The Obsession

My heart was shattering when he told he didn't love me anymore. And it still is; only faster and harder than ever before. After all the shit I went through for him, after all the pain I suffered alone for him.. No, its just not worth it to me anymore.

I take some more pills and slowly feel my breath escaping me. Slowly feel the tingling sensation of rat poison taking its side effects out on me.

I hold onto him, tears escaping my eyes as a few precious memories flash through my mind..

"Daddy, my tummy hurts.." he groaned in pain, eyes in agony.

I picked him up and kissed his lips before laying him on the bed, "Just lay down now, baby, Daddy will take care of everything.."

I was a good father to him, and oft I felt taken for granted and underappreciated. Yet, I still cannot stop loving him. I can't, and I don't even know why.

I don't even know why I had to abduct my own son. I don't even know what I did to make him so afraid of me.

I stand up and get out a pen along with some paper. After witing out my last words, I walk over to my sleeping beauty and kiss him one final time.

"Goodbye, my angel." I whisper into his ear. Tears are caught in my eyes, but I realize now that the only to make him love me is to die and stay dead.

I take some more of the pills as I drag the dagger across my veins. I fell to the floor and it felt so slow, but in reality was indeed, so fast..almost too fast. And my sight was my angel standing with tears in his eyes screaming, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I love you daddy, I do!"

As I shut my eyes, I felt his arms around me and I said my last words to his face..

"I love you too, my beautiful angel."

Everything then went black and before I knew it, I saw Kaitlyn there with tears in her eyes. I went over to hug her, to kiss her, to tell her how much I missed her, to tell her how I loved her.. But she just turned away.

Things were awkward and silent, then she spake, "How...could you have done this to him?"

I was confused for a moment. I never did anything bad to anyone.

"What are you talking about? I never did anything wrong to-" I was cut off by turning around to face with pure wrath in her eyes.

"You did." she seethed.

"To who?"

"To my son, George!"

I'm confused.

"I never did anything wrong to him."

"Yes you did, you did and I saw it! I saw the way you held him, kissed him, touched him, and raped him! How could you rape your own son, George? How!" The wrath in her eyes remained strong before telling me harshly, "You know George, once one commits a suicide, their soul never leaves this earth. I wish you would have been murdered."

She left me and before I knew it...it was like I was alive again. I was in the room where I had died and Ryan.. Oh! My angel, I am so sorry for everything I have ever done to you! I shouldn't have killed myself because now, I am damned for all eternity to see you and him together!

He didn't hear me. All he did was stay on the phone with the police.

Angel, can you not hear me?

He can't hear me.. It's like I'm invisible.

I see my body lying on the floor, I see my son crying on the phone over his rape and abduction..not my death.. It is then that I see that I have died a happy man. For indeed, he may hate me, but I love him. And I always will. I put my life into loving him..and I shall put my eternity into doing the one thing that can make him happy. And that, my friends, is leaving.