We Couldn't Change It If We Tried

Kevin and Blair were going to keep their pregnancy publicized. It wasn't as complicated for them as the situation Joe and I were in. Even though Kevin and Joe had broken our vows, Blair didn't have anything to jeopardize. She didn't have millions of fans looking up to her, expecting her to be perfect. I didn't want parents to question if I was a good enough role model for their kids. And so Joe and I decided to keep our pregnancy private. No one would know expect the family and possibly a few close friends. I know Joe wouldn't have minded either way, but this seemed to be something I needed and he was so kind to remind me that he had promised to let me always get me way.

Everything was okay, well all things considered it was okay. The only problem now was – Nick. He hadn't been seen since he left the family meeting, but I had a pretty good idea of where he was. "Nickie," I said quietly, walking out to his balcony. I brought some food that Denise had made. Something told me it would be best to let Nick cool down before seeing Joe. That didn't mean he'd have to go undernourished though.

"Go away," he mumbled from his roof. That's what I loved about Nick's balcony. The roof was low enough next to his room that we would sit on it and talk all the time. It was low next to Joe's room too, but he didn't get a balcony. Apparently, nobody had trusted him enough when they got the house not to accidentally fall out of it.

"But I brought you food," I held up the plat as a peace offering.

His face perked up a bit before falling again. "You can leave the plate."

I laughed. "Sorry Nick Jay. It's either both or neither. Take your pick."

He grunted. "Fine you can stay. But I'm not talking to you."

"That's okay with me," I said, stepping closer to the roof. "Help me up?" He reached down and picked me up, placing him next to him.

"Thanks," he mumbled as I handed him his plate.

"No prob bob," I smirked. We were silent as he ate. Finally, I got bored of that and realized I'd have to talk eventually. I reached over and took a piece of his roll. "So Nick."

"What," he looked at me.

"Why'd you leave before," I asked him. I didn't really know how to start, and this seemed as good a way as any.

He swallowed, looking at me hard. "I think you know."

"No I don't," I said quietly. I kind of did, but I needed to know for sure.

"I love you Dani," he sighed, looking down. "And I really don't need to here about how you and Joe has sex with each other and now you're pregnant."

His words came out harsh, and I was surprised that they hurt. Of course they did, I thought. Nick was my best friend, only second to Joe. His thoughts mattered to me. But he was being unreasonable about this. "He's still your brother Nicholas," I said quietly.

"And," he mumbled.

"And," I pressed. "He needs you to support him. He's really trying to do the right thing."

"You're pregnant Dani," he said. "Pregnant! How is that the right thing?"

"He could have just left me when he found out," I said quietly. "He could have made me go through this alone, acted like he didn't have to help."

"I would never do that Dani," Nick said, putting his hand on my cheek. "Even if he decided he doesn't want to. I'll help. No matter what."

"Nick," I said, pulling away. I knew what he was going to do.

"I love you Dani," he said, his lips meeting mine, hard and forceful. He had his arm around my waist in seconds and I couldn't pull away. He was pressing me to him. So I just numbed myself, not letting myself feel it.

He pulled away quickly, pecking my lips again a few times. I gasped at him before smacking him. "Nicholas Jonas! I am pregnant with your brother's baby. I am in love with Joe. Stop it! You cannot go around kissing me! I don't like you like that Nick!"

I jumped off the roof, not even waiting for a response. "Dani, wait," he called behind me as I walked into his room. I froze. Joe. And from the look on his face, he'd seen something that shouldn't even have happened. Oh I was going to kill Nicholas Jonas.

>>><<<

"DANI, DANI BOBANI, FEE FI FOFANI DANI," I sang, walking into my room. "Dani," I called out again. Where was she? Hmm – maybe she was outside by the pool. I walked to the window, searching for my girlfriend, and looked around. I sighed. Where was she? I looked to the side and froze. My girlfriend, my pregnant with my child girlfriend, was kissing my little brother!

Without thinking, I walked over to Nick's room. Sly little jerk thought he could just kiss my pregnant girlfriend because he had a balcony. Ha, he had another thing coming. And what about her? She's freaking carrying my child! And there she is, cheating on me with my brother.

