lead me back to her. And I couldn’t do that for her now.
I felt so guilty and powerless… Like it was me who should have taken the fall, being forced to be trapped inside my mind. Not her, when she was so perfect… But fate had decided to make her take the fall and slammed her onto the floor, into the darkness where I couldn’t find her, where I couldn’t rescue her. I called her name so many times it begun to lose its meaning.
I can feel your sorrow
You won't forgive me
But I know you'll be alright
It tears me apart that you will never know
But I have to let go
I could kiss her, but she wouldn’t respond to me. Once she would respond hungrily, tenderly, softly or wildly. Then, she would straddle me, setting her hair loose and letting me dive and that red sea that flowed through her back. Now she just would stare at whatever was beyond me and touch her lips like trying to remember… My face always lit up in those moments and my heart skipped a beat, but it was just a temporary illusion that would fade away in a blink. She’d be back to braiding flowers…
I should have gotten away, some people told me. But I couldn’t. I love her too much to just leave her. She’s on my mind all the time, smiling to me, like saying that there’s a chance, whispering me in my dreams that she’s still there and she still loves me, even when her body doesn’t show it. She keeps asking me to hang in there cause she will come out and we’ll be happy again. Like we should have been from the beginning. So I sit beside her everyday, waiting for her to come… if it isn’t today, then it will be tomorrow… But I know she will.
Everything will slip away
Shattered pieces will remain
When memories fade into emptiness
Only time will tell its tale
If it all has been in vain
Mikey stared at Ariel as the sun begun to set, sending orange rays through the trees. It was almost time for the visit to be over. He reached her face and caressed it tenderly, even when she seemed oblivious to his actions. Suddenly, Ariel stared at him.
“I’m going for today, honey. I will see you tomorrow, okay?” Mikey kissed her forehead. “Happy anniversary.” He turned away and just started to walk to his car slowly, feeling the tears fill up his eyes. Something made him stop, like a soft breeze, telling him to turn around…
“Mikey?”
I don’t even know if she recognizes me anymore. Sometimes I think she does… when I see like a little glimpse of light in her eyes when I come to her, but it always vanishes so fast that I‘ve come to believe I imagine those. She smiles to me as well, bet then she smiles to everything around here when she’s in a good mood. Sometimes, when she’s not, she just curls into a ball and sobs quietly, even making her own palms bleed from digging her nails so hard into them. I try to take her hands, but she pushes me away and screams.
I can't feel my senses
I just feel the cold
All colors seem to fade away
I can't reach my soul
She was so different before. She’d smile to me and I could feel my heart melting in a second. Happy giggles, sexy smiles, honest laughs… Her eyes would shine and I knew it was for me. The day we got married was the happiest day of my life and so was hers. I can still remember the white creamy silk molding her perfect body, the little tiara on her head, her elf-like braided red hair and the red roses bucket on her hands. I can feel my eyes tearing up at that sight.
The day she came and told me she was pregnant… I was speechless… I just fell to my knees and cried holding her legs. She patted my head smiling down at me, shining down on me… We thought life would be always perfect, that we’d have each other forever, happily ever after.
3 kids and a car accident later we realized that wasn’t true.
Tell me I'm frozen
But what can I do?
Can't tell the reasons
I did it for you
Her once glowing face was now pale and tired, like the infinite tears she cried tore her cheeks, marking her forever like scars for everyone to see. And I was left to watch her consume. I always thought she was the stronger of us: so proud, so tall, standing up so high that nothing could ever hurt her. She was always the calm between every storm. She gave me sense and direction… I could be standing in the dark, and she would find me and lead me back to her. And I couldn’t do that for her now.
I felt so guilty and powerless… Like it was me who should have taken the fall, being forced to be trapped inside my mind. Not her, when she was so perfect… But fate had decided to make her take the fall and slammed her onto the floor, into the darkness where I couldn’t find her, where I couldn’t rescue her. I called her name so many times it begun to lose its meaning.
I can feel your sorrow
You won't forgive me
But I know you'll be alright
It tears me apart that you will never know
But I have to let go
I could kiss her, but she wouldn’t respond to me. Once she would respond hungrily, tenderly, softly or wildly. Then, she would straddle me, setting her hair loose and letting me dive and that red sea that flowed through her back. Now she just would stare at whatever was beyond me and touch her lips like trying to remember… My face always lit up in those moments and my heart skipped a beat, but it was just a temporary illusion that would fade away in a blink. She’d be back to braiding flowers…
I should have gotten away, some people told me. But I couldn’t. I love her too much to just leave her. She’s on my mind all the time, smiling to me, like saying that there’s a chance, whispering me in my dreams that she’s still there and she still loves me, even when her body doesn’t show it. She keeps asking me to hang in there cause she will come out and we’ll be happy again. Like we should have been from the beginning. So I sit beside her everyday, waiting for her to come… if it isn’t today, then it will be tomorrow… But I know she will.
Everything will slip away
Shattered pieces will remain
When memories fade into emptiness
Only time will tell its tale
If it all has been in vain
Mikey stared at Ariel as the sun begun to set, sending orange rays through the trees. It was almost time for the visit to be over. He reached her face and caressed it tenderly, even when she seemed oblivious to his actions. Suddenly, Ariel stared at him.
“I’m going for today, honey. I will see you tomorrow, okay?” Mikey kissed her forehead. “Happy anniversary.” He turned away and just started to walk to his car slowly, feeling the tears fill up his eyes. Something made him stop, like a soft breeze, telling him to turn around…
“Mikey?”