Dear God, Why'd you Send me to a Host Club?

"Mommy! Make Haruhi a good girl for daddy!!" Tamaki clung to the ends of Kyouya's pants, tears pouring from his eyes.

"What the f--" I started, but the twins slapped a hand over my mouth.

"No cursing." They shook their heads at me.

"Proper ladies aren't supposed to curse!" Tamaki scolded.

"Yeah, well, I'm not a damn proper lady." I laughed bitterly, "I mean, I bet I've done things you guys wouldn't have dreamed of doing."

Starting with what happened to make me get here in the first place.

An awkward silence followed, but was broken by a small tug on the hem of my dress.

"I think Yuki-chan is a brave girl." Honey smiled at me. I automatically returned the favor.

Another small pause, then Kyouya spoke, pushing his glasses up his nose. "Well, we're going to need to set up some rules, and somehow get you a uniform --"

"A uniform? What are you talking about?" I raised an eyebrow, standing up from the couch.

"If you're going to pay your debt back to us, then you're going to need to stay here and at least act like a student. Besides," his eyes flashed dangerously, "where else are you going to go?"

I didn't appreciate the reminder, nor the subtle threat that went along with it. I could practically feel my skin bristling with the beginnings of anger and irritation. As if sensing a future fight, Haruhi spoke up. "Well, you can stay at my place. I don't mind --"

At once, protests arose from the rest of the Host club. "No, Haruhi! Your commoner's apartment is much too small for three people to survive in it!" Tamaki exclaimed. The twins nodded vigorously.

"Thanks a lot, you guys. This is why I didn't want you coming to see my apartment." She muttered.

"Actually, she can stay at my place for a while. My parents are out of town on a business journey; they should be back in about a week or so." Kyouya said.

Everyone stared at him.

"And I should be able to get you a uniform, of course." He scribbled something in a black notebook, then snapped it shut. "But it will cost you extra."

"Listen, I --" I snarled, but Haruhi pulled on my arm, tugging me out of the room.

"See you guys tomorrow!" She called over her shoulder, then shut the door behind us.

"What the hell?!" I asked her incredously, once we were outside.

"It wouldn't have been good if you'd blown up in there. Believe it or not, but Kyouya actually does care. He's just being his usual self about it." And with that, she walked down the hallway. "We'll probably be in the same classes together tomorrow. See you then!"

She rushed off, leaving me standing awkwardly at the door.

So what the hell am I supposed to do now?