Hourglass
One Shot
Drifting. Wandering. Stumbling.
I felt as though I was being pulled along through life without seeking it’s wonders. The world held no meaning for me anymore, it was as empty as the bottle sitting teasingly in front of me. The strong amber liquid that had previously been encased within this glassy tomb had already burned my throat and halted my emotions dead in their tracks. All of the pain I felt: the upset and the needs, had all disappeared.
I sat at the table in quiet contemplation. I thought back over things in the past, things that could and should have been, but had melted away. Slipped from my grasp and fallen too far for me to cling onto again.
I was alone.
Everything, in reality, is alone. You could be in a room full of people and still be a singular entity. Individuality may make you stand out in such a mass of people, but your actions and emotions are the things that truly pave your fate of loneliness.
I chuckled slightly at my drunken philosophy. Although I knew I was intoxicated, it made sense and hit home as a face swam in the bottom of my empty glass, making my breath catch in the back of my throat. My heart seemed to skip a beat as it disappeared. The image had scolded itself painfully onto the insides of my eyelids and I couldn’t shake it away, not even when my eyes began to fill weakly with tears.
Crying was weak. Tears wouldn’t make it better. I willed myself to stop, but my eyes stubbornly ignored my mental slurs and continued leaking. I cursed silently, bringing the back of my hand across my upper face. Looking around, I made the decision to leave the bar before I drank myself into a stupor. I stumbled towards the door and out into the car park. The weather projected my mood; the rain cascaded down as my car came into view.
If I was in my right mind, I would have stopped myself before I plucked my car keys from my jacket pocket. But, as well as fogging up the memories I wanted to disappear, I had also lost any sense and let my inhibitions take control. I slid into the driver’s seat less than gracefully as my conscience took the backseat.
I felt exhilarated as the engine roared to life and the tyres screeched on the wet asphalt. The windscreen was like a river, various tributaries and streams jetting across the surface like the veins of a leaf. I stared at them in wonder and jealousy, seeing how easily they met, joined and formed a new jet of liquid.
The left side of the car jolted sharply as the tyres hit the pavement. I quickly turned the wheel right, laughing loudly at my close call. I turned my head to look over my shoulder through the back window. I didn’t see ahead of me, I didn’t feel the impact.
My world went black.
Little did I know, as the life in me slipped through my fingers like the sand in an hourglass, that far away, they were thinking of me too.
I felt as though I was being pulled along through life without seeking it’s wonders. The world held no meaning for me anymore, it was as empty as the bottle sitting teasingly in front of me. The strong amber liquid that had previously been encased within this glassy tomb had already burned my throat and halted my emotions dead in their tracks. All of the pain I felt: the upset and the needs, had all disappeared.
I sat at the table in quiet contemplation. I thought back over things in the past, things that could and should have been, but had melted away. Slipped from my grasp and fallen too far for me to cling onto again.
I was alone.
Everything, in reality, is alone. You could be in a room full of people and still be a singular entity. Individuality may make you stand out in such a mass of people, but your actions and emotions are the things that truly pave your fate of loneliness.
I chuckled slightly at my drunken philosophy. Although I knew I was intoxicated, it made sense and hit home as a face swam in the bottom of my empty glass, making my breath catch in the back of my throat. My heart seemed to skip a beat as it disappeared. The image had scolded itself painfully onto the insides of my eyelids and I couldn’t shake it away, not even when my eyes began to fill weakly with tears.
Crying was weak. Tears wouldn’t make it better. I willed myself to stop, but my eyes stubbornly ignored my mental slurs and continued leaking. I cursed silently, bringing the back of my hand across my upper face. Looking around, I made the decision to leave the bar before I drank myself into a stupor. I stumbled towards the door and out into the car park. The weather projected my mood; the rain cascaded down as my car came into view.
If I was in my right mind, I would have stopped myself before I plucked my car keys from my jacket pocket. But, as well as fogging up the memories I wanted to disappear, I had also lost any sense and let my inhibitions take control. I slid into the driver’s seat less than gracefully as my conscience took the backseat.
I felt exhilarated as the engine roared to life and the tyres screeched on the wet asphalt. The windscreen was like a river, various tributaries and streams jetting across the surface like the veins of a leaf. I stared at them in wonder and jealousy, seeing how easily they met, joined and formed a new jet of liquid.
The left side of the car jolted sharply as the tyres hit the pavement. I quickly turned the wheel right, laughing loudly at my close call. I turned my head to look over my shoulder through the back window. I didn’t see ahead of me, I didn’t feel the impact.
My world went black.
Little did I know, as the life in me slipped through my fingers like the sand in an hourglass, that far away, they were thinking of me too.
♠ ♠ ♠
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