The Obsession
04.
Yes, I remember when Ryan first went to an actual school.. He wasn't afraid of it all and made two new annoying brats--I mean, friends--Spencer and Brendon. Honestly, I cannot stand Brendon. Every time he calls up the house and I answer the phone, the nut case talks to me for hours. Not four or six hours, but more of nine to ten.
He's eleven now and I am stuck on the phone with that son-hogging brat otherwise known as Brendon. Ugh, I want to strangle that kid and make him bleed for taking my beauty away from me.
"Yes, Brendon, you can talk to me again sometime soon, just talk to Ryan, please!" I begged before handing the phone to Ryan.
"He's your problem now, pretty." I muttered whilst he took the phone and began to chat with Brendon.
I was watching my new favorite show Law and Order when Ryan came rushing down the stairs. He looked excited and his smile was gorgeous. He jumped on me, putting me into a hug lock in the process. Carefully (when he guard was down), I placed my hands on his waist and slid them underneath his shirt.
"What is babe?" I asked cooly.
"Dad, can I spend the night at Brendon's place?" he asked with a grin on his beautiful face.
Thus completes series one of 'Questions I Am Dreading to Hear'. We are now entering series two, 'Parties, Sleepovers, and Other Preteen/Teenage Shit'.
"Um, baby, I love you, but this is a bad idea."
The look of dismay on his face kills me instantly.
"W-What do you mean, dad? Did I do something wrong? Was I being bad? Dad, I'm sorry for whatever I did." he said; fear dripping from every syllable that escaped his precious lips.
I smiled a bit to myself at the sudden thought I have just gotten.
"You can go, but only if you do this for me first." I tell him firmly.
"What is it?" he asked with a pinch of excitement in his voice.
"I want you to take a shower in front of me and not tell anybody at all or else you'll never be able to go outside again for as long as you live."
He freezes, then stammers out, "But dad I.. Isn't that.." I roll my eyes and sigh before telling him, "Honey, you're not going to be able to go if you don't do this for me." He seems reluctant at first, but then he gives in. I followed him up the steps and watched as he washed himself shakily.
Beautiful. Perfect. Mine, all mine, and no one else's.
The shower water turns off and he immediately has a towel wrapped around his waist. "D-Dad, do I have to get dressed in front of you?" he asked softly. I think for a moment, then nod.
"Why though? It's creepy."
"Well, then, you won't go to Brendon's.."
"I'll do it!"
He looks sick as he gets dressed in front of me. He looks beautiful in every way. He is beautiful in every way... No, this can't be happening.. I can't be falling in love with him, can I? Or was I in love with him this whole time?
He is dressed right now and is still shaking. I wrap my arms around his small frame. He shakes some more before whispering, "I wish you didn't have to do these creepy things you did over the years..and now."
"Honey, I love you. That's why I do it." I tell him smoothly with a kiss on his forehead.
"But it feels wrong.." he mumbles, "You're my dad; not my boyfriend."
I pull him closer and reflect on where he got this idea from. We went out on dates ever since he was four, we call each other 'baby' and 'babe', and we both love each other very much.. Maybe our relationship extends the lines of 'father-and-son' love and is really 'soul-mates' love.
I have no clue. Right now, I feel a bulge beginning to form in my pants and Ryan's breath on my shirt is beginning to drive me crazy.
"Ryan, do you have what you'll need to spend the night at Brendon's, dearie?" I ask to divert him from the subject.
His face brightens as he nods excitedly. I grin at his cuteness. "Alright, let's go then."
***
4:00 AM and I am awake, masturbating to the sweet memory of seeing my beauty shower before me. 5:00 AM and I am lying in bed, thinking about my relationship with Ryan.
Toss, turn, turn.. Nightmare. Toss, turn, turn, toss, turn, toss.
A normal nightly routine for me when Ryan is not home and in my arms. He's so beautiful.. So damn.. Goddamnit! I have to stop thinking these sexual thoughts about my little baby!
Why, though? Why do I have to be feeling this way? Why are sexual feelings emerging in my mind, spirit, and heart? Why?
