A Student/Teacher Relationship

'You worthless piece of shit... Are you happy now?'

He did his best to ignore it. As he stumbled down the sidewalk with his new purchase shoved deep in his pocket and his hand gripped tightly around it accumulating sweat. He didn't know why he bought it. He does know that he's inevitably going to use it before the day ends. The streets were dark and lifeless. The sun would be coming up soon. It would burn him with another day of all this. Another day of his hell.

'Ya can't block me out, Jim. I'm just apart of you as your god damn dick is. That's what you think with, isn't it? Wherever Little Jimmy points, the saint is sure to go--- like to that little whore. You're pathetic...'

JImmy only shook his head. Responding with thoughts of his own would perpetaute conversation, if anyone can call it that. But mostly he doesn't have the energy to. He lost it all taking the beating from Becky. How his face ached from that. He couldn't hit her. That was true, but when she told him to trust her. He just snapped.

'Trust me, Jimmy--Trust me!' It mimicked in a whiny tone. 'The fucking bitch betrayed you. I think it's only fair for you to return the favor. You have the means to.'

"I can't do that... It's wrong." He spoke up.

'No, it's justice. Wrong is what she did to you; going behind your back and freeing that cheap prick, and pummeling you on top of that when all you did was love her?! That is wrong. Giving that damn slut what's coming to her, all justice.'

Down the block, headlights turned onto the street he was walking alongside. A cop car. Not something he needed at the moment or never for that matter. He ducked into an alleyway to avoid police curiosity. The rancid stench of garbage penetrated his nostrils without mercy causing him to gag a bit. A dirty bum of maybe around 40 years slept amongst the rubbish, slumped against one of the surrounding brick walls. Jimmy looked down at him in disgust as he continued alittle farther to be stopped by a chained fence. He sighed, gripping the metal rings and resting his forehead against the cool links, shutting his eyes.

'Awww, someone's down in the dumps. Anything I can do to help?'

Jimmy grinned and turned his back to the fence. "You could leave me alone."

It laughed. 'You know that's impossible or otherwise you'd be a dickless good for nothing. How do you think The Great St. Jimmy came to be? The secretly insubordinate son of a bitch spewing words considered to be modern Poe? I really hate to say it, but it's all me.'

"Why can't this just be over?" He groaned, pressing his back to the opposite wall the hobo snored.

'Oh you want it to be over? Well why didn't you say that to begin with?! Just reach into your pocket and end it. Simple as that.'

Jimmy drew in a deep breath as he took out "The Answer to All of His Problems." A Colt 45 the guy he bought it off of told him. It was dirt cheap, but who cares as long as it goes Bang, Bang. He cradeled the gun in his hands for several minutes reviewing in his head his strike of bad luck hours before.... It didn't encourage him to throw it away.

'Go on and shoot yourself down, Ol' Boy! If not you, a bullet would look absolutely lovely right between her pretty little eyes!' It cackled. It made him shudder.

"Stop it!" He shouted. For a brief moment, Jimmy was actually giving in to what it was saying. He saw Becky shot dead and him behind the smoking gun. It felt good.

"Is someone there?" Jimmy's eyes flicked to the homeless man straightening up from his slumber. He squinted at Jimmy through the lifting darkness. "Hey you, get outta here. This is my alley. Go get your own." The man obviously didn't see the pistol in Jimmy's hands.

'What are you waiting for? An invitation? Put that scum in his place; rotting with his fellow trash.'

"Are you deaf, boy? Get out!" He threw an empty pop can at Jimmy's feet.

'Kill him, you stupid fuck. It'll be fun.'

The man pushed himself off the pavement. "I'll come at you on the count of 4 then your dumb punk ass will be kicked to the street." He threatened.

"I wouldn't be saying such things if I were you." Jimmy said calmly, staring at the way the faint approaching sunlight glistened off the Colt's surface.

"Oh yeah and why?"

"Because of this." Jimmy pointed the gun at him. The man's eyes widened and he recoiled back to the wall.

"Whoa, hey man, I'm sorry. Don't shoot. I'll leave."

"No, you just stay right where you are." He cocked the gun at him with each word. "You won't even feel a thing."

"Oh god-Please man." The bum started to blubber.

'Give me some blood. Give us what we both want. Nobody likes you, everyone left you, just listen to me!'

The man was on his knees now, tears streaking dirt down his cheeks. "Please, please, I don't wanna die!"

'You're no one - You're nothing - Fuck it all!'

"Don't kill me! Please of fucking god don't kill me!"

A pleased grin eased onto Jimmy's face. He's figured it out. "Believe me, you won't feel a thing."

'DO IT - DO IT!'

The next thing Jimmy said wasn't towards the desparate man at gunpoint but to The World.

"I'm St. Jimmy... That's my name." He eyed the trigger in admiration. "And don't you fucking wear it out."

Then in an instant Jimmy turned the Colt on himself, wrapped his lips tightly around the barrel, and squeezed his eyes shut and...... BANG!

Nobody ever said life was fair.