Best Thing In Town

Tre is not the ideal lamaze partner. Let's get that straight right off the bat. The craziness began when Mike couldn't make it to a lamaze class with Audrey because he'd promised Anastacia he'd be there for Estelle's third grade graduation in which he took Katarina too. But that left Audrey alone, so Mike suggested Tre go in his place.

Why? Who knows.

Tre picked Audrey up at quarter after six to get to the hospital where the classes were being held. She brought a pillow and blanket with her and as soon as they were in the room and sitting down, the instructor had all the mothers-to-be lean back against their partners who were to wrap their arms around the moms. That's when the craziness ensued.

The intstructor started out with basic breathing exercises. Breath in, breath out. Simple, right? No. The partner was supposed to breath as well, but for Tre...he had to push the envelope. He made noises that were more along the lines of panting and subtle moaning. Audrey's eyes widened with embarassment almost immediatley.

"Tre," she bit out. "Knock it off."

"Sorry," he said, only to continue a second later with husky pants. When the instructor gave him the evil eye, despite the other couples laughing, Tre felt instigated. "I think I'm gonna---uuggghhh, yes!"

Audrey's face turned a shade of red, mouthing an apolgy to the instructor, while turning around as much as she could with her swollen belly to whack him in the chest with the back of her hand. "Stop."

"Sorry," he grimaced. "I couldn't help myself," he added like a little boy happy to have been caught red handed.

"Well, please try to. I'm supposed to be focusing on being calm, not hearing my husband's best friend pretending to orgasm behind me in a class full of people."

"Okay, okay. No more moaning," he promised with a grin, just as Audrey so happened to moan. "Hey, what happened to the 'no moaning' clause?"

"Uhhhhhaaahhh," she groaned. But this time there was a hint of pain. Her hands went to her stomach and she hunched forward. The other couples began to look at her like she were writhing around like Linda Blair in 'The Exorcist.'

"Mrs. Pritchard?" the instructor spoke. Audrey's cheeks went red from embarassment when she looked up at the instructor. "Oh, dear."

"Oh, what?" Tre wondered, getting a little worried.

The instructor met Tre's glance with a tightlipped frown. "Her water's broke."

"W-what? But she's not due for, like, another week." He moved to the right and looked at Audrey. "Right?" She just turn and glared at him. "Right, sorry. I'll just...uh...help you up." Tre stood up and moved around to Audrey's front as he gently helped her up, while supporting her lower back as well. "I may be a goof, but I've already gone through the birth of two kids, so I'm here for ya, Aud."

As she stood up, her knees gave out from the contractions that were beginning. Tre was almost not quick enough to catch her before she fell.

"Call Mike..." she asked in between groans.

"I will," Tre promised. "Good thing we're already in the hospital, though, huh?"

* * *

Like a flash of lightening, Mike darted out of the elevator and tore down the hallway to the nurse's station on the maternity ward. Slapping the palms of his hands down on the countertop, he almost barked at the young nurse sitting at the computer.

"Where's my wife?"

Flustered from the outburst, the nurse fumbled with how to respond. "Uh...who's your wife, sir?"

"Audrey Pritchard. She's gone into labor," Mike replied as if it was universal knowledge.

The nurse had barely finished telling Mike the room Audrey was in when he ran off in the direction he was directed in. Reaching the door, he pushed it open and found the nurses milling about a hospital bed that seemed to be emitting humanly cries of anguish. Amidst the nurses, a doctor sat at the end of the bed where Audrey was groaning out profanities left and right. His eyes laid on Tre would was scrubbed into a hospital gown and cap, holding Audrey's hand and coaching her through the contractions. A nurse came up to Mike, placing her hand on his chest and moving him back out of the way.

"Sir, you can't be--"

"That's my wife!" Mike pointed heatedly.

"Mike?" came Audrey's strained voice.

"Yeah, babe. I'm here now," he assured. He walked over to her and took her hand in his only to be met with a death grip like no other. "Ow, shit."

"Aaaahhhhhh!" Audrey cried out.

Tre looked over at Mike and gave an apologetic smile. "Hey, I think you're wife's in labor or something," he joked quietly.

Mike didn't laugh he just nodded and tried to see through the pain Audrey was inflicting on his hand as he leaned down and brushed her hair out of her face and kissed her forehead. "Looks like I made it in time," he whispered.

"Audrey, honey, I need you to start to push," the doctor instructed.

"Much...obliged..." she groaned out in pants. Her face went beat red as she strained to push the baby out. The doctor kept encouraging to continue, that she was doing good, to keep at it, until she rolled her eyes and snapped at him. "Oh, shut up!"

At that moment she gripped both Tre and Mike's hand tighter and both men would've dropped to their knees if they didn't know any better. All three of them groaned the same thing at the same time. "Aw, fuck!"

"The baby's crowning," the doctor announced. "You're doing real good, Audrey. Just keep pushing."

"Eeeuuuuaaahhhhh!" Audrey shouted, followed by a series of whimpery pants.

Mike bit his bottom lip, distracted from the pain in his right hand by the looming knowledge that he was about to be a daddy for a second time. Third, counting Katarina. He snaked his left arm behind Audrey's upper back for support, rubbing it soothingly. "You can do it, babe." He kissed her right temple. "Our baby's almost here."

"The head's out," the doctor spoke. "A few more pushes."

"Hear that?" Mike inquired, rhetorically.

"Yes, you idiot," Audrey growled. "I have fucking ears! Nnnnnnn..."

"Alright, Audrey, I need one reall good push from you. Just one more."

Straining with all her might, she squeezed Mike and Tre's hands for dear life as she proceeded in bringing her baby into the world. When the pressure seemed to subside, she opened her hazel eyes from the clenched way she'd had them, waiting from word from the doctor if the baby was alright.

"Congratulations! You have a beautiful baby girl!" the doctor exclaimed with a smile as he held the newborn up.

Audrey and Mike's faces dropped slightly. "Girl?" they asked at the same time.