Kiss My Textbook

There was only a week left until Gerard graduated and I hadn’t spoken to him since his birthday. I was sitting alone in my room on that Friday night thinking about how handsome Gerard was going to look in his cap and gown. I would be waiting for him at the end of the stage while he received his diploma. Then when he came down from the stage I would run up to him and give the most passionate kiss I could give and hold him tight.

“I’m turning soft,” I said to my room. Flashes of Gerard being with me danced through my mind. We looked so happy together and so much in love it was unbelievable. In love? What is love? I quickly rose from my bed and grabbed my dictionary from the floor. “Let’s see what Webster’s says.”

1love
Pronunciation: \ˈləv\
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English lufu; akin to Old High German luba love, Old English lēof dear, Latin lubēre, libēre to please
Date: before 12th century
1 a (1): strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties <maternal love for a child> (2): attraction based on sexual desire: affection and tenderness felt by lovers (3): affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests <love for his old schoolmates> b: an assurance of love <give her my love>
2: warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion <love of the sea>
3 a: the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration <baseball was his first love> b (1): a beloved person: darling —often used as a term of endearment (2)British —used as an informal term of address
4 a: unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another: as (1): the fatherly concern of God for humankind (2): brotherly concern for others b: a person's adoration of God
5: a god or personification of love
6: an amorous episode: love affair
7: the sexual embrace: copulation
8: a score of zero (as in tennis)
9capitalized Christian Science: god
— at love : holding one's opponent scoreless in tennis
— in love : inspired by affection

It didn’t seem like much to me so I tossed my dictionary to the side and returned to my bed. I shut my eyes hoping that Gerard would be there when I opened them. It felt as if an hour went by when I re-opened my eyes. I turned to my side wishing for Gerard but only found my mom. “Mom,” I jumped up disturbed at the fact my mother was in my bed.

“Hey Frankie,” she spoke smiling and sitting up on my bed.

“Care to enlighten me on why you were in my bed?”

“I’m worried about you Frankie. You’ve been in this sulky mood for a while now. You’ve lost motivation for everything dear. Why?”

Was I really that bad? “Things just have happened over the past few weeks mom,” I said trying to avoid the true answer.

“Frankie, you can’t keep it locked in you forever honey. It just makes things worse.”

I kept quiet for some time picking at my pillow. My mother got up and started to leave when I asked her, “Mom, what is love?”

She spun around and put her hand on her hip. “Love is a wonderful feeling Frank where you know no matter what happens you know someone out there cares. It’s a feeling where your heart races and feels as if it’s going to burst when you’re in the arms of that special someone. It’s when feel whole.” When she finished she had a starry look in her eyes making them look glassy.

“Sounds mushy mom,” I replied chuckling.

“It sort of is but when you’re in love you don’t give a damn if it is. Why are you so hung up on love all of a sudden?”

“Well,” I sighed, “it’s a really long story. You might want to sit for this one mom.”

She nodded and sat down on my bed next me. I started from the beginning from when I first Gerard until two weeks ago. Well, I didn’t tell her about my first blowjob. That would be too embarrassing. When I was done she gave me a hug and asked me, “Honey, why don’t you give him a call then?”

“I’m scared mom. I don’t know what to say to him. He was so fragile looking when I last saw him. When I broke his heart and it makes even worse that I broke it on his birthday.”

“Frank, trust me on this, call him and ask him if you can get together.”

“Okay mom but, if all goes wrong you owe me ice cream.”

She nodded and left my room quickly. I pulled out my phone and dialed Gerard’s house number. It took ages until someone picked up the phone.

“Hello?” I asked when I heard the call be picked up.

“Yes, who’s this?” A female voice asked. I believed it to be Gerard’s mom.

“This is Frank Iero, is Gerard home?”

“Yes, he is let me get him. Hold on. Gerard! Get your ass up here you’ve got a phone call!”

I heard heavy footsteps through the phone and sighed. I could hear Gerard pick up the phone and I took a deep breath in. “Hello?” He asked.

“Gerard, it’s me Frank,” I spoke trying not to forget how to speak English.

“Hey Prin—Frank,” He said.

“I know it has been a while but can we get together soon? I really want to talk with you.”

“We’re talking right now, Frank.”

“I know but, I want to speak to you face to face. I’ve missed you so much Gerard,” I cried letting a few tears fall from my eyes.

“Frankie, please don’t cry. I’ve missed you too. Do you want to meet up with me now?”

“O-okay,” I sniffled, wiping my eyes.

“See you in five then and please don’t cry.”

The call ended and I shut my phone to go find my jacket. I slipped it on when I located it and checked myself in my mirror. I looked a hot mess yet, I didn’t care I just wanted to see Gerard. I ran downstairs past my mother and out the door. I easily spotted Gerard and his handsome self walking down the side walk and ran to him. “Gerard,” I shouted when I collapsed at his feet, outsized tears pouring down my face. He kneeled down in front of me and took me in his arms.

“Shh, calm down Princess I’m here,” he cooed softly into my ear. I felt him set me back on my feet and took my hand in his. “Come on darling let’s go somewhere where we can be alone.”

We walked until we reached the park where Gerard told me he loved me. Gerard sat on a swing and took a seat on the one next to him. My tears were near dry by now but some still lingered. “I’m sorry Gee,” I said trying to start a conversation.

“You don’t have to be Frankie. I should be the one apologizing. I just left you there after I said I would never walk away from you and pressured you by saying that I loved you.”

“About that Gerard I don’t know if I love you but when I do I’ll surely tell you even if I have to stalk you. I’ve just never been in love before so how would I know?”

“You’ll know Princess, you’ll just know it.” Gerard got up from his swing and walked over to mine. He slowly bent over and pecked me on the lips sending shock waves through my body. Gerard stood back up smiling at me. “You have no idea how much I’ve wanted to do that since my birthday.”

“Really?”

He nodded. “I love you so much Frankie you can’t begin to understand it. The past two weeks have been hell for me. I couldn’t function correctly without you. I would see you in the hall and just stop dead just to watch you. I’ve missed you so much since then. I missed your eyes, your lips, and your sparkle.

“You drive me nuts, Iero and I love every fucking minute of it. You make feel so alive when I’m with you. The greatest thing is you’re mine. I’m the lucky man that got to have your sparkle. I’m just so madly in love with you I don’t know what to do!”

I was touched at all the things Gerard said to me. He truly did love me with all his heart and would never let me go. I absolutely adored this man. “I know what you can do,” I said a light smile playing on my lips.

“Your wish is my command,” He answered, getting on his knees.

“Kiss me.”

He did.