Little Red Cinderella and the Three Beanstalks

Previously...

"Well, since I'm the one asking you to transform her back, aren't you still using my magic for me?" I asked, desperately hoping for a loophole.

"No!" The fairy spat, then paused, looking slightly uncertain. "Well, I don't think so... Maybe? I'm not entirely sure the handbook covers this sort of situation... where is the girl, anywhos? Which pumpkin is she exactly?"

"Erm..." Another glance at Ezu, who reflected my blank look right back at me. "We don't exactly know," I admitted, quietly.

"...You don't know?" The fairy looked from each of us incredulously.

"Well, she's here... somewhere!" I defended quickly, without any real conviction. "One of these pumpkins is her, at any rate."

"...There are about a hundred pumpkins here." The fairy said, flatly.

"Well that's not my fault, is it?!" I snapped heatedly.

"Goodness gracious." The woman closed her eyes and shook her gray-haired head, as if she couldn't fathom what the world was coming to these days. "How in the world did this happen anyways?"

"I told you, her step mother accidently did it." I replied, still annoyed.

"Her step mother?" The fairy repeated, looking up at me suddenly.

"Yeah," I said, looking curiously back at her. She was staring at me intently, her lips purpsed. I could practically see the cogs working in her brain as she thought."

"...Well," She said after a moment, "There may not be anything I can do, but I think I might have an idea... that is, if you untie me first."

***************************************************************

Cue James Bond Music

Three figures darted through the night, little more than pieces of the shadowy darkness come alive. They slunk from tree to tree, and when the trees ended, from house to house and lamp post to lamp post as they slid silent and unseen towards their goal.

Well, maybe I'm romanticizing it a little. Ezu, Jack, and I were really just sort of slinking though the empty streets of the towns like three guilty people about to do something they shouldn't, jumping at every noise and glancing conspicuously over our shoulders every couple of minutes.

Not that we needed to be so nervous; there wasn't anyone out. Like, at all. I mean, I wasn't exactly expecting for their to be a parade or something, it WAS the middle of th night, but every house we passed was darkened and empty, and the only living creature apart form ourselves we saw was a stray cat eating something else that may or may not have ever been alive.

"It's eerie out here," I whispered to Ezu, looking around nervously. Deserted villages are exactly the sort of places people like Jason Voorhees like to kill attractive teenagers.

"Why are you whispering?" Ezu whispered back in his usual offensive manner.

"Jason Voorhees," I replied in an even lower tone.

"Oh, of course!" Ezu whispered sarcastically.

"I suppose everyone must be at the ball," Jack said aloud in a normal tone, almost scaring me out of my skin.

"Oh really? And how'd you work that one out?" Ezu asked, equally as snide to Jack as he had been to me.

"That might make it easier for us. If everyone in the entire town has been invited, then we can just say we were late. No guest list either, hopefully."

"Well, that sounds a lot easier than sneaking in," I said hopefully. "This might actually turn out to not be a disaster this time."

"I give it twenty minutes." Ezu growled sourly.

He was in a bad mood. I didn't really blame him, but he was kind of putting a damper on my spirits, so I smacked him in the back of his head.

He gave a yelp of pain, and angrily reached out to smack me back. I jumped out of his reach and wagged a dissapproving finger at him.

[REDACTED]

The Fairy Godmother's plan was simple but effective, something we probably would have thought up ourselves had we been given a little more time. However, we wouldn't have ee able to pull it off quite so well without her help.

A wave of her adorable little wand was all it took to completely whisk away the weeks of grime and dirt that had accumulated on us, and let me tell you, I felt better than I had in... in well, weeks. Another pinch of magic, and suddenly the three of us were ready to attend the Prince's Ball. I felt a little like a birthday cake in my slightly ridiculously, poofy pink gown, but Alfred assured me it was the style of the season and I would blend in perfectly.

[REDACTED (it is explained that the fairy godmother gave the boys dresses to wear so they could sneak into the ball as women. Again, more using cross-dressing for cheap laughs. God, if only I could go back in time and smack my teenage self upside the head.)]

So here we were, creeping through the darkened, deserted streets, up towards the glowing ball of light that was the castle so we could sneak inside and find the step mother and save Cinderella before the world ended. In drag.

Alfred and the Fairy Godmother were hopefully doing their part, since time was fast running out. Alfred had wanted to come with us, but I explained to him that even if we put him in a dress, people would probably notice he wasn't a real girl, so he stayed behind with the Fairy Godmother. He seemed a little put out, so I promised to donate to his Save the Wolves cause before we set off, and that seemed to cheer him up a bit.

Jack, who had been leading the way, stopped and out an arm, forcing Ezu and me to stumble to a halt as well.

“Alright, here we are,” Jack said, looking up at the impressive marble fortress before us. It was right on the other side of the twelve foot wrought iron fence that encircled the entire grounds, which had an armor clad guard standing attentively at the gates, clutching a spear and looking sort of sad standing out there all alone while behind him, we could just see the warm glow of the ball room through the great castle doors, and the sound of laughter and music floated out towards us.