Holy shit, I think I am falling in love with Ryan..and not in the parenting way.
No, the 'boyfriend' way.
He's eleven now and I am stuck on the phone with that son-hogging brat otherwise known as Brendon. Ugh, I want to strangle that kid and make him bleed for taking my beauty away from me.
"Yes, Brendon, you can talk to me again sometime soon, just talk to Ryan, please!" I begged before handing the phone to Ryan.
"He's your problem now, pretty." I muttered whilst he took the phone and began to chat with Brendon.
I was watching my new favorite show Law and Order when Ryan came rushing down the stairs. He looked excited and his smile was gorgeous. He jumped on me, putting me into a hug lock in the process. Carefully (when he guard was down), I placed my hands on his waist and slid them underneath his shirt.
"What is babe?" I asked cooly.
"Dad, can I spend the night at Brendon's place?" he asked with a grin on his beautiful face.
Thus completes series one of 'Questions I Am Dreading to Hear'. We are now entering series two, 'Parties, Sleepovers, and Other Preteen/Teenage Shit'.
"Um, baby, I love you, but this is a bad idea."
The look of dismay on his face kills me instantly.
"W-What do you mean, dad? Did I do something wrong? Was I being bad? Dad, I'm sorry for whatever I did." he said; fear dripping from every syllable that escaped his precious lips.
I smiled a bit to myself at the sudden thought I have just gotten.
"You can go, but only if you do this for me first." I tell him firmly.
"What is it?" he asked with a pinch of excitement in his voice.
"I want you to take a shower in front of me and not tell anybody at all or else you'll never be able to go outside again for as long as you live."
He freezes, then stammers out, "But dad I.. Isn't that.." I roll my eyes and sigh before telling him, "Honey, you're not going to be able to go if you don't do this for me." He seems reluctant at first, but then he gives in. I followed him up the steps and watched as he washed himself shakily.
Beautiful. Perfect. Mine, all mine, and no one else's.
The shower water turns off and he immediately has a towel wrapped around his waist. "D-Dad, do I have to get dressed in front of you?" he asked softly. I think for a moment, then nod.
"Why though? It's creepy."
"Well, then, you won't go to Brendon's.."
"I'll do it!"
He looks sick as he gets dressed in front of me. He looks beautiful in every way. He is beautiful in every way... No, this can't be happening.. I can't be falling in love with him, can I? Or was I in love with him this whole time?
He is dressed right now and is still shaking. I wrap my arms around his small frame. He shakes some more before whispering, "I wish you didn't have to do these creepy things you did over the years..and now."
"Honey, I love you. That's why I do it." I tell him smoothly with a kiss on his forehead.
"But it feels wrong.." he mumbles, "You're my dad; not my boyfriend."
I pull him closer and reflect on where he got this idea from. We went out on dates ever since he was four, we call each other 'baby' and 'babe', and we both love each other very much.. Maybe our relationship extends the lines of 'father-and-son' love and is really 'soul-mates' love.
I have no clue. Right now, I feel a bulge beginning to form in my pants and Ryan's breath on my shirt is beginning to drive me crazy.
"Ryan, do you have what you'll need to spend the night at Brendon's, dearie?" I ask to divert him from the subject.
His face brightens as he nods excitedly. I grin at his cuteness. "Alright, let's go then."
***
4:00 AM and I am awake, masturbating to the sweet memory of seeing my beauty shower before me. 5:00 AM and I am lying in bed, thinking about my relationship with Ryan.
Toss, turn, turn.. Nightmare. Toss, turn, turn, toss, turn, toss.
A normal nightly routine for me when Ryan is not home and in my arms. He's so beautiful.. So damn.. Goddamnit! I have to stop thinking these sexual thoughts about my little baby!
Why, though? Why do I have to be feeling this way? Why are sexual feelings emerging in my mind, spirit, and heart? Why?
Holy shit, I think I am falling in love with Ryan..and not in the parenting way.
No, the 'boyfriend' way.