Dani stormed back into the room, freezing as soon as she saw me. "Dani wait," Nick said. He froze too, seeing my expression. "Joe –" He began.

I didn't wait. I punched him in the face. He grabbed him face, kneeling with pain. "She's fucking carrying my child and you fucking kissed her. Some brother you are. Whatever your obsession for my girlfriend was, should have stopped when you found out she was pregnant."

"Joe," Dani gasped, touching my arm. "Stop, please." I looked at her and saw that she was panicking.

"Don't touch me Dani," I pulled my arm away. "You're no better. You're fucking pregnant with my baby and you're sucking face with my little brother."

"Don't fucking talk to her like that," Nick spat from the ground.

"Shut the hell up Nick," I said. "Or I'll make your other eye match."

"Nick stop," Dani said, her expression troubled. She started sweating, looking around like the walls were closing in on her. "Joe please listen."

"No," I said, not even looking at her anymore. I couldn't.

"Joe," she choked out, obviously scared. She started hyperventilating, and grabbed her chest. "It wasn't like that." She looked at me, her eyes pained and scared. She put her hands on her knees, as if helping herself balance "He – he kissed me, and I told him no. I told him I loved you, and –"

"I saw you Dani," I snapped. "Don't even try to lie. You know what. Maybe you'd rather Nick help you. I'm sure you'd rather be with him anyway." I turn away, leaving.

"Joe," she said, her voice weak. Something about it made me look at her. I froze, and then ran to her. She was on the ground, her hands and knees supporting her. She was obviously having trouble breathing.

Nick was beside her already. "Dani, breathe," he commanded. He looked up at me. "Don’t' freaking stand there. Call 911. She's having a panic attack."

>>><<<

We sat in the hospital for what seemed to be hours. My head was in my hands, guilt filling me. She had had a panic attack, I thought. Didn't they just have to calm her and then she'd be fine. Then we could go? Of course not, I thought. She was pregnant. This could be a complication. And if anything happened, it would be entirely my fault.

"Joseph honey," my mom put her hand on my back. "It's going to be okay." I nodded, not looking at her. "Dani's a strong one. It was only a panic attack. The doctor said there shouldn't be any complications with the baby." Her voice became low.

"Then why is she still in there," I asked, not convinced.

"They want to make sure," she said. "Now Frankie just fell asleep so your father and I are going to take him home, if that's okay?"

I nodded. "Go get some rest mom," I said.

"We'll be back in a little while. Blair refuses to go home, and you know Kevin's not going to leave. And Nick wants to stay," she said cautiously. I glared in the direction of my curly haired brother. "Be nice Joseph. He feels terrible."

"He should," I mumbled. He sent me a warning look. I sighed. "Fine mom. I'll be nice. Go, everything will be fine."

She kissed my head and they left. Blair came to sit by me again. "Hey Joe," she said quietly. "I – wanted to talk to you."

"Okay," I said warily. What did she have to talk to me about?

She sighed. "Look Joe, I'm not going to sit here and yell at you for getting her pregnant, not while I'm in the same boat." She smiled weakly. "But she's my little sister, and I think we should have a talk. You should still know my feelings."

"Okay," I said, still wary.

"You know that I've always seen Dani as more than my little sister," she said. "I practically raised Dani from when she was 5. I'm not complaining now, not at all. I love Dani as if she is my daughter even if she is just my sister. And I know she sees me as the mother figure she's never had in her life." I nodded, not saying anything. "And I may be pregnant too, but she's still my little sister. She has so much to look forward to in her life. And despite my predicament, I really wanted better for her."

"Me too," I said quietly.

Blair smiled. "And right now, I wanted to thank you for – not running away."

"I would never," I said firmly. "I love her, but more than that. I would help her even if I didn't, because it's my fault."

She smiled. "Doesn't mean I shouldn't thank you." She hugged me. "And don't blame yourself for this Joe. She'll be fine, and she won't want you blaming yourself. It wasn't your fault."

"No it was mine," Nick said, coming to us. He shoved his hands in his pocket, and kicked the floor. "Hey," he said to me.

"Hey," I said back.

"My hey is redundant," Blair said, getting up. "I think I here Kevin calling me." She left, leaving me alone with Nicholas.

"Can we talk," he asked.