“Okay, are we ready?” I asked quietly, so the guard couldn't hear, looking from Jack to Ezu and back again.

“As I'll ever be.” Ezu grumbled, tugging the bust of his dress up unhappily.

“Then let's go.”

Jack and I put on big, happy grins, and we walked up to the guard. Ezu didn't bother to smile, and walked with his shoulder hunched.

“Hello!” I said, all smiles and sugar, to the guard who had looked around at us alertly as we approached. “We're here for the party!”

“The party?” The guard repeated through his visor.

“Uh... yes. You know, the ball?” I went on, glancing nervously at Jack.

“Ball?” The guard again repeated, sounding absolutely bewildered.

“Uh...” Jack and I exchanged a look. “Uh... we'll just go right in then...” We slid by the guard, watching him carefully as we did so. He made no move to stop us, simply turning his visored head to follow us as we went.

“Okay then! Have a nice time!” He called, and he gave a metallic wave. I waved back, then turned to give Jack a questioning look. He shrugged.

“Hey, we're in, aren't we?”

“I suppose.”

“And now we can hunt down Mister Prince, eh?” Ezu said as we walked up the front steps of the castle. “I need a drink.” Ezu groaned.

“Once we take care of this, I'll fix your a martini. But right now, we've got a job to do. Either of you see that prince?” I stood on my tip toes to try to look over the other guest's heads, but it was hopeless. Jack however, had a good extra foot on him, and was able to see much more than I could.

“Well, near the middle of the floor there is a mass of women. I would assume he is in the middle of that mass.” Jack offered.

“Which means that is where we have to go. Come on.” I grabbed Jack and Ezu by the wrists and started to drag them across the crowded hall. About half way in, the crowd of people pushing in in where I assumed the Prince was became so dense, that I knew there wasn't any hope for it. We weren't going to be able to get it.

“Dammit!” I hissed under my breath, turning back to the boys. “We won't be able to touch him like this. Any ideas?”

“Not a one,” Ezu supplied helpfully, reaching out and grabbing a glassful of something probably alcoholic from the tray of a passing waiter. I looked to Jack, who just shrugged.

“Well then, I guess-” but I didn't get a chance to say anything else, for at that moment, suddenly to orchestra picked up again, and a great swell of music broke the mass of people apart so suddenly that the wave of moving bodies separated the three of us.

I looked around wildly for the boys, but I couldn't spot them. Instead, someone tapped me on the shoulder and as I turned, a youngish man was standing behind me, bowed slightly at the waist with his hand out.

“May I have this dance?” He asked, in a tone of smooth politeness.

“I... erm...” I stammered, a little taken aback. Now that I looked, I could see that everyone else was partnering up and beginning to dance. Evidently, the “break” had ended.

I didn't really WANT to dance, not with a stranger, and not when I had to find the Prince, and definitely not when I didn't even know what dance was being danced. But I didn't know where Jack or Ezu was, let alone the Prince, and at least dancing meant moving, and that meant getting a better look at both the ballroom and the guests. Besides, I didn't really know how to say “no”.

“Eh... sure...” I finally squeaked, tentatively placing my hand in his. He grabbed it, yanked me close, placed his other hand stiffly on my waist, and began stoically rotating me in circles.

This happened twice more.

Almost immediately after I had finally managed to detach myself from the first man—apparently, you are supposed to dance at least two songs with someone to seem polite but not more than three else you give them the wrong impression—I was accosted by another, who did admittedly dance a little better but whose hands were so sweaty I simply couldn't bear to keep going, and then I found myself being argued over by two young men, until I managed to slip away—right into the waiting hands of a fourth.

“Hello,” He smiled at me, a cool, easy little smile, and looked down at me with bright, dark eyes.

“Oh, hello,” I replied, not very excitedly. I just wanted to find Jack and Ezu and get out of here already.

The man's smile grew slightly, and his pushed his dark, almost black hair back out of his eyes with a white gloved hand. He really was very attractive, now that I looked. “You don't sound very enthusiastic.” He said, his voice low and smooth. “Not having a good time?”

“Oh, no, I'm having a fine time, it's just...” I waved a hand in the air, unsure of what to say. It's just I can't find my two friends who are dressed up as women even though they are men so we can find the prince so we can find the evil step mother so we can save Cinderella so we can save the world and I don't really like dancing anyways? Something told me that wouldn't really go over very well.

But the man seemed to understand the sentiment, and gave a soft little laugh. “I understand. You've been bothered all night by requests from gentlemen for 'just one dance'?”

I gave a relieved little laugh of my own. At least he understood that much. “Exactly. Though I don't know why. There are plenty of other girls here,” I pointed out, waving a hand at the mass of women who stood littered all around the edges of the dance floor, partnerless and looking rather bitter.

A smile tugged the edges of the man's mouth again. “Well, I suppose you're the only one who is saying yes.” He explained.

“What do you mean?” I asked, a little suspiciously.

“Most of the other ladies here have been turning down every gentleman's request for the past three nights. They have eyes for none other than the Prince.” He said, his eyes flashing just a little as he mentioned the Prince. I glanced around again, and this time I noticed all of the lonely women's heads were turned in the same direction. I followed their collective gaze, and saw, in the center of the dance floor, a man in a scarlet, decorative uniform with thick, blonde hair and a handsome face spinning a young woman in circles, who looked as if she was about to pee herself in joy.

“The Prince...” I whispered, my heart rate picking up slightly, and my eyes fixed on the dancing figure.

“Oh please, don't tell me you too are so taken by--” The man before me began,. His expression suddenly turning dark, but I interrupted him, coming to my senses.

“What? No, no! Don't be ridiculous. I'm not here to get hitched with the Prince. Lord, no.” I shuddered a little bit. So far, all of the Princes I had met hadn't exactly been the sort of people I would want to spend my life with.

“Really?” The man asked, brightening considerably. “Please, if it isn't to forward of me to ask, why are you here then?”

“I'm here...” I searched for an appropriate answer, “I'm here to find someone. An old friend. But it doesn't look like they're here.”

“Really? Perhaps I know them. What is their name?” The man asked helpfully.

“I... well, I don't know.”

“...Oh? Well, what do they look like?”

“...I don't know.”

“...What do you know about them?”

“Um... they are women.”

“Most everyone here is a woman.”

“And there are three of them. A mother and two daughters.”

“...I'm sorry. I don't think I can help you.”

“I didn't think you could.” I sighed. Talking with this mysterious, handsome stranger had made me realize how hopeless this task really was. We didn't even know what the Step-Mother looked like.

“Come now, don't look so down,” The man smiled at me, and reached out and placed his fingers under my chin, tilting my head up. “I'm sure you'll find them. But you know what they say, a watched pot never boils. Perhaps you should do something else, to take your mind off the search.”

“Like what?” I asked, raising an eyebrow suspiciously. The man smiled guiltily.

“Ah, but you already know. I can see it in your eyes, you've already guessed me for what I am. I admit it, I did come over here initially to ask you to dance.”

I sighed again, and shrugged. He was right, I wasn't getting anywhere looking for people whose identities were a completely mystery to me, and he was very handsome. “Sure, why not? Since I am your only choice, after all.”

He smiled sweetly, and reached out for my hand. I placed it in his.

“Lovely. My name is Jonathan. Jonathan Cole.” He pulled me close, and I rested my hand on his shoulder as his own wrapped around my waist.

“And I'm Rikki Collins,” I smiled back.

He was a very good dancer.

I was a little intimidated at first, since I'm, well, not, and while I had been able to fake it when dancing with Sweaty McHandsy and Mr. Rigor Mortis, the fact was I didn't actually know this particular dance. My middle school had taught me how to do the hussle and the electric slide, but a Viennese Waltz in ¾ time was beyond me. Lucky for me, Mr. Jonathan Jonathan Cole was damn good at what he did, and led like a pro. He was very forgiving about my stepping on his feet as well, which was nice.

By the time we had danced two dances and were still going strong as we entered the third, I was starting to get the hang of it, and had completely forgotten what I was supposed to be doing. It wasn't until I saw Ezu's angry face flash by as Jonathan and I twirled that I suddenly realized I was in big trouble. I gave a little gasp, slipped, missed a step, and effectively brought Jonathan and I to a screeching halt whilst I tried not to go bottoms up in my unsteady heels.

“Are you all right, Miss Collins?” Jonathan asked concernedly, taking my arm to steady me.

“I... um, yes, yes I just... I just saw someone...” I was looking around wildly for Ezu, but he had vanished into the sea of people again.

“Your... 'old friend'?” Jonathan asked, frowning. He didn't seem happy about being interrupted.

“Um... no. Someone else. But he's gone now.” I turned back to Jonathan, who was giving me a curious look. “Well then. In that case, may we resume?” He asked, holding out his hand for me to take. I started to reach out, then frowned and pulled my hand back a little.

“Actually, I'm sorry, but I really have to-”

“She has somewhere to be.” Came a voice from behind me. I jumped and whirled around, to see Ezu glaring past me, at Jonathan, who stared back, looking more than a little alarmed.

“Miss Collins, do you know this... person?” Jonathan asked, taking a step closer so he stood directly behind me, almost protectively. I understood, Ezu did look a little alarming, with his flashing eyes, his fierce glare, his strong jaw clenched as he bared his grit teeth.

I tried not to giggle.

[REDACTED]
(Ezu gets all jealous that Rikki was dancing with Jonathan, which is messed up anyways since he keeps saying he can't be with her, but now he doesn't want her to be with anyone else either? My only excuse is that when you're 16 and Twilight has just come out (or any one of a thousand YA romances that glorify border-line abusive relationships) shit like that seems appealing. I'd cut all the other abusive crap Rikki and Ezu both do to each other throughout this story, but honestly, that's the kind of stuff I feel compelled to leave in as an example of what NOT to do. Look at how I fucked up, and avoid it. You can have dramatic tension in a romance without one character trying to control, physically or emotionally, another.)

We both turned to see Jack standing there, still in his costume, looking from Ezu to me curiously. “Oh, it doesn't matter. What are you two doing here? You know what, what doesn't matter either. Guess what? I found the Prince!”